Am I being unreasonable charging partner a token rent?

happyandcontented

onwards&upwards wrote: »

You’re joking!! :eek:

Not at all, we do live in a large house though. However, I don't think we are unusual in the amount those items come to. Council tax alone is £185.

onwards&upwards

happyandcontented wrote: »

Not at all, we do live in a large house though. However, I don't think we are unusual in the amount those items come to. Council tax alone is £185.

I’m sure you can definitely save some money!

I live in a pretty big three bed house with high ceilings and my water, gas and electric come to less than £100 a month altogether. There’s no kids here who probably waste a lot but there’s two of us here at least half the week.

happyandcontented

onwards&upwards wrote: »

I’m sure you can definitely save some money!

I live in a pretty big three bed house with high ceilings and my water, gas and electric come to less than £100 a month altogether.

I am sure we could probably trim the gas/elec a touch, but we have a 4 bed/3 bath with a large Conservatory and a large family who pop in daily and we have one son still living at home. We have energy saving bulbs, thermostatic controls etc and a new heating system.

Our water rates are very high being based on rateable value, but we do use the showers a lot and the washing machine, dishwasher and hosepipe, so I doubt metered water would help.

onwards&upwards

happyandcontented wrote: »

I am sure we could probably trim the gas/elec a touch, but we have a 4 bed/3 bath with a large Conservatory and a large family who pop in daily and we have one son still living at home. We have energy saving bulbs, thermostatic controls etc and a new heating system.

Our water rates are very high being based on rateable value, but we do use the showers a lot and the washing machine, dishwasher and hosepipe, so I doubt metered water would help.

You must like it warmer then me!

As long as you can afford it, your decision, enjoy the heat! :beer:

I’d be surprised if it was typical though.

FBaby

OP your vision of the situation is a very self-centred one. You seem to consider it your right to have your cake and eat it.

What do you get from this: the companionship of a person you se company you very much enjoy and would have much above being on your own. Y wouldn't get this from a lodger who was a stranger. You get to wake up next to someone you love, get some nice cook meals, share the sofa with in the evenings etc...

However, you do want to treat them as if they are no different to a lodger you'd want nothing of the above from when it comes to money. You have nothing to lose, you can ask her to leave tomorrow, change the locks and that's that.

What does she gets: the benefit of your company too but then has to pay for the pleasure and with no security at all.

Can't you see how unbalanced your relationship is? The arrangement is all benefit for you whereas all she gets is your company.

You're lucky she takes it with humour because in her shoes, your self ce tiredness would be a massive turn off. I don't like selfish men who are all about ensuring their needs are met with not much concern as to whether the person they supposedly care for are too.

Your past is no excuse. That you'd be anxious at committing fair enough, but that you can't see how unfair your are being, that's just who you are.

OneHalfMortgageFree

No you're right.

What an animal I am for asking for a 10% payment towards her lodgings when of course she should only ever have to pay 50% of the bills; no more, no less. I mean, who pays rent anyway?

I shall also of course ask for 50% of all interest/dividends she receives from her savings and investments, given she only had those monies given she hasn't had to spend anything* on somewhere to live

*£200 a month adjusted, of course.....

theoretica

OneHalfMortgageFree wrote: »

No you're right.

What an animal I am for asking for a 10% payment towards her lodgings when of course she should only ever have to pay 50% of the bills; no more, no less. I mean, who pays rent anyway?

I shall also of course ask for 50% of all interest/dividends she receives from her savings and investments, given she only had those monies given she hasn't had to spend anything* on somewhere to live

*£200 a month adjusted, of course.....

So long as you each charge the other market rates for all housework done, lifts given etc etc (and to do it properly pay income tax on this).

happyandcontented

OneHalfMortgageFree wrote: »

No you're right.

What an animal I am for asking for a 10% payment towards her lodgings when of course she should only ever have to pay 50% of the bills; no more, no less. I mean, who pays rent anyway?

I shall also of course ask for 50% of all interest/dividends she receives from her savings and investments, given she only had those monies given she hasn't had to spend anything* on somewhere to live

*£200 a month adjusted, of course.....

Lodgers pay rent..........not partners and lovers.

If I were her I would be running for the hills. This is purely a business transaction for you.

need_an_answer

I'm now convinced the OP is nothing but a troll....and a potentially misinformed one on the laws regarding rent payments and the obligations of being a landlord.

On the relationship front he's also delusional he classes himself as an "animal" ...well my animals get treated fairer than his partner...so on that note I'm out

hazyjo

need_an_answer wrote: »

Just out of interest OP if you are continuing to charge a "rent" payment do you have a valid CP12 for the property that is renewed annually?

https://www.cp12gascertificate.co.uk/when-is-a-cp12-gas-safety-certificate-required/

There's quite a hefty fine involved should your partner wish to challenge you not having one.

I cant find the joke quite so funny now when you could quite clearly be breaking the law

Not if they're a couple. Not classed as 'lodgers' by any stretch of the imagination, even if he charges a 'rent' payment.

==================

I'm with the others I'm afraid. I've been married (and had my fingers burnt!) twice and lived with a couple of other people (both husbands had also moved into my property before we sold and bought together each time). If someone has moved in with me, they have paid half the bills and no more. Yes that means they get a cheap place to stay, but they lose all rights of a tenant or even a lodger.

You have an asset which costs you (or used to cost you) the mortgage and bills each month. By having one extra person living with you, it doesn't add up to that much more. Why should you be turning a profit and owning that asset while she has nothing in return?

I'm not saying add her to the deeds or mortgage (if there was one) - I always advise against it. But this should have been made very clear from the start. As others have suggested, any money she has spare should have ideally gone into savings so either you buy together later down the line, or she at least has a 'get out plan' if it all goes Pete Tong. If you wanted £200 from her on top, you should have suggested both putting £200 or more into a joint account each month to cover holidays etc.

She should not be contributing to repairs or major alterations to the property either.

I have always been in your shoes and not in hers, and I still side with her. That would be to cover my own backside.