Elderly Mother - Showing signs of Dementia - What to do?

changing_ways

You might have already found the information you were looking for a few weeks ago but if not, Age Scotland has detailed clear factsheets on care home funding etc. https://www.ageuk.org.uk/scotland/information-advice/care-and-support/care-homes/  
https://www.ageuk.org.uk/scotland/information-advice/legal-and-family-issues/power-of-attorney-and-mental-capacity/

badmemory

Do not believe anything a social worker tells you.  In circumstances like these they lie through their teeth.  Just one lie, she had to go in the care home THEY chose despite the fact that she was self funding from day one.

BrassicWoman

Tammer said:

Hi, yes I am based in Scotland.  I think you are right. I don't think I will progress the guardianship and instead will put the onus back to the hospital and social work team. 

worked for me.

QuackQuackOops

We found something that pinpointed a family members condition.......sounds similar.
It's called Senile Squalor Syndrome.
Hordeing.....incontinence......part of it.

Tammer

Hi,
Thanks for the above. The Age Uk links were really useful in particular.
A few things have been happening recently.  The hospital my Mum is in need the bed as they are making space for COVID 19 patients.  They are planning to move her to a care home temporarily, with my mum paying for it, until a permanent care home can be found.  The Social Worker provided details and also lists of care homes and vacancies at present, together with some other information.    I noted that some care homes have people in them with COVID 19 and some don't.  The care home that the hospital is planning to transfer my mum to has people with COVID 19(!).    I phoned the care home and they were helpful, but wouldn't say anything about their COVID 19 cases which didn't fill me with confidence.


I have said that, as the POA requires me to make decisions that benefit my mum, I cannot agree to her going to a care home with COVID 19 cases.  I think this has stopped her moving temporarily.   I feel really strongly about this and, I know this is extreme, but feel putting my mum in a care home with COVID 19 is tantamount to attempted murder.  I could not look my brother or uncle in the eye if I did this. 

I will try to find a place at a care home with no COVID 19 and will try to get help from the Social Work team in finding one.   I just thought I should leave a note her to let people know what is happening here. 

Savvy_Sue

Tammer said:

The hospital my Mum is in need the bed as they are making space for COVID 19 patients.  They are planning to move her to a care home temporarily, with my mum paying for it, until a permanent care home can be found.  

I thought there was an initial disregard period when someone moved into a care home? 

Tammer

Savvy_Sue said:

I thought there was an initial disregard period when someone moved into a care home? 

That's a good point.  I will need to re-read the "paying for care" leaflet.

noclaf

Please don't take this as fact but just as an fyi, I wanted to apply for PoA for my mum but was told as she "lacked" mental capacity (Dementia) I had to go  down the Deputyship route instead and that was the only option I had available.I mention this as it can take significantly longer to be completed than PoA..it took 8 months for my mother's deputyship to be granted and that was without any hold-up's on my end or issues with family disagreeing etc I think this is mainly due to how quickly the court of protection(or whatever its called now) can process applications as imagine they could have lots to get through and current situation with Covid won't help.

elsien

Just a couple of things to consider:
It isn't really possible to judge whether care homes have covid-19 because of the lack of testing until people get to hospital so no current cases isn't a guaranteed all clear, whereas the hospital definitely has them.
I also know a care home unit which had a couple of cases which now appears to be clear.  It depends on how it's being managed and how well people can be separated. 
I do understand your concerns but it's not  as clear cut as covid/no covid. 

poppy10_2

Tammer said:

as the POA requires me to make decisions that benefit my mum, I cannot agree to her going to a care home with COVID 19 cases.

They don't need your agreement. Even if she was capacitous to make her own decisions they wouldn't need her agreement either. Under the Coronavirus Act several provisions of the Care Act have been suspended. Once medically fit for discharge she needs to leave the ward - that can be to a care home if she'll go, if she or you don't agree then she'll need to leave the ward regardless and make your own arrangements for what to do about her care needs.