Aspergers/ASD support thread

blue_monkey_2

Mandles wrote: »

The one with six children in the class sounds like the one they suggested to me. My problem is that i know he copies behaviour and he is hideous now, let alone if he picks up other new and awful behaviour from others like him. I am hoping that he picks up normal behaviour.

I also feel that he is very intelligent and has an amazing memory so i feel focused in the right direction he could do well in the end.

Mandles, my son has picked up some awful stuff from the 'normal' kids in his class, plus they do horrible stuff to him too. There is a lot of physcological bullying going on in his class too - none of which the teacher sees of course. If your son needs closer attention maybe give it some thought as he will not get bullied and there will be more teachers to help out. Swings and roundabouts. What awful things do you think he is going to pick up?

it is a hard descision but remember not all the other kids are going to be showing him the good stuff they do, the awful ones certainly know how to manipulate our kids for their own entertainment. :mad:

shazrobo

scrimpingbadger wrote: »

Sorry to butt in. My boy is suspected of ASD with a speech and language disorder. I'd like him to start Beavers Scouts - what are other's experience of this?
There's also an option of Badgers too.
Any thoughts?
Thanks in advance.

both my lads did beavers and cubs, and enjoyed it. the staff knew their difficulties and kept an eye on them and intervened where necesarry, they were also well looked after on camps, there was only one occasion where one of them got sent home.

scrimpingbadger

Thanks guys. I feel reassured by your response.

Bitsy_Beans

Can I join you?
My son was offically diagnosed as having ASD this week. We'd suspected it (and it had been mentioned as a possibility at his last assessment). I've got the weepy stuff out of the way and am actually glad to have a diagnosis but I think my H is struggling with this. He's not interested in seeing any parent support groups or reading any books (he doesn't see any benefit because all the kids are different so someone elses perspective won't match our sons). He's tying himself in knots worrying about whether DS is going to get worse etc. I don't want to push him too much but what's the best way I can support him - is it just to keep talking and leave him to come to terms with it? Our son isn't a severe case (but it's a been a week of quite challenging behaviour for some reason - plus there are sleeping issues going on too) but my H is the sort of person that likes numbers, things to be quantified. He'd really like someone to say "OK your son is around here on the spectrum" but I am not sure anyone will give him that response.

Sorry rambling a bit

DS is 4, our first and we have no idea what of his behaviour is normal 4 year old boy stuff and whats ASD. Anyone got a manual? :rotfl:

blue_monkey_2

Did not want to read and run but yes of course, you are more than welcome. I will post more later though when I get 5 minutes and chat some more. I am just catching up on MSE while having breakfast (as you do)!!

Indie_Kid

Bitsy_Beans wrote: »

leave him to come to terms with it?

I think with any diagnosis, people do need time to come to terms with it and understand it.

he doesn't see any benefit because all the kids are different so someone elses perspective won't match our sons).

I think this is debatable. As I've mentioned before, (I think) I have a friend and brother who both have ASD. They are so alike - it's rather, um, scary?

TheEffect

blue_monkey wrote: »

Mandles, my son has picked up some awful stuff from the 'normal' kids in his class, plus they do horrible stuff to him too. There is a lot of physcological bullying going on in his class too - none of which the teacher sees of course. If your son needs closer attention maybe give it some thought as he will not get bullied and there will be more teachers to help out. Swings and roundabouts. What awful things do you think he is going to pick up?

it is a hard descision but remember not all the other kids are going to be showing him the good stuff they do, the awful ones certainly know how to manipulate our kids for their own entertainment. :mad:

This is so true.

I'm a LSA for an autistic boy in year 9. The other pupils are always picking on him and belittling him for their own amusement. The teacher does not see it and it is up to me to deal with, however they take no notice.

When talking to senior staff about it, they do nothing. It's ridiculous.

