Buffy takes it 6 months at a time

Honeysucklelou2

Sending (((hugs))) Buffy. 3 visits on the first day of a new term 😳. 

Buffythedebtslayer

The lurk and leave visits continued and I feel deeply unsettled. I haven't been happy there for a while I suppose. Not sure I have it in me currently to look for a new job. I guess I may be jumping the gun but I have been in this game long enough to trust my gut. 

I am exhausted. As well as mum being ill, medicating two pets, work being hell both the dogs have been ill and data had to be done. 

I barely knew what day it was.

Aims for the weekend 

1. Check bank 
2. Hoover house
3. Clean out animals
4. Clean kitchen 
5. Buy plants 
6. Meal plan. 
7. Plant herbs and add seeds. 
8. Work on Shed and conservatory. 
9. Build one piece of furniture. 
10. Washing

Buffythedebtslayer

I have hoovered, half cleaned the kitchen, checked bank and put washing on. Also let the piggies run around the herb garden. 
Now off out to do walk, buy plants and do a little bit of shopping. 

XX

Buffythedebtslayer

I bought a lot of plants! 
Cooked an awful dinner! 
Found a new forest walk. 
Have a lot to do tomorrow. 

Did over 12000 steps which is cool. 

in_need_of_direction

There’s always a lot to do. Good work on the exercise 

Willowtree222

12000 is really good x

Buffythedebtslayer

I did 15000 today..........Went for a walk with my friend (instead of building furniture.) as she was miserable, it was good really, tho came home and napped! and then obviously had to do all my chores. 
Then I did the animals and planted the herbs. I tidied my room a bit and did a fair bit of washing. I am kinda pleased with the weekend. Mum hasn't eaten well but am seriously hoping it is her teeth. We got a letter from the doctor and I think it means she doesn't have cancer but I am not exactly clear on what it does mean. Mum is in so much pain she wasn't really bothered - I mean I think she was but is too tired to show too much. 

Anyhow need bed XXXX 

Buffythedebtslayer

Ok so it is a weird time. 

Mum really isn't well. barely eating and entirely miserable. I am so worried about her it is insane. 

 I broke things off with !!!!!! head. As much as he has been an amazing support - as i have for him, he just hasn't been there recently and I know long term he doesn't want anything and possibly the end of lockdown is making it more apparent we would meet and of course we won't... and his father is ill and he won't talk about it.  I keep waiting and waiting and waiting and hoping and hoping. And because he is a really good guy he won't actually say, as in he doesn't want to hurt me (he did this with his last actual girlfriend) we just keep circling the drain if you see what I mean. So I took the decision. I love him and have set him free. Sounds naff but I needed to do it. I can't wait any more. I am exhausted by every bit of my life and just need to take control. I am disappointed. hurt. my ribs hurt and i can't seem to cry but I am sure it will come. The next six weeks are going to be hell but I am stronger than this situation. 

Moneywise it is about a week till pay day. Things are ok. 

XXX

Honeysucklelou2

Sending hugs Buffy.

Four_Seasons

Thinking of you buffy, sending love and hugs xx