Aspergers/ASD support thread

bestpud

kegg wrote: »

I wish people wouldn't just think kids with behavioural issues should be sent off to SEN schools.

My oldest is in a SEN school he does NOT have any behavioiural issues and has enought to deal with without having the risk of a child who cannot control himself lob a chair at him.

I dont know what the answer is but why should my child suffer just because you parents of so called normal children in mainstream dont want that sort of child sitting next to them. Not that i am judging them for that as in all honesty i dont want mine to have to put up with that either.

On a side issue my sons SEN school would not put up with that behaviour, diagonised or not 3 strikes and you are out. Infact the last ofsted was glowing but they marked the school down only on the fact that they suspend so many pupils.

I think, in general, SEN schools are better equipped and/or staffed to deal with challenging behaviour tbh.

Bad as it may seem to think of this happening in your child's school, it is worse in a very large class with no extra support
for the teacher.

Every school could be great if they just shunt disruptive children elsewhere but I think a truly effective school would manage this kind of thing and have no need to suspend so many children.

Some children need the extra support though and most state schools cannot hope to finance it, sadly.

end_of_my_tether_2

kegg wrote: »

I wish people wouldn't just think kids with behavioural issues should be sent off to SEN schools.

My oldest is in a SEN school he does NOT have any behavioiural issues and has enought to deal with without having the risk of a child who cannot control himself lob a chair at him.

I dont know what the answer is but why should my child suffer just because you parents of so called normal children in mainstream dont want that sort of child sitting next to them. Not that i am judging them for that as in all honesty i dont want mine to have to put up with that either.

On a side issue my sons SEN school would not put up with that behaviour, diagonised or not 3 strikes and you are out. Infact the last ofsted was glowing but they marked the school down only on the fact that they suspend so many pupils.

So where would you suggest he goes exactly? He's not welcome in mainstream school and now you say he shouldn't be in a specialist school either?????
He wouldn't be going to a SEN school purely because of behavioural issues (autism is an illness btw) but because he doesn't even have a reading/writing age of a reception aged child and he is in year 3.

end_of_my_tether_2

thelastunicorn wrote: »

I have AS. One of the key symptoms for it is normal development - in fact, most kids with AS have much higher IQs than others their age - so I think it would be pertinent to examine whether he is behind in his reading and writing because he can't settle at school, or is challenged in some other sense.

There are other options. ADHD is greatly stigmatised, but your boy does sound very much like that type. People with AS are very disinclined to lie (I would go into why, but it'd take ages), and you say that your son does a lot.

CAMHS were useless when I was at school.. I hope they're better in your area, but I'd contact specialists for assessments.

I think you should look at dyslexia, dyspraxia, ADHD and specific learning difficulties. These all overlap - and overlap further into autistic spectrum conditions - but those four are more likely to be indicated by poor academic performance; Asperger's is really not associated with that.

Does he have very narrow interests? Is he calmer if he has, say, a toy of Thomas the Tank Engine (trains being a common aspie interest) with him in a given situation?

Like I said, there is a lot of overlap, and misdiagnosis often causes more harm than good in the long run, so make sure he's given assessment for a few different things. For example, my boyfriend has ADHD (and, boy, do you know it!) but still suffers when plans change, the same as me. The difference is that I become anxious and he tends to get angry and frustrated.

I hope your son is OK. I know I wouldn't like to be in a classroom with someone who was violent - it would scare me! - but I can empathise if he is struggling with things himself.

To the lady who waffled on about the safety of her own daughter - your kid is not in this situation. The view that all people with special needs should be put into "schools that can handle them" - i.e. special schools - is nonsense. Maybe if we think your child is a bit thick, we should put them in a school for thick kids? I'm sure you'd be up in arms about that, along with all the other Mums in their Chelsea tractors with the Daily Mail under their arms.

The point of a fair society is that we learn to help each other out. In an ideal world, teachers would be properly trained (they are largely not) and children would be taught by their parents to understand why some children behave differently, and how to act appropriately in situations that can sometimes arise.

Are you planning to lock your DD away once she leaves school, lest she come into contact with a disabled person, or one with mental health issues? Or, perhaps, is it your view that THEY should be locked up?

