Crazy Cat Lady Chapter 4 - The Aftermath

crazy_cat_lady

Thanks for the kind words everyone. I love having my cats about and it's so hard to let them go, but the love and happiness from having them about is worth the pain at the end. And knowing that we can give cats that nobody else wants a happy life is also very comforting. You can't put your life on hold because you don't want to deal with grief...

I woke up with a banging headache this morning but had a hairdressing appointment with ds so we were up and about quite early. Also popped to L!dl for more drinks for ds. However, I've done a click and collect from Mr T for tomorrow because they sent me a £12 off £60 voucher - which it would have been rude not to use. So I've meal planned and sorted groceries for the week ahead at least. Also started mucking about with the budget to try and make everything fit after yesterday's little blow out...

Visited bestie for a cuppa and a bit of comfort - I didn't have anyone yesterday and wanted an adult to talk to. Then came home and slept on the sofa for over 2 hours, and thankfully no headache when I woke up although I still feel tired unbelievably I think I'm ready to get back on with the budget but seem to have lost a couple of receipts so will need to wait for it to actually hit the bank. I'm on the countdown to payday and very skint, and I wish that this PPI claim would pay out sooner rather than later as well. It would really help me at the moment.

I have ordered a little black and white cat ornament. I didn't want her body or ashes back, but thought it would be nice to have something to remind me of her. Frivolous but important to me.

MrsCatz

I am so sorry to read about Tuxy, my first boy went ten years ago and I cried for ages.  Kept expecting him to be behind me or on my bed. As others have said I still have pictures of him and I miss him. Sending you virtual hugs. It does get easier x

Honeysucklelou2

Grief can make you feel extra tired...good job you were able to sleep for a couple of hours today. The ornament sounds a lovely way of remembering Tuxy.

PurpleFairy26

Hope you managed a decent nights sleep cat. So sorry to hear about your loss 💜

Buffythedebtslayer

Hey up lovely XXX 
Hope you have woken up without a headache and slept well. So sorry about your lovely cat. I wouldn't be without the mini ark but it is bloody awful. To be honest I am quite happy to be back at work tomorrow, this half term has sucked! 
XXX

crazy_cat_lady

I agree Buffy - a truly rubbish half term. I'm proud that I'm a compassionate person, but things like this hit me quite hard. I've only cried once today, which is a bonus. On the plus side, all of the other cats are rallying round me - particularly naughty tortie 2... it's strange because she's normally happiest hiding on top of a cupboard somewhere but since Thursday she's barely left my side and shouts at me when I get back from being out and about. Bless her - she's so gorgeous.
Today has been the kind of day I wanted to have for the whole holiday. Pottering about, relaxing and resting and doing stuff I wanted to. I've done washing, dishes, cat trays, put the rubbish out and went to collect the shopping. Also paid for ds lunches for next week and filled in some forms I needed to do for dd to take to school tomorrow. DD isn't feeling well today, which is odd as she's normally quite a healthy human - I had wondered if her grief was starting to hit but she says she just feels a bit sick. We'll see how it goes tomorrow - if she's sick she will stay home. She hasn't had a day off yet this academic year so no biggie. DS is saying that he's had a headache all day as well. So far I feel physically ok... and mentally a little better. I'm freaking out a bit because ds school has moved over to a new dinner money payment system and I've missed the orders for this week's lunches. I hope they will forgive me and still feed him as it's week 1 of the new lunches - I don't like the idea of having to order and pay for his school lunches the week before. He doesn't want to order his lunches over a week ahead either - just prefers to pick on the day as he as always done. I know that the won't leave him hungry but apparently because I didn't order by Wednesday just gone then I'm too late for him to have lunches this week coming. Ridiculous. They need to sort that out quickly...
Also done loads of crochet and watching of box sets today, which as I say is just what I wanted to do for the past week. I would consider taking time off next week but I have things away from teaching that I need to be available for. I'm helping with interviews on Tuesday and taking some kids on a Climate Change trip on Wednesday... Happy days - as long as I get the risk assessment done.

beanielou

I wouldent want to order my lunch a week in advance either!

Buffythedebtslayer

Order lunch by Wednesday of the previous week for this week. That is a bit mental. Good on the crochet XX 

evebeme

Sorry CCL, but Tuxy is now over the rainbow bridge and at peace.

crazy_cat_lady

Not really very sure how I survived today. I'm beyond exhausted. Anxiety and paranoia at maximum levels already. Only cried once, but I am now already home and in my pyjamas and wondering how early I can go to bed. Seriously.
DS got fed so there really wasn't anything to be worried about. Still less sure about the idea of ordering lunches 10 days ahead but never mind. He's ok with it all.
My naughty tortie 2 has a wobbly tooth. I actually cannot believe my luck at the moment when it comes to the cats.   but I won't be able to ignore that for ever. She's my new guardian because she's barely left my side since Tuxy went. She shouts at me when I leave her alone and lies next to me and snuggles me when I'm home. It's nice, and quite comforting... but I know dental work isn't covered on the insurance so there's more money I'm going to need to find sooner rather than later. These cats are possibly going to bankrupt me now. I would say I was due a change in my luck but there's another 4 cats that haven't needed to se the vet recently so I won't hold my breath.
Right. I'm going to head straight off and rest and relax for the night. I am tired and need some decent sleep.