Buffy takes it 6 months at a time

Buffythedebtslayer

Thank RP XXX It has been a very tough week. Work was BUSY which was good, but home life is depressing. Mum is still unwell and sad. She is barely eating or drinking. I have written to the doctors again. It is all I can do. 

I miss him and the possibilities he offered. Overall tho I feel.......better. Free, life is a blank canvas. Not what I expected at this point in my life and for the next few weeks I am focussing on work. Then I will assess my plans for the rest of the year. so tired now plus mum turned the heating up so I feel hot and sick. 

Catch you all tomorrow XX 

Willowtree222

Take care Buffy, it is always hard even if you know it is right. x

Buffythedebtslayer

I feel like the stuffing has been knocked out of me. Just so hard at the moment. Now it is the weekend and there is no work to distract me it is very hard not to jut sit and cry! We have been friends since 2018 and involved for most of 2019 not massively and I know I am right to do this but it does hurt. Plus I feel very sad that the person who got me through lockdown has gone....He was a good friend. He really was. I wanted more. 

In other news Small bunny has been referred to a specialist. Which will cost a lot. But there is a chance with proper imaging they can remove the lump maybe. I don't think it is likely. But there is a slim chance and he is doing well, put on weight and is lively so I will take it. 

I am taking the dogs to the groomers in a bit. Then I think I have decided to do my room. It is such a mess and if I am getting my vaccine soon then it wouldn't be a good place to recover. 

Buffythedebtslayer

I will not message him I will not message him. I am ok without him. I am good without him. I am good without him. 


argggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

XXXXXX 

Magpie100

Stay strong, buffy. You can do this. 

Sun_Addict

So I take it just being friends with him isn’t enough for you? Sorry to hear the small bunny is going to be expensive to treat but it does sound promising. Echoing the comment above, stay strong 💪 xx

Buffythedebtslayer

I have not messaged. 

I am proud. I know at my age etc etc, but to any 20 somethings it doesn't get any easier! I read the Midnight Library and it is such a good book reminding you of the possibilities of life, it really helped me this week. He is not for me. 

The dogs got groomed, I have done my washing, well I have a load left. I napped with the dogs. Mum actually ate which was good. 

Got to check the bank. XXX And do 10 minute of active walking.....

beanielou

I am going to order the book from the library.
Have a happy Sunday  xxx

Willowtree222

Keep going Buffy, it does get easier. x

Jellytotts

I hadn’t realised your friendship and moved forwards with him. Be easy on yourself, these feelings take a while to unravel.

Poor Bunny, he’s really going through it, must be so much stress on him and you. Do you feel the vets are giving you the best advice or just trying to make more money from you? Hope you can find solutions you can live with.

Glad your Mum has eaten, are social services in place to help liaise with the Dr? My mum is refusing to drink more than a few half cups of tea a day as she feels she’s constantly in the bathroom, she doesn’t want to leave the house incase she needs to go urgently - won’t believe us that she’s causing herself further issues...what is it with that generation?!