It takes all kinds in this life. You should be more concerned about nasty girls with no developmental problems giving your daughter a slap than the minority of people with disabilities. Or more concerned with, maybe, teaching her the tolerance you lack.

Lying is a very common trait of someone on the autistic spectrum and sometimes the lies are quite believable because in that persons head it can actually seem as though it has happened. I was told that by CAHMs because I hadn't linked the two and I have read it somewhere on the Autism Society website.

We are looking at dyslexia (when school get their finger out) and I feel dyspraxia also. ADHD was also looked at by CAHMS but they and indeed I feel that Aspergers is what we are talking about.

Indeed most people with Aspergers have higher than average IQ, but this does not mean that everyone with aspergers does. My son is very intelligent when he is doing something he is interested in and has fixations that he wants to learn everything about (the police for example, which again Aspies tend to obsess over) He also enjoys maths and science. You can have a high IQ AND be awful at english.

QuiteNice

I work in education, so here are just a few thoughts.

You will not get anywhere without a formal assessment from the Ed Psych and CAHMS. You are not likely to get near them without a supportive school/teacher.

The school will not be able to afford to pay for any extra support for your child without banded funding. This can only be accessed by the SenCo (or Headteacher in absence of SenCo) applying for the funding from the LEA. Any extra support being put in place is at the expense of the rest of the school and pupils. Money is extremely tight this financial year. Most schools have had money clawed back already and live in fear of more being taken in the next six months.

The Headteacher cannot (CANNOT) send your child home without formally excluding him. What has happened previously is an informal exclusion. Heads do this to make life easier for themselves, rightly or wrongly. For an exclusion Heads have to fill in reams of paperwork, inform you and the local authority in writing and of your statutory rights, and arrange for reintergration back into the classroom. The class teacher will have to arrange for work to be sent home for the period of the exclusion, more than 5 days and the pupil should be provided with alternative education. Schools with lots of exclusions will likely be looked at unfavorably by the local authority. However a pupil with lots of official exclusions is more likely to be offered help and support.

If you are called and asked to pick your child up, very politely refuse. Unless the Head is formally excluding your child, they cannot send them home. This is not to say that your child should not be sent home, just that if they are, if must be officially. If your child is behaving in breach of the school behaviour policy, he should be sent home. This will be for his benefit in the long term. It is also for the benefit of the rest of the pupils and the staff.

Remember that the governing body and the Headteacher have a duty of care to their employees (the teachers and TAs) as well as to the other pupils. Your child is behaving in a violent manner, regardless of the triggers or causes. He is also disrupting the education of other pupils, to which they have a right.

Be polite and respectful when dealing with the school, support them in their discipline of your son. You will catch more flies with honey.

Listen to Milliebear - she does know what she is talking about. It does sound like your son's school is going into meltdown, an ineffective Headteacher is the death of a school and with other children in the same class displaying this similar behaviour it sounds like the staff are having to deal with a lot. I worked in a school that sounds a lot like your son's and it was horrible for everyone - staff, pupils and parents.

end_of_my_tether_2

Just an update as to what happened at the meeting with school today.

We didn't take him into school today (although we were expected to) when we attended the meeting because we didn't feel we could guarantee that measures would be in place.

The new acting head met with us along with someone from a referral unit that takes children for 2 weeks and works closely with them to monitor their behaviour and put strategies in place.

There was also a new teaching assistant who has experience of working with autistic children and he has been employed on a temp basis to work with my son and the other child who had been suspended. There is hope that the temp contract would turn to perm in the future (unsure about this).

The school have put some strategies into place for dealing with him and the new head looked very proud of her accomplishments until we pointed out that EVERY last one of those ideas had been put into place during the summer term so why were they not being used? We also pointed out that as our son is someone who is likely to be autistic he finds change unsettling so to implement these ideas and then remove them like they had done previously would cause outbursts.

We asked if all the periods of exclusion during 09/10 were logged and we were told that only one from dec 09 and last weeks were logged. That means they have ignored all the times we have had to collect him early and the 3+ months that he spent unable to play out at breaks and lunchtimes. We pointed out that if these would have been logged we would have gained more support for our son now.

