Back to try again..

jwil

Happy New Year from me too. Hope things are settling down xx

Robin09

Hi everyone and thank you for the messages. Belated Happy New Year to you all. I am still around reading all the diaries but haven't really known what to say on here.

Things are still up in the air. DS got into quite a bit of trouble and we are still waiting for an outcome. I am absolutely exhausted and not feeling great. I jump everytime the phone rings and feel very on edge.

Over the years since DS's mental health problems started, we have tried so hard to get him help. Various meetings, appointments, school involvement and paying for private therapy but nothing has seemed to help. When we found out what had happened (very cryptic I know) everything started to make more sense and it was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders and he seemed to be doing well for a while. He was in school everyday and catching up on his work and seeing friends again. Then there was more exams and his anxiety went through the roof again. He spent 3 whole days crying in bed. It's his GCSE year and I just don't know how we can help him when he doesn't want to help himself. I feel myself in a constant wave of panic of what will happen every day.

Money wise, we are still paying our token payments to the debt and I haven't given it much thought other than that. Would like to start a F&F pot but not happened yet. But finally started to rebuild some of the other savings pots after they were wiped out last year. Downloaded a free spending tracker app which is helping loads.

X

mark55man

Welcome back. Sorry it's so dreadful for you at the moment but sometimes it just is and for longer than you might imagine. But there is always a hope and children do change as they up and usually for the better.

Good luck and don't be shy about dumping your worries here - better out than in

WelshKitty85

Sorry you're having such a tough time robin x

Robin09

Thank you!

I am really trying hard each day to focus on the good stuff and not just the doom and gloom. I start to feel ungrateful and that really annoys me as I know we have lots to be grateful for. He is having more good days than bad lately, which I keep reminding myself of. One problem is that I'm finding it harder myself to cope with his bad days and even on his good days, I'm still worrying.

DD is doing good, only so much you can explain to a 7yo but she's a smart girl so is aware things are harder for him. She has joined choir at a local village, which she loves.

Today, I didn't have work and I made excuses as to why I didn't need to go out and stayed at home with nothing to do. Even with DH and my best friend trying to encourage me to go out. I need to stop hiding away now!

mark55man

That's more positive than I think you realise. My experience is that trends do last in whatever direction they are - even a relapse can be coped with although sets you back. What's worse is when everything seems to stay the same - please note that even though he won't say your DS will be so grateful for your support

jwil

Lovely to hear from you. Although it's DS's GCSE year, if he doesn't get them this year, he can go back and do them any time once his mental health improves. It won't be the end of the world. One thing that helped me at that age was realising that I only needed to get half the questions right to get a pass (I don't know if the grade boundaries are the same now), but it took some of the pressure off.

You've got a lot going on and it's not surprising you are feeling stressed and anxious. Take care of yourself too - maybe it's worth a visit to your GP. xx

Starmummy

Oh Robin, It's lovely to hear from you.

I'm really sorry things are such a struggle right now, you do sound so measured and strong though, you are doing so well lovely.

Keep looking at the positives, have downtime when you can get it...your husband and friend are right on one thing though, please do try to get outside every day it will do wonders for your own mental wellbeing

x

Robin09

Thank you all again!

Had work today so that was a distraction and then popped to see best friend as she can always cheer me up. Went out for a walk, which was nice and much needed. Had a few messages off the school, sure my heart skips a beat everytime I see the number now but was just standard messages about revision/booster lessons.

Also had a phone call though off a new organisation that DS has to have appointments with due to the trouble he got in. Should have his first one next month but not local at all, but it is what it is. They also said it may cost £80 per session but it may be waived because of his age. He needs to go though and he is willing to, so again will deal with that if needs be.

DD came straight home from school and got her pottery wheel out, one of her favourite Christmas presents she got given by my boss will need to buy her some more clay as she's nearly out. My sister turned up then so wanted a go as well.

Spends today was £5 into a savers club at DD's school. Saving this for the summer holidays for some days out and her new uniform etc. So far have £70 in there.

Since the the beginning of the month I also made a savings chart for a holiday. We need a break for sure. Have got £255 put by so far from selling stuff. The visual is great and DD loves to colour in each line when we put more in.

BalanceBy50

Lovely to see you back Robin but so sorry to hear about DS.

Sending lots of love xx