I am so hurt and confused

pollypenny

OP, you said that most of his friends had settled down. Maybe he felt that it was the expected next step for him. Sadly, when the crunch came he was not ready for that.

Let him go and miss you maybe.

Kynthia

It's brutal and confusing but you need to accept you'll probably never know why. The thing is he probably doesnt know himself and if you press him he'll try to come up with a reason but it probably won't be the truth. This will hurt and confuse you more as you analyse it and keep feeling it doesn't make sense, so go back to ask him again and so on. The best thing to do is grieve, rely on your friends and family, keep busy and try to get on with your life.

SandraX

People are rarely prepared to be dumped and it's a shock even to those that are very confident.

Most of the time when someone leaves their OH and say they don't have someone else, sadly they
do and lie to protect you in their warped way, or hedge their bets just in case it does not work out.

A recent trend in the tabloids anyway is men leaving their lady OH for a bloke.

Whatever happens Katie, you have done nothing wrong and if someone wants to take pleasure out of your situation, never forget that it may be happening to them.

Talking helps especially on forums where people dont really know you.

Again, you have done nothing wrong whatever the outcome so chin up and please try to carry on with work life and maybe tell mum/dad/siblings (they usually care ina genuine way and won't blabber) but no one else ATM, but your choice.

You are a young and nice lady and one that is honest, and you can't beat, slap down a decent, honest person.

I feel for you and just hope your coward OH/ex has the guts to tell you the truth and you can begin to draw a line under it.


You have done nothing wrong, trust me.
x

katiekittykat

pollypenny wrote: »

OP, you said that most of his friends had settled down. Maybe he felt that it was the expected next step for him. Sadly, when the crunch came he was not ready for that.

Let him go and miss you maybe.

Yeah his brother his married, is mate gets married in March and his other nest mate has just moved in with his girlfriend

He asked me to move in ages ago, I even have a key (which he hasn't asked to have back)

A few weeks before he was buying me stuff for the house when I move in.

Maybe it is cold feet, who knows.

I haven't contacted him since, maybe he will miss me time will tell I guess

If he wasn't ready for that, then that would of been OK could of been dealt with in a talk couldn't it really

katiekittykat

SandraX wrote: »

People are rarely prepared to be dumped and it's a shock even to those that are very confident.

Most of the time when someone leaves their OH and say they don't have someone else, sadly they
do and lie to protect you in their warped way, or hedge their bets just in case it does not work out.

A recent trend in the tabloids anyway is men leaving their lady OH for a bloke.

Whatever happens Katie, you have done nothing wrong and if someone wants to take pleasure out of your situation, never forget that it may be happening to them.

Talking helps especially on forums where people dont really know you.

Again, you have done nothing wrong whatever the outcome so chin up and please try to carry on with work life and maybe tell mum/dad/siblings (they usually care ina genuine way and won't blabber) but no one else ATM, but your choice.

You are a young and nice lady and one that is honest, and you can't beat, slap down a decent, honest person.

I feel for you and just hope your coward OH/ex has the guts to tell you the truth and you can begin to draw a line under it.


You have done nothing wrong, trust me.
x

Thank you so much.

I guess if there is someone else the truth will out in the end.

In my head you don't just admit you are making a massive mistake and still walk away, but then men are wired differently.

I am just at a loss and feel so helpless but then I feel pathetic for feeling this way.

I have millions of imaginary situations going on in my head which is just making me even more anxious.

He says I was a perfect girlfriend, best thing that ever happened to him but I am still sat her asking if that is the case then why wasn't that enough and what did I do wrong?

I am 35, he is 30.

I hope he does too at least then it might make it easier for me to process

I am so confused sorry for rambling xx

chelseablue

30 seems to be a 'funny' age for men

My husband will be 30 in July and he's already saying about how he'll be old after turning 30 and mourning the loss of his 20's

I'm 35 so I must be ancient :rotfl:

katiekittykat

chelseablue wrote: »

30 seems to be a 'funny' age for men

My husband will be 30 in July and he's already saying about how he'll be old after turning 30 and mourning the loss of his 20's

I'm 35 so I must be ancient :rotfl:

ha ha same here

We had 3 weeks in vegas for his 30th so i just thought he was like some sort of downer after that

Comms69

Not been mentioned I don't think.


Kids? Do you want them, does he? Is this something which you've discussed?

ManofLeisure_2

Might sound harsh Katie, but it's probably time to move forward with your life. This chap doesn't deserve you, but in time, you will find someone who does.

katiekittykat

Comms69 wrote: »

Not been mentioned I don't think.


Kids? Do you want them, does he? Is this something which you've discussed?

We discussed very early on, I had a really bad health condition which means I have been sterilized.

We discussed this in depth at the time and we both agreed we didn't want children.

I did however if we got years down the line and he changed his mind I would re consider for him