Savvy_Sue

Bitsy_Beans wrote: »

but my H is the sort of person that likes numbers, things to be quantified. He'd really like someone to say "OK your son is around here on the spectrum" but I am not sure anyone will give him that response

:rotfl: You might find in time that you think your OH is somewhere on the spectrum too!

It IS hard when it's your first. I always knew there was something 'different' about DS1, it was just never bad enough to march down to the GP and refuse to leave until someone told me what it was. So being told he had Asperger Syndrome (probably) when he was 12 was a huge relief.

There is a part of me which thinks that the more interaction you can manage with as wide a range of children as possible, the better. Obviously for some children then that's too stressful, but as you mix with other children and parents you get to see that your child's strengths are weaknesses for them.

And DS1 really didn't like the fact that life wasn't 'fair'. Mixing with other children allowed me to reinforce, at regular intervals, that life ISN'T fair, it never will be, and you do have to deal with that!

Now, that may not help you and your child, but it may help someone.

He's just moved out into his own flat, btw, graduated this summer, self employed. Can't grumble at that.

Bitsy_Beans

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

:rotfl: You might find in time that you think your OH is somewhere on the spectrum too!

We were saying that last night :rotfl: I know next to nothing about autism etc but my own personal feeling is that everyone is probably on the scale at some point. Me and H were discussing things and my H is very black and white - grey areas don't exist, he's can be quite rigid in his thinking (and not always open minded) so I suspect my H does have traits of ASD as I probably do. I am not as sociable sometimes, I quite like my own company etc.

DS has always been different to the other kids. At 6 months old I'd take him to a soft play group and he hated it there. The music was too loud and he didn't like the group singing. He's never liked birthday parties or sitting at the table with large groups of children to eat. When he was a young toddler my friends were envious of his ability to play so well on his own in comparison to their demanding children. He didn't speak any words until he was 28 months and then it went from single words to 3 word sentances in a month. I think the worst thing for me was seeing him aged 3 playing in the playground at pre school. All the other kids were milling around together, not purposefully playing with each other but still interacting. And there was DS, up the corner, completely oblivious to them all and happy on his own. I could have broke down and cried
On the other hand he's a typical boy who likes racing around, space, robots and Marvel comic characters and making dens. I think this is perhaps what my H struggles with as a lot of the time he seems like everyone else and if his ASD isn't that pronounced does he in actually have it!

For me the diagnosis was a relief. His recent sleeping issues (keeps waking and crying) were getting to me and I felt like a bad mother who shouldn't have had kids as I couldn't cope with the broken sleep. Although I still don't know if his waking issues are related to ASD or just a bad patch its allowed me to get some perspective on it from the view that if it is ASD related he can't help it.

Sorry more rambling from me.

Savvy-sue - well done to your DS on graduating and getting his own place.

Savvy_Sue

Bitsy_Beans wrote: »

DS has always been different to the other kids. At 6 months old I'd take him to a soft play group and he hated it there. The music was too loud and he didn't like the group singing. He's never liked birthday parties or sitting at the table with large groups of children to eat. When he was a young toddler my friends were envious of his ability to play so well on his own in comparison to their demanding children. He didn't speak any words until he was 28 months and then it went from single words to 3 word sentances in a month. I think the worst thing for me was seeing him aged 3 playing in the playground at pre school. All the other kids were milling around together, not purposefully playing with each other but still interacting. And there was DS, up the corner, completely oblivious to them all and happy on his own. I could have broke down and cried
On the other hand he's a typical boy who likes racing around, space, robots and Marvel comic characters and making dens. I think this is perhaps what my H struggles with as a lot of the time he seems like everyone else and if his ASD isn't that pronounced does he in actually have it!

:rotfl: your DS sounds VERY like mine at that age! Although he was never much of a one for racing around. Are they saying autism, or Asperger Syndrome? Which is on the spectrum, but the 'milder' side. If Asperger's, Tony Atwood's book is the one to get! And books by Kathy Hooper for your DS.