Boyfriend moving in... how much should he pay?

Mojisola

phryne wrote: »

Alarm bells are ringing, from what you've written. £145 a month, no rent, and girlfriend doing all his cooking and cleaning? No wonder he's keen I think I would be, too

Where does Tink say this will be the way the household will be organised?

Tink21_2

Thanks all! Yes I see your point regarding the saving account, seems fair that it be only in his name.

He is in the army at the moment, but leaves next month. But when he comes home he often stays for weeks at a time and I will say he does his fair share of cooking and cleaning. We also share the cost of groceries and nights out.

I am not keen to involve solicitors. I want to be sensible and protect my investment however, I also love my boyfriend and want us to build a future together and that’s what it’s all about right? ��

At the moment I’m thinking the best way to do both is to ask he pay half the bills, does his fair share around the house and pays into a savings account to put money towards a joint investment in the future.

LadyDee

Who is going to buy all the groceries, household items etc? Sorry, I think this has disaster written all over it. No wonder the boyfriend is keen to move in - £145 per month? Wish I could live for £145 per month. With two people, the bills will be higher, who will pay the phone bill, repairs, etc., etc. insurance premiums, all those little things.

mgdavid

Mojisola wrote: »

Where does Tink say this will be the way the household will be organised?

why did you not also highlight the question mark at the end of the bit quoted? When included it perhaps makes your question unnecessary.

onomatopoeia99

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

The house is your asset alone, as it stands only you benefit from your investment in it if it increases in value.

If your boyfriend pays anything towards the investment, towards increasing the value of the house such as paying capital off the mortgage or paying for repairs and improvements, then he has his money invested in the asset too and builds up what is called a ‘beneficial interest’, google it.

Provided there is a common intent that this interest would be created. People on here always seem to leave that bit out.

Tink21_2

Thanks LadyDee, this is where I get a little confused on the best thing to do here. It is a sweet deal for him I agree lol! I am someone who likes to prepare for the worst but hope for the best!

Red-Squirrel_2

LadyDee wrote: »

Who is going to buy all the groceries, household items etc? Sorry, I think this has disaster written all over it. No wonder the boyfriend is keen to move in - £145 per month? Wish I could live for £145 per month. With two people, the bills will be higher, who will pay the phone bill, repairs, etc., etc. insurance premiums, all those little things.

From his POV, would you pay toward the mortgage for a house you could be kicked out of with literally no notice? Would you be happy to be contributing exactly the same to an asset as your partner when only they owned it and you had no rights over it at all?

I’m sure they can come to an arrangement whereby he isn’t any better off than she is and contributes equally to the relationship. If he puts the same amount as the mortgage payment into savings each month that will benefit them both if all goes to plan.

dawyldthing

The other thing is when you do move in together I certainly wouldn’t be putting £60k deposit down if he’s not doing the same. You’ve got to think that say you split up a year later he’ll get £30k for nothing. Don’t let your heart rule your head.

Atm I’d split all bills half and ask him to put what he would pay the mortgage into savings.

If you aren’t on the same page now I certainly wouldn’t risk any money going forwards. Relationships come and relationships go (I’ve seen it too often), protect your money

Tink21_2

I was thinking that when we buy our own place together that we could get a legal agreement written up that states should we part we would both get back what we invested intially and then split the equity?

phryne

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

From his POV, would you pay toward the mortgage for a house you could be kicked out of with literally no notice? Would you be happy to be contributing exactly the same to an asset as your partner when only they owned it and you had no rights over it at all?

I’m sure they can come to an arrangement whereby he isn’t any better off than she is and contributes equally to the relationship. If he puts the same amount as the mortgage payment into savings each month that will benefit them both if all goes to plan.

In which case why not get a job on civvy street when he leaves the army next month, and buy or rent his own place for a while, and save up for a house?

Or would he be mad to do that, given that he's got an all-in offer of £145 a month