I will cut my coat according to my cloth. {Edited by Forum team} 2019

Savvy_sewing

elisamoose wrote: »

I am confused ......where are his children if he is at work until midnight or does not come home and you are at your mums?

With her. Last Friday the court gave her 50/50 custody until the next plo meeting.

hb2

Mooloo, I'm glad that you had a good day with your mum and then a nice chat with your siblings

I agree that it is unusual for 2 tyres to blow out - but still think that is more likely than them having been tampered with.

The Bank of Mum seems to be taking a big hit again at the moment. I know that some of it has been unavoidable but please keep a close eye so that it does not spiral out of control again.

Savvy_sewing

I don't feel that I have had much choice at the moment.
I have spoken to him this afternoon and told him again that he needed to sort out the bank, and the budget, and all the things he has debts to deal with.
I will be reminding him again when he finally gets home.
I am tired today, late night crisis do not help.
So I treated myself to sausage and chips from the shop on the way home, and now I am going to take my final cup of tea into the bath!
When vitalised ( hopefully), I will have the energy to put all the dry washing away, as it's all over my bed, I have no choice but to put it all away really.

dreaming

Hi Mooloo - sorry to hear life is still so stressful for you. I know that DS needs to get his btm in gear and sort things out but I wonder if he is just overwhelmed by it all (understandably I think). I know my eldest got very stressed out by "talking" and being given a long list of things to do. Since her ASD diagnosis she has been able to explain that 10-15 minutes of talking is about all she can take in at one time. After that her brain seems to switch off and she forgets everything that was said. I have now learned that better results are achieved if I bear this in mind so limit the talking to 10 minutes and only give her one thing to do at a time. I find things get done better this way. I know DS doesn't have a diagnosis of ASD but I vaguely recall you thought he might be (apologies if I'm wrong). Anyway the procedure would still work for a lot of people. I know it is frustrating when you are very much a "let's get this sorted now" type of person (as am I), and I know there is a lot to sort out, but maybe by breaking it down into smaller increments he might cope better and not "go walkabout". I also find eldest takes things in better if we are doing something together like washing up, for example - I think it is less intimidating. Anyway I hope things are resolved as soon as possible - all the best.

Savvy_sewing

Home alone, and I should be enjoying it. But I don't.
Dgd is coming home today. I am working this morning and will probably bring work home to do either tonight or tomorrow afternoon. If the children are away it will be possible to sew in the front room. DS can sleep in the boys bed tonight if he bothers to come home after work.
He is spending a lot of time with another family with children as far as I can see.
I feel like I have been through a steamroller at the moment and there is masses of work to be done at the shop.
My bath did help me relax and I was in bed just after 10pm. Although I was up in the night, I did manage to sleep and get back reasonably quickly.
Here is to better days ahead.

hb2

Mooloo, 'Dreaming' has a point. We learned that my son had very poor short-term memory and needs to be given one instruction at a time. In fact, I know that the same applies to me - for example when asking directions - my eyes glaze over and I get lost after one instruction (even though I actually have a very good short-term memory!). Maybe your son is overwhelmed by having so many things to deal with and would cope better with being given just one thing to do at a time?

I'm glad your bath helped you relax last night and hope you can get some down-time over the long weekend.

Savvy_sewing

Dgd is home, life as we knew it is slowly returning.
DS is not around much as he's working this weekend. I briefly saw him yesterday when he took some garden chairs across to my Mum for me.
My friend popped round yesterday evening and we had pizza etc for tea, and the kids were on Xbox.
I have managed to sort out a couple of men's suits that were too small on the waistcoat by adding a stripe down the sides, letting the trousers out by 2" and shortening them yesterday, as the suits came incorrectly and the wedding is at the weekend. Happy to have been able to help and take the stress out of their day.
Today I have done several fittings, and am about to do a bride whose wedding is soon, and this morning she had a fitting somewhere else and they basically told her to wear higher shoes, her sisters dresses are here with me, so her Mum contacted me in tears, and I have assured her that she can come here, ( a couple of hours away), and I will wait for her and do her fitting when she can get here, and not to panic.
So I seem to be able to keep a cool head, make people feel better and sort out their problems easily. I wish I could do the same for myself.
I am looking forward to taking some time off this afternoon and enjoy the sunshine, and will do some work tonight, as the kids are not back until tomorrow after 12.
The exgf is bombarding DS with calls and messages, and he is getting fed up.
Yesterday afternoon she said that he had to take one of the children to the hospital at 7pm as he had been stung on the hand.
Erm No.
Remove the sting, treat with a cold compress. Take piriton possibly if there is a mild reaction. If he was in anaphylactic shock or something then she should call the paramedics. If she wants custody of the children then when they are in her care it is up to her and her family to do things. Why wait from 3pm till 7pm? Oh yes as DS starts work at 7pm so he would loose his wages, at best and loose his job at worst.
Now she's demanding changes to the contact collection time and place set by the court. No, although if it helps he has offered to collect them from the house, as she said she can't afford to get to the collection point.
She has asked Biggest to have the children while she does an intensive driving course. Said DS wouldn't do it. But she didn't ask him to cover an intensive course, she asked for him to have them while she has a driving lesson, ( which she was planning to have at a time when DS was working!
She should be having lessons when she doesn't have the children in her care. Ofcourse DS will have them if she is on a course, and I would babysit when he is at work, but to expect him to not work at the drop off her hat, is a noway. She's trying to be awkward.
The tyre fitter couldn't say for definite that the tyres were tampered with, but he also thought it very unusual for two to go at the same time.

I think I am getting very cynical about things now.

Savvy_sewing

Sitting in the garden with a glass of water. Sun cream on. My lawn mower is battery, so only lasts 30 minutes and dies. So I have done my allotted time and it's back on Charge. Dgd doesn't want to seethe lifht of day. DS has gone out and probably won't be back before he gets the children. Not thrilled because he has only just told me his hours have been moved forward from 6pm start to 3pm start. So that means I am left doing the children and that will mean I will be too tired to do my sewing this evening.
My dilemma is I could set up now, and do an hours worth, but it all needs packing away before little fingers arrive, or I can enjoy the sun and worry about working tomorrow!
Except writing that down I realise that the children will be in my care again tomorrow as DS has extra work being a bank holiday and great weather.
So looks like I am headed back inside to work now after all!
Or if I leave it I will be stressed at all the work I have to do as it's very busy at work. I am still playing catch up from my little trip .

Savvy_sewing

So I did a few alterations until the children came back.
We have been out in the garden for quite a while, but I came in about 3.45 as it was too hot out there.
Dgs is watching Thomas the tank engine and the baby has fallen asleep on the sofa. All that fresh air.
Dgd has gone out with her friends at last. Glad she's not on the Xbox on such a good day.
Just cooking pasta and bolognese ready for the kids . Not sure if I will have any as I had a salad at lunchtime.

hb2

Mooloo, I hope you were able to do enough work to keep the guilt monster at bay! I'm sorry that you are doing rather more child-sitting than you had anticipated

It is another glorious day here. Son is home for the weekend so we (son, OH and I) went out and had lunch by the sea