Debt, debt and more debt.

AntoMac

Well Emma, one thing your life isn’t is dull! Plenty of ups and downs

I think that’s a real breakthrough your son reaching out to you. Was probably hard for him to do. I always think of the Harry Enfield Kevin and Perry teenager sketches. I used to think they were hilarious….. until my own daughter became a teenager! I can remember as a teenager being really stroppy with my Dad. I know now it was for absolutely no reason. He was the finest man I ever met and had nothing as a child, so understood the value of everything. I think the first time I told him how much I loved him was when he was on his death bed. 

I am sure your children will turn out fine. It’s an awkward stage in their lives and who better to take frustrations out on than the person who loves them unconditionally?

Nice that you visited the grave of an old friend. Maybe nice is the wrong word, but it was a good thing to do. I have friends gone way too young that I often think of too. 

Don’t ever be afraid to cry if you need to by the way
Keep riding those waves and keep spreading kindness, you’re doing amazingly well

Drawingaline

Well done on your son reaching out to you. I have two very different older children. The girl is a flapper who just descends into tears when she isn't coping, I try and offer practical help which is all rejected, she strops off and does it all herself 🙄

The boy is lazy and unmotivated. He applied for a college course but for obvious reasons hasn't been able to view the college or talk to any of the tutors. (He applied to another non academic course which he thought he would end up doing) did an online taster this week and is now all fired up and desperate to do it. Atm it is 50/5o whether he passes maths. He was capable of passing, just lazy and slapdash. If he doesn't pass maths he can't do the course. He needed the taster before his assesments!

Good luck to you ds

Queen_of_the_Hive

@Drawingaline I would say my son is a mixture between your daughter and your son. My son frets and is a worrier but equally the king of finding the easiest route out of anything! He's younger than your kids I think mine is the latter stages of primary but still can't do his shoe laces and will only do something if I say 'come on time to do x or y' so who knows where life will take him. 

@[Deleted User] I was reading your diary the other day on the bus home from town and I was pleased to hear about your progression into the unit. I know this is an outlay each month but this should help to separate your working life from home life and like you say help you to work out where you want your empire to go. I have a small unit too, but just as extra storage space, my home literally has no storage and its kept arguments 'at bay'. My partner has stuff that he can't part with and I have my own bit of that too so this works for us. Its actually full so I dread that time we have to empty it. Oh and love that the number of headboards are slowly reducing    

Queen_of_the_Hive

Hey @[Deleted User], not the greatest weekend for you. Not sure how I would have dealt with the situation with your tutor student and the ex, well what more can be said. You are in a better place now, just keep reminding yourself and keep smiling. When the chips are down I try to keep smiling to keep me going. 

Queen_of_the_Hive

[Deleted User] said:

Morning. Run done and now home, still packing up for the unit. Took the rings to the pawn shop and was offered £199. Both rings are platinum. The wedding ring has 1/4 carat of diamonds in it and the engagement ring has 1/2 carat. I can't get rid of them for this and so shall just put them away for when DD is old enough to have them. 
Crisis of confidence today with being self employed. I'm sure it will pass as quickly as it has arrived.
Have a lovely day. Hope the sun is shining where you are. It's not here. 
Oh! My running is becoming serious. I wore a pair of shorts this morning. I would have never have done that. Get me! 

I was about to say - don't sell the rings for that price. They are worth more in money than that. I'd shop around. I don't know much about pawn shops but a jewellery shop might be better. 

Keep doing your good stuff and brush those clouds away! Have a nice day and maybe not think too much about work. Its probably the extra pressure of paying for the unit now that's on your mind. I've had something similar with my partners work situation and having to 'borrow' from savings to pay for the basics atm. x 

CRANKY40

I sold my scrap gold (late MrC was a goldsmith before he did other things so there were bits hanging round) through Hatton Garden metals. You could maybe contact them and see if they'd offer more? It does say gold but if you look at the price list there's a section that says "other metals". 

dawnybabes

You need to value yourself more.  Stop giving so much,  

if your DD wants to go then make her earn the money.

WinterWarrior

It sounds like you need to do some straight talking Emma. Can you tell your sister the holiday isn’t doable just now due to your finances? She probably thought she was doing a kind thing, but if she doesn’t want to pay for dd then you can quite easily say no without causing offence. 

londoner2019

You're doing incredibly well - don't get too down on yourself. I have no dependents and it's challenging managing finances just for myself, so I'm always in awe of people having to keep different pots for children.

Keep going! And I echo other comments which say to be open and honest about things. Easier said than done, I get that - but people understand, and it's surprising how many people are in, or have been in, the same boat. They get it.

WinterWarrior

If they want her to go then I would let them pay. I don’t know if you follow Dave Ramsey, but he (and other money people) tend to say you shouldn’t keep up with the joneses. They may be knee deep in debt and just putting on a show, where as people who look like they have less might be secret millionaires. The trick is to have a plan and stick to it and not be dragged in to other people’s spending habits (unless you want to). 

Let them have a pity party, while you quietly get on with improving your situation and by not allowing them to waylay you.