Not the highway code

ciderboy2009

When parking on double yellow lines in-between two or more other vehicles who are also parked on double lines then you must always put on your hazard lights. Other drivers will know that you're not indicating to pull out by using their psychic powers.

When you are ready to pull out from this parking space then turn off your hazard lights, turn your steering wheel fully in the direction you need to go and pull out. Any cars coming along the road must let you out.

oldagetraveller

Never drive with two hands on the steering wheel. Complete control of your vehicle may only be achieved with one hand at the 12 o'clock position and the other resting on the gearchange and or centre console.

Mr.Generous

oldagetraveller wrote: »

Never drive with two hands on the steering wheel. Complete control of your vehicle may only be achieved with one hand at the 12 o'clock position and the other resting on the gearchange and or centre console.

Or to update your facebook status on your smartphone.

DaftyDuck

Reversing lights give you priority over everything; moving, stationary, whether on or off the highway. They also ensure you clip the kerb on a corner, but prevent damage to your paintwork, wheeltrim, mirrors.... Any bin or lamppost that ignored your clear signal deserves what it got.

Horns are not to be used after dusk, unless you recognise the pedestrian over there. Beep more if you haven't seen them for yonks.

Foglights are mandatory at all times. Except in fog. Obviously!

Jackmydad

Fail to observe at all times. Be especially careless when pulling out to overtake. Be sure to use your smart phone whenever possible
Remember: do not drive defensively. You must not lose the game at any cost.

[Deleted User]

One from experience yesterday...

Whilst waiting at a red light to turn right into a supermarket, don't wait for the green light, just pull out when there's a slight gap and cut across oncoming rush hour traffic

Ganga

Great reading people keep it up

walwyn1978

Remember, all that leather and a helmet that bikers wear makes them superhuman and invincible. You can therefore drive really close to them and not give them any room.

A really good driver drives everywhere at the same speed. Don’t worry about going from A roads to urban settings then onto a fast dual carriageway- staying at the same speed at all times allows for other road users to appreciate your driving ability.

Covering your car in a load of aftermarket accessories not only makes it go 16.5% faster but also makes you significantly more attractive to your partner of choice.

[Deleted User]

No need to wait for a gap at a roundabout, just pull out when you feel like it and people can do their best to avoid colliding with you

walwyn1978

One more: when collecting your child from school it is accepted that none of the Highway Code or laws of the land apply and you can do what you want because Little Johnny is the only one that matters.

This is doubly important if you live within 1000 yards of the school in question.