20/20 Vision (repaying a debt to my home and myself)

doingitanyway

beanielou wrote: »

I wouldent be happy with somone shouting at me when I was paying them to do a job.
Has he a lot left to do?

Well done on getting a window quote.

Thanks Beanie I should have got the quote yonks ago, but done now:)

Builder still has today and tomorrow too.

He was just in my neighbours garage chatting. I never want to see him again after this job, but still smiling, being polite and offering cups of tea. It is killing me but needs must. I think the job is okay. I will look when he is gone.

Homegrown0

How frustrating! There's many different ways of tackling the situation if he wasn't happy with you keeping an eye on the job, mainly a gentle/ polite approach! Absolutely no need for shouting and making you feel uncomfortable in your own home. Glad the end is in sight.

mark55man

Feel your pain about tradesman in the house, a few thoughts

you are proving pretty good at organising and choosing people to sort out your various jobs. I think you need to rely on this so that you can trust them without having a look see every now and again. and 9 times in a day although its only once an hour does feel a little too much to me. if my manager came and ask me how I was doing every hour I would be in a differnt team before the week was out

he shouldn't have shouted - or even been so direct with you, but builders are not necessarily people persons and so may not have intended to be as brusque/shouty as you felt he was

now clearly you won't use him again and that is right, but for the next one you need to work out a way of being comfortable with the work thats going on yet not getting under foot (which is dreadul when its in your house, but just part of the pain of having workmen/guests/relatives in your space). maybe even say you are very interested in being more practical and would like to look at each stage :-) - ultimately though you are saying you dont trust them to do a job by looking over their shoulder and noone likes that

I am not trying to make this your fault, just giving a male pov and I'm not as alpha as most.

doingitanyway

Thank you posters for all for your support. It helps

It’s difficult to give the whole story in a brief posting. But the job involved burning the wood back to bare and when I went out the first time he was painting but I do not think he was burning back to the wood as I never saw that stage and it was all too quick. But you are right Mark88 I don’t think I do trust him and he probably knew that hence him shouting at me when I came out.

I do think the recent incident with the electrician left me bruised and even more lacking in trust.

I have lots more to do so I think I need to work on taking on people I trust and letting them get on but perhaps agreeing I would want to see the stages of the work and agreeing how that can be done that they are happy with. If they don’t agree they are probably not a good fit for me.

I ended up not going out at all and he is much happier, but I am not! I feel like I should be able to see the stages. I don’t think I went out 9 times as I was working from home. I took tea out 3 times and probably went out another twice. I don’t think that is excessive, but I did not think 9 times would have been a big deal so I did not query it.

Thanks for the male viewpoint, it is very useful and I take it on board.

Today is the last day. I have survived. Work has been done that appears good enough. I have made progress and that is the plan

Have a good weekend everyone

HairyHandofDartmoor

Even if you were driving him potty DIA you are still the customer and you deserve politeness. We're self employed and you would not believe what we've had to put up with from certain customers. DH has never shouted or got cross (to their face) but has always been polite but firm. Your builder doesn't understand how to behave to a customer, even if you did appear not to trust him. Shouting or being brusque is never appropriate as there are more grown up ways to deal with every situation.

RosaBernicia

I think agreeing in advance that you want to see and understand each stage of the work would be sensible - you can always tell them that you have had issues before with people not doing as they said they would, with no need to go into details. I find that understanding how and why a job is done the way it is helps me appreciate both the skill that goes into it and the ways to care appropriately for the work afterwards. If that's understood in advance then it shouldn't be an issue at all, and in fact he/she should be able to pop in and tell you that they've finished a stage and have a tea break and chat at the same time.



There's no need for rudeness, even if he did feel you were hovering (and I can see Mark88's point, I would be rather taken aback if a new manager checked on me every hour - however, it's a bit different when you're constantly selling your skills to new customers).





Rosa xx

doingitanyway

Thanks Hairyhand and Rosa

It's good to get different views. It is one of the things I value so highly about being part of this little community.
I've definitely learnt a lot from this experience

doingitanyway

The builder just left but will be back on Monday. I hoped I had seen the back of him. Not yet unfortunately, but we will get there. The work seems fine and the house front is much improved. Today I stayed inside completely just like yesterday unless he called me out. Today he was upset because I said the colour of the paint was fine. So you don’t like it then? And on and on. I said I am not having this conversation and came inside again. It is hard. It will soon be over.

Good news. My emergency fund is complete. I now have a £1,000 emergency fund, just like Dave Ramsey says I should.:j:j

Other good news? 2 NSDs in a row.:beer:

So I can keep my options open even more I am going to try and save for my whole year’s council tax next. So, if I do leave work and take a year out I will have no mortgage, debt or council tax to worry about. That should save me from appearing on TV because the bailiffs have come

So far I haven’t handed my notice in but if/when I do I want to be ready

Hope your weekend is going well for you all

HairyHandofDartmoor

What on earth is the matter with your builder? He seems a bit unreasonable.

Saving for a year's council tax would certainly give you peace of mind. Well done on the emergency fund.

doingitanyway

Wearing my thermals is making a huge difference. I am very pleased I have them. I got my energy bill and it is higher than I thought. I used the dehumidifier a lot. I think that is more of an energy sucker than I thought.

Application in for something that I will reveal if I get it and never mention again if I don’t.

Went to Ald1. I did a big shop today so have all I need apart from YS food and fresh fruits and veggies I should be able to get by spending very little. Interesting to note their compost bags are 50p cheaper than Lid1 and have 5 more in the packet.;)

The builder has gone. The work looks good but he charged me an additional £323.00 in total. He did work extra I just did not think it was that much extra. Anyway, I am just glad to see the back of him to be honest. There is another job that still needs doing on the outside of the house, quite a smallish job that will take a day at most. I have already texted a roofer I have used and feel relaxed with to see if he can come and quote for it and I have had a text to say he can. :T

I am just glad it is all over. The ‘house’ fund is very low and the windows await! :eek:

Squirrels are back and noisily scampering around over the last two nights. I acted straight away :T and the squirrel man has just left so at least action has been taken.

Today has been one of my most expensive days in a long time

I hope your day has been less expensive.