Medical Expenses: Brother Very Ill in Thailand

gilett

Pollycat wrote: »

I'm curious why you want to bang on about showing compassion when the OP clearly said pages ago that they won't sign the paper, have told the FO not to contact them again and to find a new nok.
I find that quite patronising.

You're not feeling the love because there isn't any.
And hasn't been for 20 years.

I think I mentioned the word compassion once in the whole thread. Hardly banging on. But as you were dear....

gilett

Sunny_Intervals wrote: »

It's the concept of having no line that someone can cross that I find alien. It reminds me of that religious thing about how everyone can be forgiven...well, no, some people can't and shouldn't be forgiven. If my family member was, say, overly fond of children, or abused their spouse, or went on a shooting spree, I wouldn't be rushing to their side just because we're related. I find that morally abhorrent.


I believe in being compassionate and forgiving toward those who deserve it. As far as I can see, the OP's brother has done nothing at all to deserve it.

I might be wrong but I don't recall anyone saying everyone can or should be forgiven. Like I said, it's an alternative view. And it's got you all talking. Seems a contentious area for a lot of people.

gilett

Sunny_Intervals wrote: »

I don't want to shut you down, I just want to understand your thought process. I've genuinely never met someone who would forgive literally anything, even if it was against their own morals. (I'm assuming you would forgive literally anything, because you don't seem to want to confirm one way or the other, unless I've missed it in one of your edits.)

Precisely, you're assuming. I've never said or even implied that I'd forgive literally anything, as you know. I've not actually elaborated. I've just offered an alternative view and been shot down by several of you, told I don't know what I'm talking about and various assumptions made about me because I didn't agree with the majority. I find it a bit odd. Almost pack mentality to stut people down ASAP.

gilett

Sunny_Intervals wrote: »

The assumption is based on the fact that you keep calling everyone cold and callous for having a point at which they wouldn't help family.

If you did have a line, then essentially you agree with us that blood isn't the most important thing, which then begs the question, "Why you keep calling us cold and callous for simply stating something that you agree with?"


So either you have no line despite the moral implications, or you do have a line and you're being a hypocrite.

Another assumption. I don't keep 'calling' people cold and callous. I keep saying I 'find it' cold and callous, because I do. Do you see the difference there? It's a viewpoint, not a fact. Another difference.

silvercar

gilett wrote: »

Well I think dying in a foreign jail knowing your family don't want to know can't be a very nice way to end your life for anyone. Nobody deserves tha surely. Like I said it would weigh on my conscience heavily if I had been the one who turned the other cheek in his last days. It all seems rather cold to me and I couldn't do it regardless of past bitterness. I would find it inhuman.

I agree.

Pollycat wrote: »

The brother made his choice 20 years ago.
I think he does deserve it.
You can say it's cold.
You can say it's callous.
If I was in the OP's situation, I really wouldn't care what you called it or what you thought.

It's cold and callous. It may be justified, but it is still cold and callous.

The brother is calling you because he is in desperate need, basically you could well be the only person he can call in spite of not speaking for 20 years.

gilett

silvercar wrote: »

I agree.



It's cold and callous. It may be justified, but it is still cold and callous.

The brother is calling you because he is in desperate need, basically you could well be the only person he can call in spite of not speaking for 20 years.

Thank christ. At last.

gilett

Sunny_Intervals wrote: »

No, I don't see the difference at all. I guess that's something else we'll have to disagree on.

That's because you don't want to see the difference, even though you know it's there. Throughout this thread I have said repeatedly it 'seems, or I' find'. I have not stated anything as fact.

Red-Squirrel_2

gilett wrote: »

.... Then of course there's the small matter of repatriation of his body once its all over. Someone's going to have to pay for that.

What makes you think that?

missprice

silvercar wrote: »

I agree.



It's cold and callous. It may be justified, but it is still cold and callous.

The brother is calling you because he is in desperate need, basically you could well be the only person he can call in spite of not speaking for 20 years.

The brother is not calling though, the foreign office is sending letters in a different language, yet to be translated but most likely demanding money for health care.

Adding to this, in 20 years in another country, the brother made not one friend, saved not one penny, gave no thought as to what would happen later in life. And now (possibly) wants a sibling to just up and help.
Nah mate

gilett

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

What makes you think that?

Just a hunch.