Being charged double the dig money since boyfriend moved in

seashore22

So is she a relative or not? A relative has a particular meaning and I think it does make a difference to any obligation she may have towards you. Though i would say that it is a limited obligation as even a parent is fine to say to a grown child that it's time to fly the nest.

Whoever they are, it sounds like they have been incredibly generous towards you and I would be showing a bit more gratitude towards her or get my act together and move out. Long overdue it seems.

Humdinger1

I'd be careful about sitting her down and talking to her about money. It might come across as very entitled; her kindness firstly to you and then to your boyfriend doesn't give you the right to dictate how she manages her finances. No one can live for nothing as an adult, whatever terminology is used of rent vs bills. You could end up damaging the relationship. Keep us posted and good luck Humdinger

combeferret

gettingtheresometime wrote: »

OP will you be offering more money to cover the extra bills because of the double cooking?

We already ate separate food, and now my boyfriend eats meals with me so we're already cooking our own one separate meal, but if it was a cost increase I would happily take it on - she just won't divulge the actual cost to me frustratingly.

seashore22 wrote: »

So is she a relative or not? A relative has a particular meaning and I think it does make a difference to any obligation she may have towards you. Though i would say that it is a limited obligation as even a parent is fine to say to a grown child that it's time to fly the nest.

We aren't blood related but she's raised me as if I was her grandchild my whole life, her and my gran were best friends and she passed away when I was 5 - she doesn't have any living children of her own so I am her closest substitute.

Primrose

So you're cooking and eating some of your own meals and effectively treating the house as if it were your own.?
I think you are exceptionally fortunate somebody has helped you and now your boyfriend in this way but it,s time for you to stop playingthe impoverished youths and get your own place.
However this lady budgets, it,s her business so it's not for you to sit her down and give her a lecture on how she spend her money, or even the money you give her for your board and lodging.

As my mother used to say to me, "if you know of a better hole, go to it".

You may we'll be able to make savings but i think this sounds a reasonable deal and once you're out on your own you may be iN for a rude shock. All the ancillaries of living which you may not have budgeted for but which are included now my come back to bite you.

gettingtheresometime

combeferret wrote: »

We already ate separate food, and now my boyfriend eats meals with me so we're already cooking our own one separate meal, but if it was a cost increase I would happily take it on - she just won't divulge the actual cost to me frustratingly.

OP what, in an ideal world, do you see as the solution to this?


It sounds as if you both want the financial benefits of living with your Godmother but the flexibility of a house share.


Yes I can appreciate that what your Godmother wants to eat may not be what you prefer and are willing to buy your own food but it does sound as if you resent paying her the £544.


To honest the only way that I think the situation can resolve itself, & the relationship surviving is by you and your boyfriend moving out. Hopefully then, you'd realise what a good deal you had.

unholyangel

£250 including everything is incredibly cheap.

A friend lived with us for a while when looking for their own place after a relationship break down. Price he paid was to cover a share of the bills (although nothing towards the mortgage and we weren't making any sort of profit, actually a slight loss) & he had to buy his own food......he paid £240 a month.

Its common to think the grass is greener on the other side without ever having seen it up close.

£100+ a month for gas and electricity isn't out of the norm. One of my cousins was £20 a day in electricity when she was in a house with electric heaters. Myself, my gas bill dropped drastically when I upgraded our boiler.

You are also creating extra wear & tear on household items. It doesn't seem like much but £10 a month for a fridge/freezer, £15 a month for a tv, £25 a month for a kitchen (sans appliances) etc all adds up quickly.

You are getting an absolute bargain. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

Jox

Hi, your boyfriend was paying £450 a month previously but is now paying £250 so he can save £200 a month towards your next home.

I was living at home with my mum 15 years ago and paying her £400 a month and she wasn't money-saving which frustrated me so I moved out as I couldn't change how she was living in her own home.

Elinore

It maybe that she is double charging so you both don't get comfortable?

Having a two to one scenario against you - in your own home is never a good idea. That's why a number of room shares don't take couples it upsets the balance.

My lodger (who paid nigh on what both of you are paying combined for a mon/fri btw) partner started to stop over a few nights a week we noticed an increase in all our bills and we didn't share a food bill - so you are just going to have to take her word for it because it really makes a difference.

No good deed goes unpunished - so don't make her regret the lovely gesture of letting you both stay to sort out your debts and get some savings (being that its a reasonable sum for both of you to cover)

kazwookie

OP, get looking for a flat or what ever and move out ASAP.

Candyapple

If all the bills are split equally, why are you the only paying the £44 for Sky, especially since you said that you would get rid if it were up to you?

What is her reasoning for not allowing you both to buy your own food?