My journey to a debt free life

Onebrokelady

Nicnak wrote: »

I think your dad's behaviour is very different too. You must be really concerned. Is there anything your mum can do to protect the money so that she is ok? I don't mean that this is her only focus, but so that he doesn't do something irrational with it and then she ends up not able to live etc.

Perhaps he has an infection or something? I know they can also make you very confused. It would make sense with the voice thing.

I hope tomorrow's shift goes well for you. x

Mum and Dad have the type of marriage where all finances are separate and not discussed,Mum has her own money from her company pension and he has his money that he has saved and from investments over the years,he has always been self employed and only stopped working about 5 years ago even though he was in his 80s,they both get state pension and own their house jointly
He only recently showed her his bank balance when she questioned how he was going to pay for the carpets, there isn't any way that she can control what happens to his money,if he chooses to give it all away then that is what he could do,she wouldn't be able to stop him and to be honest probably wouldn't even know until it was too late
Like I said to Cherry my sister has power of attorney for him for both health and finances but she is in the Midlands so quite a way away

He seems well in himself so I don't think there's anything physical going on,since he had a heart attack and then last year had flu and ended up in hospital he is quite good at going to the doctor if he thinks there is anything wrong,he seemed like his normal self yesterday and told me about losing his voice but he said he had a sore throat, he didn't tell me about the bits my mum told me about,she just thinks he is putting it on for attention so it's hard to find out what's going on to be honest

I will justhave to keep an eye out and see what happens

Work tomorrow should be a nice day as it's Christmas Eve ,we usually have a nice day so long as it's not crazily busy

Onebrokelady

Today has been busy, but I'm done now apart from taking the dog for her evening walk
The house has been cleaned and tidied to within an inch of its life,my bed had been stripped bedding washed dried and out back on, two loads of washing done dried and ironed ,I've been listening to Gold on the radio all day so lots of old hits and Christmas songs to keep me going
I'm now going to have my tea take the dog out then shower and sit down with a nice glass of something sparkly
The only negative thing that happened today was the cat was ill so DD had to take him to the emergency vets,we thought he has a blocked urethra but he only has cystitis thank god,still a bill of £94:eek: luckily he isn't mine so I don't have to pay it :j

foxgloves

Gosh you have been busy OBL. Worrying about your Dad & a difficult situation with tense family relationships. My only advice really, is what I tell myself, & that's "I will deal with this If & when it happens". You might be right about the early stages of dementia but it could also be moods changing with age, getting more cantankerous, etc. Worth keeping an eye on it but try not to worry until there's at least some concrete evidence. Difficult family dynamics when there is a family rift. We also have a family member with whom we have severed contact - long tedious story - & it does make certain interactions with other family members more difficult.
Hope cat soon on the mend. My old gtey tabby used to get shocking cystitis from bladder crystals - we were often at the vet for that.
F x

HairyHandofDartmoor

Excellent advice from Foxgloves re your dad. Don't worry until you know there's something worth worrying about.

It will be lovely to have a clean, tidy house ready for Christmas. I hope you have a good, Christmassy, non busy shift tomorrow .

Onebrokelady

foxgloves wrote: »

Gosh you have been busy OBL. Worrying about your Dad & a difficult situation with tense family relationships. My only advice really, is what I tell myself, & that's "I will deal with this If & when it happens". You might be right about the early stages of dementia but it could also be moods changing with age, getting more cantankerous, etc. Worth keeping an eye on it but try not to worry until there's at least some concrete evidence. Difficult family dynamics when there is a family rift. We also have a family member with whom we have severed contact - long tedious story - & it does make certain interactions with other family members more difficult.
Hope cat soon on the mend. My old gtey tabby used to get shocking cystitis from bladder crystals - we were often at the vet for that.
F x

Excellent advice as usual Foxgloves :beer:
It could of course just be him being more cantankerous than normal,it's hard to tell :rotfl:I am definitely going to deal with it if and when something happens,I've got used to my family dynamic being difficult and have spent many years wishing for a happy family set up but I've had to make my peace with the fact it's not going to happen now,it took me a long time and a lot of heartache to decide to remove myself from my sisters orbit but it was the right decision for me and I'm glad I did it now

The cat had some painkillers and has meds,he is looking a bit more comfortable now,the only problem is trying to get him to take tablets,I nearly lost an arm last time :rotfl:

Onebrokelady

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

Excellent advice from Foxgloves re your dad. Don't worry until you know there's something worth worrying about.

It will be lovely to have a clean, tidy house ready for Christmas. I hope you have a good, Christmassy, non busy shift tomorrow .

It's so true too,I'm going to stop thinking about it and enjoy my Christmas,I'm sitting here with a Martini and lemonade as a treat for sorting the house out
I'm quite looking forward to my shift tomorrow as it's usually a fun day,my best friend is working and I finish at 3.30......what's not to like :j

redofromstart

Nothing to add beyond sympathy. Dementia is just an awful condition.

And I am with you on cats and tablets. I have to plead guilty to paying extra for the injected antibiotics rather than trying to poke them in. My fluffy trousered friend has hamster cheeks, and can spit a tablet out twenty minutes later, after a three course meal.

Willowtree222

Merry Christmas. Here's to a debt busting 2019. x

Onebrokelady

redofromstart wrote: »

Nothing to add beyond sympathy. Dementia is just an awful condition.

And I am with you on cats and tablets. I have to plead guilty to paying extra for the injected antibiotics rather than trying to poke them in. My fluffy trousered friend has hamster cheeks, and can spit a tablet out twenty minutes later, after a three course meal.

We managed to get one down him just now and I still have all my fingers :j

Onebrokelady

Nicnak wrote: »

Merry Christmas. Here's to a debt busting 2019. x

Merry Christmas Nicnak.i hope you have a lovely time xx