If I want to take the next step in life I need to make some big changes...

Hello...

Coming here with my tail between my legs a wee bit, as I'm still here, still in debt, after nearly 6 years (which is as many years as you CAN be in debt at my age). First time in the debt free diaries section however, as I feel it's time.

Ever since I was old enough to have a credit card, I've spent spent spent on it. Paid it down, and spent again. I have rather bad ADHD, and even with medication that doesn't stop me from impulsive spending when I want a shiny new toy.

For Christmas my partner and I bought a gaming PC. With the £600 we each paid, that wasn't bad at all, but I ended up spending about an extra £600 over the month on a new mic, webcam, fancy keyboard, mouse, chair... everything you could ever think of.

We live at home with my family and it's time for us to move into our own place this year, but I'm getting increasingly stressed by it all. We live in an expensive city, we both have fixed term jobs that end in June, I've had a 4 month period of sickness from work so I have no idea what work I will be able to do when I find a new one, and.... as always... the credit cards are STILL THERE.

We spent nearly £2,000 last year on my dearly departed cat due to some unexpected medical issues (I got him when I was a child, and by the time I was old enough to think for myself about insurance, he wouldn't have been covered for his conditions), which I don't begrudge a penny of, but obviously the debt is now higher than it was last year, as it ALWAYS seems to be.

Credit Cards are easily cut up though, but my biggest vice is takeaways. I spent about £1,800 last year on Just Eat alone. Makes me feel sick at the number.

Luckily I got my butt back into my matched betting last summer, and made about a grand, which helped pay some of the vet bills in cash, so I'm gonna try and push forward with that whilst it's still around.

I'm hoping that by keeping this diary that I'll feel some motivation from other members to finally help me out, so we can move out and not have to panic at the rental prices every time I look!
£-667 HSBC Credit Card
£-735 M&S Credit Card
£-3,526 Barclaycard Credit Card

Replies

  • Purplemumof2Purplemumof2 Forumite
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    Welcome back and good luck on your journey x
    Official DFW Nerd Club - Member no. 791 - Proud to be dealing with my debts
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  • combeferretcombeferret Forumite
    26 Posts
    Second Anniversary 10 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Argh!!! Between yesterday and today, two things have happened

    1. A tattoo artist I’ve had my eye on has a piece of work available, and without even thinking I emailed and booked a slot to get it for March. £100 deposit taken from money I had aside from my Matched Betting account and paid, and £400 more to pay on the day. Sigh. The only consolation I can give myself is that I won’t be paying with credit and can easily save up the cash by then.

    2. The flashes of being not well have hit me again, and I feel too dizzy to even stand. We have nothing in the house that doesn’t require cooking so if I want to get my energy up I’ll need to order something. Boyfriend wanted me to order food for him for when he gets home but I told him no, so it’ll be £11 to get me something to get my energy up, instead of the £20 we might’ve spent for a “nice takeaway.”

    Oh well. At least it’s all budgeted and accounted for in YNAB.
    £-667 HSBC Credit Card
    £-735 M&S Credit Card
    £-3,526 Barclaycard Credit Card
  • combeferretcombeferret Forumite
    26 Posts
    Second Anniversary 10 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    It’s fate! My order was cancelled with Just Eat, and my boyfriend is only about 30 mins from getting home so I’ll just wait for him to get back to help me get something to eat.
    £-667 HSBC Credit Card
    £-735 M&S Credit Card
    £-3,526 Barclaycard Credit Card
  • peliroccopelirocco Forumite
    8.2K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
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    Argh!!! Between yesterday and today, two things have happened

    1. A tattoo artist I’ve had my eye on has a piece of work available, and without even thinking I emailed and booked a slot to get it for March. £100 deposit taken from money I had aside from my Matched Betting account and paid, and £400 more to pay on the day. Sigh. The only consolation I can give myself is that I won’t be paying with credit and can easily save up the cash by then.

    2. The flashes of being not well have hit me again, and I feel too dizzy to even stand. We have nothing in the house that doesn’t require cooking so if I want to get my energy up I’ll need to order something. Boyfriend wanted me to order food for him for when he gets home but I told him no, so it’ll be £11 to get me something to get my energy up, instead of the £20 we might’ve spent for a “nice takeaway.”

    Oh well. At least it’s all budgeted and accounted for in YNAB.


    You havent had a light bulb moment and you are just making excuses to justify spending

    You would have to be in a serious state of starvation to have no energy due to lack of food
    Vuja De - the feeling you'll be here later
  • soon2b_debt3soon2b_debt3 Forumite
    15 Posts
    Seventh Anniversary 10 Posts Combo Breaker
    I used to spend a ridiculous amount of money on takeaways (around £300 in 6 months!) I've started batch cooking twice a week so I've always got something to warm up on the days when I can't be bothered to cook anything :)

    Also, it saves you a ton of money!
  • combeferretcombeferret Forumite
    26 Posts
    Second Anniversary 10 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    pelirocco said:

    You havent had a light bulb moment and you are just making excuses to justify spending

    You would have to be in a serious state of starvation to have no energy due to lack of food

    I'm not going to say you're wrong because you're absolutely not. However, in regards to the food, I take medication that can seriously mess with both my appetite and energy levels. The solution, of course, is to have food prepared in advance to avoid the temptation. I went shopping and have bought one of those massive bags of pasta for £2, and it's fantastic because any leftovers can be taken in for lunch at work so I haven't spent a penny in the canteen for a while now. Tonight, my bf and I are going to go through a whole year of Monzo statements to do an actual, proper budget. Not an aspirational budget, but ACTUALLY see what we've spent our money on. It's going to be horrifying but it needs done.
    £-667 HSBC Credit Card
    £-735 M&S Credit Card
    £-3,526 Barclaycard Credit Card
  • SeortySeorty Forumite
    1 Post
    First Post Photogenic
    MoneySaving Newbie
    Hello there. The occasionally mentioned boyfriend here! Everything my partner says here is accurate. I've lived independently for 3 years now but only started living financially smart 6 months ago. Through Monzo and YNAB I've managed to cut my spending per month from 2k to 600. 

    With the dreaded next step approaching however we both need to be much more smart and particular in our budget. I've got a lot more to learn so I hope you have lots of useful and honest advice for me as well as my partner.
  • combeferretcombeferret Forumite
    26 Posts
    Second Anniversary 10 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Sooooooo we both went through the entirety of 2019's bank statements to work out where we'd spent our money. It wasn't 100% accurate as it didn't account for costs we may have split after the fact... but... The average rough monthly spending said that I spent.... 
    over £850 per month on "entertainment".

    That figure made me feel physically sick and wow what a wake-up call. Some of it was on big purchases that I don't regret, but most of it? Was £10 on a game subscription here, £15 on a few drinks with friends there... so so insidious because those numbers don't seem like much when you spent them, but those totals don't lie.

    A major shift needs to happen. I always say "oh if I never bought another game again or had no TV I'd be fine, I have every piece of media I could ever consume stored on my PC." and yet...
    £-667 HSBC Credit Card
    £-735 M&S Credit Card
    £-3,526 Barclaycard Credit Card
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