Wading In Treacle

Silver_Queen

Fantastic news! You are doing amazingly. Can't believe you've already bagged a new job, go you!

catandy

we're down to the last 10£ in the bank account with the DD having gone out this morning and OH is asking me if we have money to put on the lottery - is he for real? The job he was looking at down the road is advertised online but the link to download the application form is broken so he may contact them next week and see if its still going - I could punch his face in at the moment :mad:

Ive gone over the job offers and I'm going with the more local one like I said yesterday and commission but the commission element kicks in quicker and it means that Im not spending hours travelling each way in the commute - ive been researching routes and ive got it down to 30 mins morning and evening

I go and sign the contract wed of next week with a view to starting the following week - 11th so I should pick up 3 weeks money from that job plus the weeks pay for the job I was doing at the end of March - 1550 I make it coming in. DD and spends for april stand at 880 that includes CT and water which start again so I should have a maximum of 600 I can throw at the credit cards which will be around 1k and will be charging interest.


credit cards are going to take me until June to clear in their entirety - OH doesnt know and will only kick off about it so Im not even having that conversation.


and now I need to finish this post because he is getting suspicious with me on my laptop typing all the time - I feel like im going to explode with all this going on

catandy

ive just told OH that there is no spend on lottery or anything else till things settle down and I am back in secure work with a regular income which will probably be two pay checks into the new job - end of april into may. to say hes not happy is an understatement.

neither am I but thats life chum...

catandy

major breakdown last night when this all became too much - OH and I went over all the figures for everything and eventually put a plan of action in place, not before I was told that if it wasnt for him and his credit cards I would be homeless and destitute at the moment - to which I finally snapped and said that if I hadn't kept him for the last x amount of years I wouldn't be in this situation. I think long term we are breaking up and I think that is the best thing that can happen for both of us.

anyway immediate plan of action is:-

living expenses and the rest of the bills this month go onto the OH credit card. that should be about 1200 max by the end of the month when I get paid 1550. I pay off the credit cards in full to save any interest being due. April hopefully just rent/ groceries and petrol go onto the CC to be paid off in full May - that puts me back on an even keel and able to cover all the bills from the bank account moving forward - and rent account meaning I wont be so stressed about that all the time.


DMP I havent even thought about for now - the next couple of months its project keep my head above water till I can get everything back into regular payments then its look at OH moving out or staying or whatever happens.


My youngest son is coming home for a week in April - he lives in Portugal and I havent seen him for a year so I'm looking forward to that and will enjoy having someone to talk to. That is the only thing I have at the moment to hold onto and look forward to so I'm counting down the days until I see him

in_need_of_direction

Sorry to hear things have been testy but you now have a plan. Glad to hear you’ll see your son soon but if it were mine, I wouldn’t bank on having someone to talk to. He tends to get picked up, eats, sleeps and socialises then goes back.

GlendaSugarbean

You sound very determined . This is all fixable, but you can only fix your own stuff and not your OH. Once the CC is paid off, can you start squirrelling away a 'get outta here' fund?

catandy

GlendaSugarbean wrote: »

You sound very determined . This is all fixable, but you can only fix your own stuff and not your OH. Once the CC is paid off, can you start squirrelling away a 'get outta here' fund?

exactly my thinking as well - build an emergency fund and also put together a rebuild my life pot. at least then ive got some options at the moment im stuck and so is he.

catandy

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

Sorry to hear things have been testy but you now have a plan. Glad to hear you’ll see your son soon but if it were mine, I wouldn’t bank on having someone to talk to. He tends to get picked up, eats, sleeps and socialises then goes back.

yep that sounds exactly like the last visit - he grunted at me in the car when I was collecting him from the airport and that was the best conversation of the whole visit - even so still cant wait to see him

triple_choc_chip

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

Sorry to hear things have been testy but you now have a plan. Glad to hear you’ll see your son soon but if it were mine, I wouldn’t bank on having someone to talk to. He tends to get picked up, eats, sleeps and socialises then goes back.

I think we’re sharing the same one! Plus several loads of washing as a gift for the laundry fairy aka me!

Catandy, pretty sure you know this already, but the only way his credit cards would be doing you any favours is if he were making the payments on them to [STRIKE]help you[/STRIKE] make a contribution. I’m also keeping many thoughts to myself because we’re not here to judge and this is about debt, [STRIKE]but everyone on mumsnet would be replying with LTB right now.[/STRIKE]

catandy

triple_choc_chip wrote: »

I think we’re sharing the same one! Plus several loads of washing as a gift for the laundry fairy aka me!

Catandy, pretty sure you know this already, but the only way his credit cards would be doing you any favours is if he were making the payments on them to [STRIKE]help you[/STRIKE] make a contribution. I’m also keeping many thoughts to myself because we’re not here to judge and this is about debt, [STRIKE]but everyone on mumsnet would be replying with LTB right now.[/STRIKE]

ive worked out that he will never help and im running out of patience to keep him forever so things are coming to a head and a resolution. it has only carried on this long because ive just got on with it and managed to move from job to job as they came to an end and not even put my head above the parapet - cannot and will not do it any more - I think I may actually be finding a backbone!