Prosperous soul in the making

MovingForwards

I ended up queue jumping due to the road layout from supermarket to the petrol station. Driving past an expensive garage yesterday there wasn't a queue. It seems the supermarkets are being targeted first.

Maybe teams for Monday is more logical, face to face meetings can't be avoided.

Are you able to jump to another supplier rather than wait to be transferred? 

Neverending will come to an end at some point. Take a deep breath, dive in and it will all be worth it.

Tahlullah.H

Congratulations with the National treasure Hunt!  I was successful on the first go - Asda.  Hopefully, like you it will keep me for 2 weeks before refill.  Strangely enough, they had Unleaded, but they hadn't let those queuing know that there was no problem with unleaded, just diesel.  Had they done that, the queues would have shortened.

Shame about the Energy supplier going under.  Currently, the country is stuck between a rock and a hard place where it comes to fuel.  Right now, the big six seem to be the safest bet.

Good to hear you are still enjoying the Zumba.  It sounds like fun.

I know what you mean by decorating materials.  I just sold a large tin of Dulux Gloss White on gumtree.  I already have half a tin, and I don't particularly like gloss, so it seemed sensible to get some money back on it.  No idea when it was bought, but taking up valuable space in the garage no more!!

savingholmes

Hi MF and Tahlullah
Glad you both got fuel. I have lots of paint that I could theoretically sell - but I think - I will use it up post divorce. I am planning to paint the hall white so I can do the ceilings and the walls all in one without worrying about the carpet - as I plan to replace that too. Then it will display my art work better.

I am enjoying Zumba - as it's a form of dancing. It may be obvious to others - but I used to go to things like that and be completely intimidated and give up early on as everyone else seemed to know what they are doing. Now I realise the people who do know what they are doing are the ones that go every week - as they keep the same tracks for 6-8 weeks and then gradually swap some out but always keep some old ones. If I had realised that a long time ago I might have stuck with it.

The same is true for the Body Balance class - the same type of moves repeat each week - again with some new ones thrown in every couple of months. So there's plenty of time to get better. My instructor is also really good at saying x pose took me 4 years to be able to do - this pose took me 6 months. She has also highlighted to me 1:1 that there are lots of people of my weight and size who can do the poses - so it takes practice rather than weight loss for me to succeed. I found that encouraging. 

I am trying to stick with doing exercise I enjoy for now. At some point I'd like to add swimming back in and perhaps use the gym but I am trying to pace myself. I also have lots of stored up DIY tasks I am trying to achieve while it is still light. I always think they are easier to do in summer. 

savingholmes

Today I have...

• Watched some utube.
• Journalled a lot (I pretty much write in it every day). Normally a journal would take me a couple of months to fill - right now it's a couple of weeks!!
• Took DD food shopping. She batch cooked pasta with bolognese sauce and is taking it to work. She left me a portion bless her.
• Touched up paint on the shed door. Cut up the stained glass film ready to apply - but it went dark before I could.
• Made a roast dinner for me and DD. Batch cooked some soup.
• Talked with DS about how to come to terms with past, present and future self and write your own story - he's been doing a course on it and wanted me to do it with him - but I explained I already do my own version of it and suggested simpler ways he could do his.
• Had coffee with a neighbour and arranged to see a friend for a meal later in the week. 
• Sorted some of my art supplies into a spare plastic three drawer unit rather than the giant box they were in. I have NO need to buy acrylic paint for a quite a while... Acrylic pouring medium and canvases maybe but not paint... 
• I was surprised and delighted by how much paint I had. The only colour I might be short on is white but I still have some... I have loads of black which is another good base colour... Hopefully this will help me not fall into the trap of keep buying. I am going to try and K0nd0 my art stuff over time and say - it all has to fit within a certain foot print rather than expand and multiply everywhere like it usually does!! I also need to shop from home more rather than assuming I need more when I'm out (this though applies to most stuff!!).
• I also ear marked some unused art stuff for DD to wrap for me at xmas - it was what I did with Ex anyway - so decided to carry it on. He used to pay her to wrap it - so this just cuts out the middleman!! (This is in addition to whatever she buys me - but just gives me more stuff to unwrap). 

I was really pleased with the soup I made. Potato peelings from the roasties. Carrots. Onion. Red Pepper, Tin of condensed cream of tomato soup. Mushy Peas. Home grown baby potatoes. Tin of tomatoes. Cajun spice. Nutmeg. Turmeric. Garlic puree. Tomato sauce. Worcester sauce. Lo salt. Chicken stock cubes. It was very tasty and I have loads. I find if I eat veg soup it really helps me lower my fat % even if I don't lose weight. 

Feel I had a productive weekend and spent time with the kids and others and got fitter. It all helps...

EssexHebridean

Not surprised you're working through journals so fast at the moment with everything you have going on to process! it's brilliant that it's so constructive for you though. It's just great to hear how positive you are at the moment too - just look at that last sentence above! 

Absolutely get your intimidation on group things like that too - I've been exactly the same in the past! 

Grogged

The soup sounds lovely.
Sounds like a very productive weekend, even it involved a lot of paint! 😁

jwil

You are sounding very positive at the moment, and achieving loads too.  It's very inspiring, and you are encouraging me to do more as well - thank you  

savingholmes

Thanks EH, Grogged and Jwil

EssexHebridean said:

Not surprised you're working through journals so fast at the moment with everything you have going on to process! it's brilliant that it's so constructive for you though. It's just great to hear how positive you are at the moment too - just look at that last sentence above! 

Absolutely get your intimidation on group things like that too - I've been exactly the same in the past! 

Thanks I did re-read the sentence. I am pleased that I am genuinely cheerful most of the time at the moment. Reassures me I am making the right decision for me.

Well I went in work late and stayed late so it balanced out. Had a nice chat with a few different people. Felt valued and affirmed which was nice. Took it extremely easy tonight - going to have an early night I think. Ate porridge, soup and the pasta bolognese today. All tasty.

Tomorrow I'm working from home. So at some point I want to clean the remaining 3 potting shed windows and apply the stained glass film while it is light. Maybe take puppy for a walk too. I'm awaiting feedback on a report tomorrow and then it's likely to be full on again for a few days. Final submission Thursday.Grogged said:

The soup sounds lovely.
Sounds like a very productive weekend, even it involved a lot of paint! 😁

I think you are just traumatised by your door painting experience. TBF I would be too

jwil said:

You are sounding very positive at the moment, and achieving loads too.  It's very inspiring, and you are encouraging me to do more as well - thank you  

Glad it's helping. I think the diary makes me more accountable for both time and money so it's all good. 

I am reading the @rtist's W@y at the moment. It encourages you to visualise alternative lives you could have lived... Today's choice would be stand up comic. A counsellor actually recommended it in the past. I think next year when thing's have settled down I'd like to do a 1-2 day course and see whether it leads anywhere. Either way I should have fun. Looks like it would cost £100-200 so not bad... I'm very into self-deprecating and dark humour in case you hadn't already gathered... 

MovingForwards

You've come a long way over the last few months. Reading your posts they have a feel of life is now heading in the right direction. There's a balance with DS and DD becoming independent, freeing up mental space and allowing focus on what you want to do with time and energy.

Obviously there's still a lot to sort out, but there's positivity and a strong woman showing in your writing. A sense of freedom and adventure with each passing day and update.

savingholmes

Thanks MF. I agree 

I have arranged to see family and stay overnight for free when I am in London. Booked a 4 day long weekend off work. Hope to go to an Art gallery and perhaps the V and A... Gives me something to look forward to.

Also potentially doing a virtual course 2 days of the following week.  Gets a re-qualification sorted.