Breaking up - is this the end?

Comms69

My experience is roughly 1 month per year of relationship; but you'll see improvements as you go along

sweetsand

Comms69 said:

My experience is roughly 1 month per year of relationship; but you'll see improvements as you go along

It could be sooner from what I have seen if you meet someone else but please ensure it's no rebound on your or the other parties behalf.

ATB

saver772

sweetsand said:

Comms69 said:

My experience is roughly 1 month per year of relationship; but you'll see improvements as you go along

It could be sooner from what I have seen if you meet someone else but please ensure it's no rebound on your or the other parties behalf.

ATB

TBH meeting someone else is the absolute last thing I want right now. I couldn't think of anything worse.

Comms69

sweetsand said:

Comms69 said:

My experience is roughly 1 month per year of relationship; but you'll see improvements as you go along

It could be sooner from what I have seen if you meet someone else but please ensure it's no rebound on your or the other parties behalf.

ATB

Perhaps. It varies ofcourse; just my experience. 

saver772 said:

sweetsand said:

Comms69 said:

My experience is roughly 1 month per year of relationship; but you'll see improvements as you go along

It could be sooner from what I have seen if you meet someone else but please ensure it's no rebound on your or the other parties behalf.

ATB

TBH meeting someone else is the absolute last thing I want right now. I couldn't think of anything worse.

It's great when you get to that point though!

burlingtonfl6

saver772 said:

Thank you for the comments, I really appreciate them.

I spoke with her yesterday, which was hard- I've suggested having no contact for the foreseeable, to concentrate on ourselves in the hope we can both heal and love ourselves again. I felt a lot better after that yesterday, but this morning I feel devastated again. I've tried to start exercising and spending more time out of the house away from my thoughts which seems to be helping.

I think I'm going to use this thread to post my thoughts and feelings daily as it does help. 

Everyone says it gets easier, and I know it will but I'm struggling to see how or when.

Thanks again

Seriously?
Do you honestly think she's going to spend the time during no contact thinking about your relationship or you?
She's going to be exploring her new life with this new man. So whilst you're at home thinking about her she'll be in bed with him.

It won't last with the new guy. Give it a few weeks and it will probably be over. She might come back then, because you're her safety net, but she'll probably find another man.
Either way, you'll never trust her again.
Your options as a man get better in your 30's. Hers won't!

Comms69

burlingtonfl6 said:

saver772 said:

Thank you for the comments, I really appreciate them.

I spoke with her yesterday, which was hard- I've suggested having no contact for the foreseeable, to concentrate on ourselves in the hope we can both heal and love ourselves again. I felt a lot better after that yesterday, but this morning I feel devastated again. I've tried to start exercising and spending more time out of the house away from my thoughts which seems to be helping.

I think I'm going to use this thread to post my thoughts and feelings daily as it does help. 

Everyone says it gets easier, and I know it will but I'm struggling to see how or when.

Thanks again

Seriously?
Do you honestly think she's going to spend the time during no contact thinking about your relationship or you?
She's going to be exploring her new life with this new man. So whilst you're at home thinking about her she'll be in bed with him.

It won't last with the new guy. Give it a few weeks and it will probably be over. She might come back then, because you're her safety net, but she'll probably find another man.
Either way, you'll never trust her again.
Your options as a man get better in your 30's. Hers won't!

OP will get there, everyone has that one big break up. 

burlingtonfl6

Comms69 said:

burlingtonfl6 said:

saver772 said:

Thank you for the comments, I really appreciate them.

I spoke with her yesterday, which was hard- I've suggested having no contact for the foreseeable, to concentrate on ourselves in the hope we can both heal and love ourselves again. I felt a lot better after that yesterday, but this morning I feel devastated again. I've tried to start exercising and spending more time out of the house away from my thoughts which seems to be helping.

I think I'm going to use this thread to post my thoughts and feelings daily as it does help. 

Everyone says it gets easier, and I know it will but I'm struggling to see how or when.

Thanks again

Seriously?
Do you honestly think she's going to spend the time during no contact thinking about your relationship or you?
She's going to be exploring her new life with this new man. So whilst you're at home thinking about her she'll be in bed with him.

It won't last with the new guy. Give it a few weeks and it will probably be over. She might come back then, because you're her safety net, but she'll probably find another man.
Either way, you'll never trust her again.
Your options as a man get better in your 30's. Hers won't!

OP will get there, everyone has that one big break up. 

I know, I was in the same position when I was younger. My dad told it to me straight while other people were talking emotions.
His advice was spot on

Comms69

burlingtonfl6 said:

Comms69 said:

burlingtonfl6 said:

saver772 said:

Thank you for the comments, I really appreciate them.

I spoke with her yesterday, which was hard- I've suggested having no contact for the foreseeable, to concentrate on ourselves in the hope we can both heal and love ourselves again. I felt a lot better after that yesterday, but this morning I feel devastated again. I've tried to start exercising and spending more time out of the house away from my thoughts which seems to be helping.

I think I'm going to use this thread to post my thoughts and feelings daily as it does help. 

Everyone says it gets easier, and I know it will but I'm struggling to see how or when.

Thanks again

Seriously?
Do you honestly think she's going to spend the time during no contact thinking about your relationship or you?
She's going to be exploring her new life with this new man. So whilst you're at home thinking about her she'll be in bed with him.

It won't last with the new guy. Give it a few weeks and it will probably be over. She might come back then, because you're her safety net, but she'll probably find another man.
Either way, you'll never trust her again.
Your options as a man get better in your 30's. Hers won't!

OP will get there, everyone has that one big break up. 

I know, I was in the same position when I was younger. My dad told it to me straight while other people were talking emotions.
His advice was spot on

I agree. It sucks when someone moves on, we've all been there. 

But it's fun when you meet someone new and get all that excitement of the early days. 

badmemory

Comms69 said:

My experience is roughly 1 month per year of relationship; but you'll see improvements as you go along

I would definitely agree with this.  You can try relationships before that time is up, but frankly they are doomed because you need to move on properly, no harm in trying though!

saver772

badmemory said:

Comms69 said:

My experience is roughly 1 month per year of relationship; but you'll see improvements as you go along

I would definitely agree with this.  You can try relationships before that time is up, but frankly they are doomed because you need to move on properly, no harm in trying though!

I would suggest getting into a relationship when you're not ready and hurting someone else is causing harm.