Housework

Gavin83

Slinky wrote: »

I find it amusing that blokes think they can get away with including driving as a 'job'.

Why not? I'd happily swap it for anything, it's by far the most tiring of my 'jobs'. I do a fair bit of long distance driving, driving for 10 hours over a weekend is far more draining than spending 10 mins running the hoover round, or cooking dinner.

Pollycat

Gavin83 wrote: »

Why not? I'd happily swap it for anything, it's by far the most tiring of my 'jobs'. I do a fair bit of long distance driving, driving for 10 hours over a weekend is far more draining than spending 10 mins running the hoover round, or cooking dinner.

And that's why relationships need - imho - some agreement about what is a fair division of labour, based on what other responsibilities each person has.
It's about fairness.
I think it says a lot about the OP's relationship that she feels guilty that her partner has to drive her to work because of her medical problems, even though he works round the corner.
I'd be questioning whether that feeling was in my head or real.

maman

Pollycat wrote: »

And that's why relationships need - imho - some agreement about what is a fair division of labour, based on what other responsibilities each person has.
It's about fairness.
I think it says a lot about the OP's relationship that she feels guilty that her partner has to drive her to work because of her medical problems, even though he works round the corner.
I'd be questioning whether that feeling was in my head or real.

If he works round the corner then it wouldn't be very :money: to take 2 cars to work.

Pollycat

maman wrote: »

If he works round the corner then it wouldn't be very :money: to take 2 cars to work.

Well, that's where the OP says he works - post #37.
I guess whether using 2 cars is :money: or not is a different topic.

Caraway90

Pollycat wrote: »

And that's why relationships need - imho - some agreement about what is a fair division of labour, based on what other responsibilities each person has.
It's about fairness.
I think it says a lot about the OP's relationship that she feels guilty that her partner has to drive her to work because of her medical problems, even though he works round the corner.
I'd be questioning whether that feeling was in my head or real.

I suppose it's partly because I pride myself on being indepedent. I have never liked relying on other people and would never assume people will help me or take it for granted.

suki1964

Pretty traditional in this house in that Mr S does the cars, the garden, the DIY, the bins, the fires

I do the cooking and the washing and ironing, we both take care of the general housework, only he's more particular then me but he doesn't do bathrooms I do the shopping but he often comes with me

We both work part time

A dishwasher solved the washing up question, even years ago when we had the tiniest kitchen in the world, I bought a work top dishwasher. Maybe this is something you can look at?

Caraway90

maman wrote: »

If he works round the corner then it wouldn't be very :money: to take 2 cars to work.

We used to take 2 cars as I have set hours whereas my partner has a very reactive job so can sometimes be at work until 7. We work 5 miles from home, it takes about 15/20 minutes to drive so it's not an overly expensive commute.

suki1964

Caraway90 wrote: »

I suppose it's partly because I pride myself on being indepedent. I have never liked relying on other people and would never assume people will help me or take it for granted.

I totally understand this as Im the same

However I recently had a very nasty fall and Ive not been able to drive since and it is hard having to rely on other people to help but Im having to suck it up. Im going to try to drive today because Im planning on returning to work tomorrow but I have to admit, the past two weeks have been hell on earth for me.

Caraway90

suki1964 wrote: »

I totally understand this as Im the same

However I recently had a very nasty fall and Ive not been able to drive since and it is hard having to rely on other people to help but Im having to suck it up. Im going to try to drive today because Im planning on returning to work tomorrow but I have to admit, the past two weeks have been hell on earth for me.

Yeah I am not enjoying it all! We live in the suburbs of a town and public transport is okay, but not fantastic. I know people have much worse problems than this, but it's hard when you're used to something and then it's taken away.

Pollycat

suki1964 wrote: »

I totally understand this as Im the same

However I recently had a very nasty fall and Ive not been able to drive since and it is hard having to rely on other people to help but Im having to suck it up. Im going to try to drive today because Im planning on returning to work tomorrow but I have to admit, the past two weeks have been hell on earth for me.

I'm very independent too.
And I too have had medical issues (operation) that meant I had to rely on my OH for pretty much everything for 8 weeks - even making a cup of tea.
I didn't like it one bit.
Almost 6 months on, it's still having an impact on our normal lives.
But not once did I feel guilty.
I'd have done the same for him.
It's called being in a partnership.

So OP...is your partner making adjustments to his routine without making you feel guilty?
Or is he being a martyr about it?

Sorry to hear about your accident, Suki.