5 months to emerge as a butterfly

benbenandme

Sorry for not updating for a bit - so he didn't reply that day so I deleted him, I then messaged him on Whatsapp to say I'd now deleted his profile on facebook, hoped he didn't think I was crazy and wished him well - he replied straight away saying he wanted to reply to the facebook message but just wasn't sure what to say. He said he understood why I'd done it and that I had to do what makes sense for my head. He said he's happy to stay in touch via Whatsapp occasionally. I feel much happier this week for doing it, I haven't thought about him so much and I don't constantly dread seeing pics of them together when I go on facebook.

In other news the original hottie has been messaging quite a bit this week, I also have been chatting with a new one, we are hoping to meet up soon. 

More excitingly I have finally had some inspiration about my job - I have been wanting to change jobs for quite a while, and suddenly yesterday I had a lightbulb moment - become a postwoman! It makes sense for me - I am up early in the mornings anyway, I walk miles (and would get paid while getting steps in), and there wouldn't be the constant stress and negativity that I have in my current job. A friend of mine is a postman so I'm hoping to see him this week for a chat about the reality of the job and figure out whether it would really be something that would work for me. It would mean I lose the 13 weeks holidays but I don't need them these days, as nice as they are, and hopefully I would enjoy the job more than I do currently.

Blackcats

Nice to read that you are feeling better.  Postie is a great idea - fingers crossed there are some local vacancies.  

benbenandme

So I popped round to see my friend last night and there was nothing he said that put me off - the only negative is that they never offer full time contracts, all new starters begin on part-time contracts (20-25 hours) although he says there is always overtime available. That would be a bit of a gamble for someone like me who doesn't like risk but he seems to think there wouldn't be a problem there. Maybe when a vacancy comes up I can ask him more about the likelihood of there being enough overtime for full-time hours. 

Today the weather is dull, yet again. This summer has been so disappointing I am pretty much up to date on housework and washing so today I do want to go out somewhere, not sure where yet though. I'm tempted to go into town for a mooch but don't want to spend money

benbenandme

Morning, quite a productive one here so far - last night I realised I'm still not using up anything from the freezer so I got some fish, mince and diced pork out to defrost and today I'm batch cooking to make some meals ready for when I'm back at work. I went to Sainsburys this morning and bought a bag of potatoes and some other bits and have already made a huge shepherds pie, next will be a huge fish pie but I need to get some more potatoes first. We might have the pork for dinner tonight, as I don't know if I'll fit all the portioned up dinners back in the freezer otherwise  

I've tidied the kitchen behind me as I've gone so I'm currently just waiting for the shepherds pies to cool then I can get them portioned up and start on the fish pie.

I've also switched one of my current accounts to Nationwide as they are offering £100 for switching. I have my main current account but I also have a couple of others that I use just for this purpose - I have two direct debits in it and that is all the requirements are for the switch, so hopefully a nice chunk of money to come for the boiler fund in a couple of weeks time. 

Right, off to get more potatoes then I can crack on with the next load of meals

benbenandme

Morning, a couple of days of pottering about mainly since i last posted. Yesterday I saw my brother and his family for a bit, I also got myself back on track with the eating and walking - I've totally taken my eye off the ball again for the last couple of weeks and have put on 4lb, so I am now back on it properly again. I know the weight will come off again easily enough once I'm walking and cutting out the sugar though.

Tomorrow I'm back in work for summer school for the week (cheers government!), although at least its a very welcome bit of overtime I guess. Today the weather doesn't look too bad so I want to tidy the garage a bit and stick a few more bits and pieces on marketplace. Other than that it will be about getting my steps in again. I forgot to charge my fitbit last night so this morning couldn't go for an early walk as it had to charge up. So instead I've had my egg on toast and coffee and am now just about ready to get started on the day. 

10 days left until payday and I reckon I've got about £200 left which I'm really happy with, although I really haven't done much over the last couple of weeks so have managed to not spend much. I still have around half a tank of petrol and can get by with a smallish food shop for this week I reckon.

benbenandme

Not a bad day so far - I've tidied the garage, taken a car full to the tip and have a pile of bits to go on marketplace which is tonight's job. I've also tidied up some bits in the garden and cleared the area by the bins which was a job on my to do list. Not much else on that list has got done this summer but hey ho, it can be a work in progress.

The house is clean and tidy, I've got an up to date list of what's in the freezer and am going to do a similar list with the bathroom cupboard - I often buy toiletries when they are on offer so need to see what is in there. I know there is tonnes of Lynx deodroant - ds still likes it and last week they were on offer online at Superdrug, after the various offers were applies they worked out at 80p each so I got 10 to last him a while

I've done 11,000 steps so far so need to do some more walking this evening and then get ready to go back to school  

benbenandme

And the bank holiday weekend is here I've done a week back in school, 3 days off then I have got more overtime on Tuesday and Wednesday next week doing covid testing in school again. At least it's a bit more money into the pot I have just been to Sainsburys and spent £30 on some bits to keep us going until September. I did buy some protein shakes a few days ago and had one today at work and it kept me full for ages, so I need to plan those into my day.

So this weekend is the end of my summer holiday really - I haven't done even half of the things on my list and I am aware that I have put on about 4-5lbs over the summer rather than losing some more like I'd planned. I am making a list of things I need to do over the weekend and that includes a good talking to myself to get back on track with my walking and eating again ... 

• Clean the car inside and out
• Put items on facebook marketplace
• Mop floors
• Clean bathroom
• Clean downstairs toilet
• Clean kitchen
• Clean bedroom
• Plan Septembers banking
• Plan walking / eating goals
• Update CV
• Tidy wardrobe / drawers

Blackcats

You are so organised!  

benbenandme

So its not been the best weekend so far ... yesterday the original hottie blocked me. I am guessing that he's met someone but I am gutted that he didn't have the decency to message me and tell me that. I get that we weren't in a relationship but I've been chatting with him and meeting up on and off for a year now. i just couldn't do that to anyone. It's made me feel really rubbish, that he thought that little of me that he couldn't even bother to send me a message ...

Blackcats

That's a really horrid way to behave and so immature of him.  It's quite pathetic really.  I understand why it makes you feel upset but I hope you don't let him affect your self esteem for anymore than a few hours whilst you get over the shock of his behaviour. 

Fingers crossed you'll have some good weather tomorrow so you can get out for one of your amazing walks.