Aspergers/ASD support thread

moemum

Mandles wrote: »

I was just wondering if there is a link. Do many of your children get migranes?
Migrane can be headache or stomach ache , vomiting or just nausea, sensitivity to light and sound. often they need to sleep. They are usually fine the next day.

After thinking my lad was just a vomiter i have just twigged that he is having migranes. I read that there may be a link so wondered if that was true and if many of your children on here had migranes.

Yes, my 14 yo dd has had headaches for years but the past 4 months they have been much worse,to the point that she knows- where I keep the medicines,which one she is allowed, how often to take it! I am sure it is migraines she has ( they run in our family:() but wanted to make sure it wasn't her eyesight before taking her to docs so we went to optician who did all the tests and said her eyesight was near perfect, but gave us a prescription to show doc. Prescription migraine relief seems to work better, especially if it is the duo type (I have found).

kabie

Aspartame (artificial sweetener) E951
and
MSG (monosodium glutamate) E621

can be triggers for headache / migraine and are generally nasty.

We've cut them out, along with hydrogenated fats (caused us stomach pains / runny poos etc).
We all feel a lot better now. Here we have an NHS dietician who work with autistic kids who recomends cutting out these things: he has made the school recognise that for my kids this is a dietry need.
It's worth a try for anyone with headaches / migraine or stomach trouble : nothing to lose.

NoahsPennilessMummy

Hi
Not been about for a bit:o
Am having huge problems with DS (6) and his anger.
He explodes into huge tantrums shouting angrily at us. He has real issues with having to be in charge of every situation and being in control of people. I just do not know what to do anymore:(.
He seems on top note all the time, hand flapping etc.
He has autism and adhd.
Anyone else had this problem?
I have bought a book called "The red beast" and am working on it. Things like the 5 point scale etc didnt work as he just didnt "get it"

shazrobo

NoahsPennilessMummy wrote: »

Hi
Not been about for a bit:o
Am having huge problems with DS (6) and his anger.
He explodes into huge tantrums shouting angrily at us. He has real issues with having to be in charge of every situation and being in control of people. I just do not know what to do anymore:(.
He seems on top note all the time, hand flapping etc.
He has autism and adhd.
Anyone else had this problem?
I have bought a book called The red beast and am working on it. Things like the 5 point scale etc didnt work as he just didnt "get it"

((((hugs)))) i found that at age 6 my son was at his worst, and i cant suggest anything that might help, sorry for not being much help, just to say your not on your own, and it DOES GET EASIER

had one of my sons annual review today, i am so proud of how much he has progressed in this past year. he is studying hard for his gcse's, and is making plans to go to college. connextions are going to help him with his application, and get him to have visits there when he goes upto year 11 in september.
in the past he has been labelled a trouble maker, been told he wont have much of a future, people have made comments about him being in a special school. i tell him he goes there because he is special . he was so far behind in his school work, and hes made fantastic progress in catching up, just wanted to share


shaz x

rainbow81

NoahsPennilessMummy wrote: »

Hi
Not been about for a bit:o
Am having huge problems with DS (6) and his anger.
He explodes into huge tantrums shouting angrily at us. He has real issues with having to be in charge of every situation and being in control of people. I just do not know what to do anymore:(.
He seems on top note all the time, hand flapping etc.
He has autism and adhd.
Anyone else had this problem?
I have bought a book called "The red beast" and am working on it. Things like the 5 point scale etc didnt work as he just didnt "get it"

Hi, I have 6 year old son too and I am quite surprised that his tantrums seem more forceful than ever lately, screaming so much he's choking etc.

I have had to go back to basics, using techniques like a timer for when he is playing on his Wii and making a visual timetable for him to follow and fingers crossed he has stopped getting quite so stressed out and highly strung.

Do you do all of the structured things? Has anything changed? At home or at school? Have they stopped using the techniques that were working at school?

Sorry I don't know your situation at all but from my experience with my son it seems that the less structure his life has, the more he tries to control. It doesn't sound like it makes much sense but I think there is a certain security of knowing what is coming and what is expected for him and then he is happier, and subsequently calmer. I obviously get slack on this, and it's not helped that he has 2 homes but I am working on it!

R x

moemum

shazrobo wrote: »

((((hugs)))) i found that at age 6 my son was at his worst, and i cant suggest anything that might help, sorry for not being much help, just to say your not on your own, and it DOES GET EASIER

had one of my sons annual review today, i am so proud of how much he has progressed in this past year. he is studying hard for his gcse's, and is making plans to go to college. connextions are going to help him with his application, and get him to have visits there when he goes upto year 11 in september.
in the past he has been labelled a trouble maker, been told he wont have much of a future, people have made comments about him being in a special school. i tell him he goes there because he is special . he was so far behind in his school work, and hes made fantastic progress in catching up, just wanted to share


shaz x

Hi I just wanted to say well done to your son (and you:) ) I have had much the same with my daughter, trouble maker, arrogant(said to her by a teacher!) and more:( I really wish that people (especially teachers) could remember that Everyone is different!

