Dealing with Debt and Depression.

judderman62

Good luck with the meeting Lucy :grouphug:

Lucy1982_2

Meeting was ok.

I have a written warning on file for 12 months, and that's it. I need to see occupational health on friday (personally think they should have been involved from the start!) But my boss knew nothing about the company stress policy, so I got my point about not feeling like I had enough support across well. You never know they may actually help. I saw my Dr on Friday and he is pleased with how well I was coping, although he said the test would be today. And I am ok, I really can't be bothered to stress about it. My boss and I are sitting down today to go through an action plan so he can help me, and I can have set stages in getting back into it all. He also wants me to tell him when I am having a tough time so that he can help me (although he realises this is easier said than done!)

So all in all not to bad. Well I have been stressed and spent far to much, but never mind I can sort that once I've been paid (luckily I have savings in my car account!). I have also been diagnosed with Carpal tunnel syndrome or pressure on the median nerve passing through the wrist. Which means I am having to wear a splint and may need surgery!

It's been interesting

jammiejen

Thats good then Lucy, it sounds like they are willing to help at least,

and Carpal tunnel syndrome!? you really don't do things by half!

Jen
x

Dinah93

Hi everyone,
I just found this thread today but I've read it start to finish. It feels like I know some of you already. I never really equated myself with being depressed, but last night my OH realised I was trying not to cry over work stuff, and I just broke down crying on him and I realised that this probably wasn't normal. I despise my job as there is so little guidance, and I'm trying to do two jobs at once (neither of which are what I thought I was signing on for!). If I was just doing the one job I thought I would be doing, I don't think I would be so bleeding miserable.

From the beginning in brief, we moved 70 miles last June as I was unable to find work at a decent salary in my field, and I about double what my OH can expect to bring in. We know no one down here, and are very lonely which makes everything seem worse when after a rough day at work you don't have a friend to call to comiserate with over a cup of coffee. As a result I end up sat at home on MSE with a glass of whiskey most nights. I've discovered the only way I can face work without needing to stop the car to cry several times a day is if I arrange something to do afterwork, which is usually badminton at the leisure centre with my OH, although tonight I have a library sale. A carrier bag of books for £1, hope they havent sold out cos its all that got me through today, especailly as the water was off at work so there has been no tea There is very little else money saving I can think to do though!

I feel guilty feeling so rotten when I have enough money to live on, a roof over my head and a OH who loves me. So many people have it so much worse than me. I was handling the nasty job up until Christmas, when I got put on medication for my high blood pressure. Suddenly I found I was crying when I spilt my glass of juice, and yelling at my OH for leaving his socks on the floor. I also started trying to obsessively make lists to control things, and not eating as I felt like if I couldnt control my life, at least I can control my weight. Then a little lightbulb popped on, I googled my medication and found forums and forums of people who had become depressed or had moodswings once on it. Worse, it seems to be addictive, so I came off it without telling my GP. Now my nurse at the new surgery keeps saying scary things about my bp being in stroke range (at 23!), but I won't go back on them because last time I just couldn't see any benifit in getting out of bed in the morning, and I was only on them 3 weeks. But the blues still haven't gone as you might gather. To top it off my OH quit his job 3 weeks ago after being asked to knowingly break the data protection act. Itwas a rubbish job that barely brought in £300 a month, but now he's at home all day, and I still have to go to my miserable job whereas he got to quit his without worry as he's debt free and knows his wages are just a drop in the ocean anyway.

And I'm rambling on, I'm sorry, I just read all this and I felt like you were all such understanding people, and had gone through so much, I felt like maybe you wouldn't judge me if I opened up to you. Glad to hear your meeting went well, I have no idea if my company have a net usage policy, I hope not, whenever I'm lost in what I'm trying to do at work and no one can give me an answer, I come on here!

Keeping_Positive

Hi Dinah

Thank you for feeling that you could open up to us. I hope it helped. Sometimes I find it theraputic to just write it down and stop things going around and around in my head. Dont let OH sit back without doing anything. OK he quit thats fine but he needs to be on the look out for work ASAP and help around the house whilst looking.

Doctors can help so please try to explain to them how your feeling. Write it down before you go or you may end up like me and just cry for 10 minutes!

Please try not to let work get you down its really not worth it. In the long run I would rather have a job that didnt run me into the ground completely and struggle for money than be ok financially and end up with a breakdown.

I hope to "see" around soon.

Lucy1982_2

Hi Guys

I hope everyone is ok today. Dinah I would really go back and see your Dr you never know he may be able to help. If not you are entitled to see someone else.

Talking can help so feel free to have a chat anytime.

I'm doing better, I find myself feeling a little more positive about things, although there are still the odd low time.

Keep smiling everyone, it will get better

xx

jammiejen

Afternoon everyone,

I'm just searching through the net and I have found this;
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/7240545.stm

I thought it might be of some use to people, its definately interesting!

Let me know if I'm not allowed to do this.
Jen

Burlesque_Babe

Lucy - I've just found your outcome of your meeting - I've been worried about you. Glad it went better than you feared .

firepoppy

Hello everyone. I'm new here I've not read the whole thread, just the first post but I will try to read it all asap.

I've suffered from depression/anxiety on and off for the past 7 years When i'm down I eat and spend more to try to cheer myself up. I was off work for a long time last year and didn't have much money coming in so my Dad starting helping me out with my credit card repayments and still does.

Last year I moved out of my parents' house to live with my boyfriend. Then in September I quit my full time job which I hated and enrolled in college. I've missed a lot of the work and I think the best thing to do is to stop going to college and look for another part time job, pay off some of my debt and go back to college to do Maths for a year in september. Then I want to work as much as I can whilst studying for that year and lower my debts as much as I can till I go to uni September 2009.

I'm not sure exactly how much debt I'm in right now. My Dad has been helping me out a lot and I haven't really looked at how much I owe for a while. He's been trying to make more than the minimum payments for a while but sometimes he hasn't been able to pay more. I have 2 credit cards and an overdraft. I have quite a low credit rating as I've missed a lot of payments in the past.

I'm currently reading "The Money Diet" and I feel much more optimistic. I've made up a budget and I'm going to try my best to stick to it! I work 14 hours a week and that's the minimum I need to live on. I'm going to try to get another job of about 20 hours a week and use that money to pay off my debts.

To make things worse, my boyfriend, who is also a student has just been diagnosed with depression and put on medication (he refuses counselling). He's missed a lot of work this year and is going to restart the year again in September. he's not currently going to college so i doubt he will get his student loan after Easter. I'm going to try to get him to go to the CAB with me on Monday to see if he can claim incapacity benefit or something.

I only switched form the doctor next to my parents' to one near where I live now a few weeks ago and I haven't seen my new doctor yet but I'm going to make an appointment on Monday for Thursday or Friday and try to see a counseller regularlly. i went a few times to see one at my old doctor's but I kept cancelling appointments as I didn't want to go all that way to see her.

skintas_2

@fire poppy same here i suffer depression currnetly on antidepressants i have a social worker. she keeps getting on at me, to go to counselling, i think that somethings i cant talk about. even thou its all confidential i think its cos i feel ive always been let down in the past. ive told people secret things they have alsywa betrayed me....... my social worker cant figure out why i suffer from depression i dont feel i can tell her. most of my family know what made ot worse just feel i cant tell my social worker, i dont wanna be judged. good luck everyone.its a daily battle x x