We asked if he was statemented and were told that he wasn't so we then asked why the hell not when this has been going on so intensly since dec 09. We were informed that the local LEA make it incredibly difficult for schools to apply so we then asked why school didn't at least try knowing the circumstances and violence caused by my son.

We had already drafted a letter to the LEA asking for him to be statemented so we gave a copy to school and I sent the letter recorded delivery today.

School have said that he is welcome back into school but when we mentioned that we thought specialist education is what's required they certainly didn't disagree. The lady from the pupil referral unit stepped in at this point and suggested he be sent there for 2 weeks which we all agreed with only to be told it would take 8 weeks for him to be considered and even then it's not guaranteed because there are only 5 spaces in the whole county!

We have had to send him back into school tomorrow because without him being statemented he is never going to be considered for specialist education so we will have to play the fighting game to get him assessed.

andrealm

I don't understand why the school haven't been pushing to get him a Statement. Yes, they can be hard to get, but you'd think they would at least try, not least because it means they might be able to get funding from the LEA for a 1:1 if he was statemented.

Good luck with this.

end_of_my_tether_2

Hi,

Thanks for this.

He has been seen by cahms and ed psych last term. He has just gained band F funding last week we learnt today.

I think our posts have crossed as mentioned in my last post he was not officially excledued but the LEA have said that if he had been he would have automatically been offered support as there had been over 27 exclusions.

We have been very co-operative with school - I think slightly too much in the past - and this was commented on in todays meeting with the acting head saying that she was surprised by our co-operation and our ability to think of the whole class not just our son.

alm721

Ok I would now be doing the following.

1. If you've not done so, get that letter requesting a statutory assessment sent now! School should have requested one before now the fact that they haven't suggests they are tbh pretty hopeless. That said you have more rights requesting one as a parent then the school does.

2. Gather together any reports etc you have for your son which may be helpful in forcing the lea to conduct a statutory assessment and get ready for a fight, they do not give in easily.

3. Contact your GP and ask for a referal to a peadiatric consultant urgently, explain the situation, they are the only people who can formally diagnose. Statements and funding are not dependant on a diagnosis but it helps.

4. Be prepared to consider other options, e.g general a.s.d, adhd, etc, I also think from what you've described aspie may not be the best fit.

5. Get on the other websites that you have been given and read up! Also try the special needs forums section on mums ne. They have very many people in the same situation and are very helpful.

6. Do not allow the head to send your child home without it being on a formal basis, formal exclusions.suspensions will help with getting a statement.

7. Never forget that there is no-one else on the planet who will fight for your child the way you will. You are his/her best advocate!

8. Good luck, it is not an easy road, get help wherever you can, and remember knowledge is power, the more you know about how the system works, the more chance you have of getting the help your son needs, good luck.

p.s just a thought but are you working or at home? Just thought it may be the later if you were thinking of keeping him off. If so I would suggest that if they are not able to provide a consistant support for your child then you say that you will go in to school and stay with him. They will not necessarily like this but it might give you an insight into what the triggers are and you may be able to give them advice in dealing with him.

fazeypie

Hi there everyone! I'm 34 yrs old and suspect I have aspergers syndrome. I went to my docs the other week to try to get a referral for an assessment but apparently the local counselling services will only take on people that also have learning disabilities. I do not gave any learning disabilities. I have an hours counselling booked on thurs with an expert in the field of aspergers, her name is Maxine Aston, I'm hoping she will be able to tell me if it is worth me going for a private assessment as they cost a lot of money.
I am wondering however if anyone else has managed to get an assessment via the nhs and how this was done as I doubt I can afford it with Xmas coming up.

kabie

fazeypie

What part of the country are you in? You should be able to ask for an out of area referal on the NHS if there's not a diagnostic team local to you but that could involve a long wait.
I'm in Scotland so I'm not sure how it works if you're not here, doesn't the new autism Bill / strategy give a "right to diagnosis" or am I wrong?
You could try contacting the NAS helpline for info. of what's local to you, email using their online form here: http://www.autism.org.uk/en-GB/Our-services/Advice-and-support/Autism-Helpline/Helpline-enquiry-service.aspx

or phone
0845 070 4004

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