It's Complicated

Mummy2cheekymonkeys

How is everything going? Are you still enjoying your new found freedom? Has he backed off yet?

last_mile

It!!!8217;s weird to think that this thread is over a month old now and how much has changed. I!!!8217;m still at my parents and told is the 1st day since the weekend I left where I have had 0 contact.
Not because he has finally listen but because he!!!8217;s annoyed at me.
We had a mutual friends leaving night on Saturday, he asked about attending together and I said no that I was alright going to be out on the town with my girlfriends during the day but we would be doing dinner around 5:30 before heading over.
I know I shouldn!!!8217;t have invited him but I just wanted to see if he!!!8217;d changed ( he hadn!!!8217;t).
Got angry with me because my very straight forward direction to the restaurant confused him.
Never bothered to greet or speak to my friends at all, was annoyed if wasnt just the 2 of us as he wanted to !!!8220;reconnect!!!8221; as a couple. And then ruined the whole night by being moody about it all, calling my friends poisonous and accusing them of turning me against him.
So the decision is made, it!!!8217;s properly over and I am now making arrangements as such.

Primrose

Good!
He has pushed to the point where you have finally seen the light. No matter how much other people tried to persuade you to make this move, it could really only happen when he pushed you to the absolute limit and you truly realised nothing would ever change.

I think you are finally at this point now without any self doubt which is where you need to be to be able to move confidently forward knowing 100% that you are doing the right thing. Now you have a much better chance of making your new independent life successful

Smodlet

So far, so surprised. Well done, last mile. You have control; you just needed to realise it. For whatever it is worth, we are still here. The power is yours.

Smodlet

So, another week of freedom???

Archergirl

Well done but don't let your guard down, there will be tricky shenanigans from his end so don't be surprised, but you have done very well so far and are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel xx

last_mile

Yes a whole other week of freedom,
Apart from 5 texts messages, one to say we had a bill from council that we!!!8217;d missed payment on and when I told him I had paid it he got angry because !!!8220;we!!!8217;d discussed not paying it!!!8221;
One to let me know i had a parcel waiting at the post office and then one to let me know hed collected it for me
And one to ask for money because he!!!8217;s broke.

I have given short answers to all and not responded where it was urgent or where i didnt want to.

Archergirl

Good work......hope you didn't give him any money, why did he think he could ask you for some?

Smodlet

I think you are seeing his true colours now, last mile.

-taff

I broke up with an ex, he had turned into someone I had to look after rather than someone who was an adult [he'd always been like that to be fair but his mother took up most of that slack for a while so i didn't see it].
I felt awful about leaving him for a while. Then I thought, hang on a bloody minute, he's an an adult, he makes his own decisions, if he wants to behave like that, that's his choice and I am NOT responsible for him.


Felt much better after that thought actually sunk in and I stopped wanting to 'help' him.