Noahspennielessmummy
As above poster has said..it does get easier, my daughter was Completely uncontrollable when she was younger, everything set her of on one! but she is a lot calmer (well most of the time:)) now and has learnt to recognise some of her triggers. She 14 now and we are Very proud of her (but brokenhearted for her sometimes) You will find what works for you and your little boy, trial and error is how I got there!
You are not on your own..keep your chin up:) (((hugs)))

NoahsPennilessMummy

Thanks for the replies:D

my son was diagnosed at 2 so we have had a few years at it now;) but it just seems that just when you feel things are evening out another thing comes along....
I think that it was Xmas that really got to him:( he doesnt cope when his structure (eg school) is taken away in the hols and then Xmas throws him completely. He still gets put to bed at 7 15 every night with his usual routine but since Xmas it has taken him till 10 or 11 to get to sleep and he is shouting down to OH and I all the time. He is always awake at 4 or 5 ready to start his day so I feel like I have no rest time or time with OH at the moment:o.
He erupts into foul tempers usually when he is told no to something but also if you do not let him control situations which he wants to do all the time. I use schedules with him and he knows all his routines stay the same otherwise he can`t cope. I think if anything he becomes more distressed by changes at school. He is at mainstream but has a one to one till lunch then he is on his own:(.
When he loses his temper he throws himself about, screams and shouts nasty things right into your face and tries to break things like pulling doors off cupboards etc.
His dad and I are divorced and he goes there every other Saturday overnight but he has done this since he was 2 and it is just part of his routine so I dont think it upsets him much...although to be honest he is usually in a foul temper every Sunday he comes back from there, mainly due to the fact that his dad doesnt really accept the autism or try to do schedules or anything like that.
He is quite a tall lad for 6 and strong and it takes OH and I to hold him when he is having a "do".....I dread what will happen when he is taller than me as a teenager he will probably knock me out with a punch in anger:eek:
It is comforting in some way to know other people go through it so thank you:A

rainbow81

Hi again NPM,

I thought as I was writing my response that you probably did everything I was saying. I hoped I didn't sound patronising! I have just as many problems but sometimes it's different when faced with it day in day out.

Do you think that fact your ex doesn't do the schedules might affect him? I am in a similar position in that my DS goes to his dad's every other weekend and I know he doesn't prepare him for change and lets him get away with murder, to be honest, then I have to pick up the pieces on his return.

I really do think (in our case) that the need to control is very much anxiety driven and could be due to quite an unrelated event.

My son is also in mainstream school and gets 16 hours support. It's not enough in the slightest and the mainstream environment is just too busy and too focussed on free choice for him but we are bumbling by.

Maybe some peer relationships of your DS's have changed? Sorry, I sound like I am plucking at straws now, and I know my DS doesn't appear to have any friends to speak of, but he does have children he prefers.

Hope he settles down soon anyway, and you get some much needed sleep and adult time!

NoahsPennilessMummy

Hi

I don`t think you were being patronizing at all.....none of us know it all and any advice is always welcome:D.
I have a feeling the peer relationships may be changing actually. I think now they are getting older they just do not "get" DS so he doesnt have close friends, they are all playing things he is clueless about:(.
I think he realises he is different and it angers him. Recently I hink he has realised other children go to friends houses for tea and have them back to theirs for tea. He asked to have someone to ours but I am reluctant as the little boy next door comes to play sometimes and DS,although he wants him to come, cant cope with it and flaps infront of his numbers on the fridge and expects this child to do that with him and becomes angry when he wont.
His support this year is excellent but it is still not enough. He is in Y2 at the moment but I think Y3 or 4 could throw up some problems we can`t deal with and he may end up going to IR.
thanks for your support it is appreciated:A

laverne_2

Hello, hope you don't mind me joining your fantastic thread!
My 6 yr old son was diagnosed as having autism a couple of weeks ago. He doesn't seem too bad to me at the moment - main issues are concentration at school, hating school and occasionally having huge screaming tantrums when he doesn't get his own way!
School has been trying to deal with the concentration situation but don't really seem to be getting any results, when I asked what we could do at home to improve this I was just told to get him to do puzzles (which son does enjoy and always has so we are not really doing anything new here) He enjoys maths in school but struggles with literature. Have bought him some reading/writing workbooks for him to do at home which he is really enjoying and is able to complete the work with a bit of explaining and encouragement.
I have just been trying to ignore his tantrums when he has them as tbh I don't really know how to deal with this and don't really want to risk getting into an argument with him and getting cross as I am not sure if the tantrums are down to naughty behaviour or are a result of the autism? Also I'm fed up of other family members telling me to 'sort him out' and that he is not autistic just spoilt (tbh this has crossed my mind as well).
The main problem for me is getting son to school - over the past month he has really started to hate school and tells me upto 10 times a day that he doesn't like it/doesn't want to go etc. The week leading upto half term was unbearable. He had to be dragged in one day by 2 male teachers, had to walk him from the office through the school to his classroom on another occasion and was an hour late on another day because he was refusing to get ready in the morning!
Anyway, I'm really sorry to rant on and on but just needed to get things off my chest as although I know these problems are not half as bad as what some of you are experiencing they are making me quite upset at times and was hoping some of you maybe had some advise on ways I could help my son become happier with school. Am hoping to look into a support group near me soon but am doing up the kitchen this week and its all a bit hectic! Thanks, Laverne