My journey to a debt free life

Sun_Addict

Really pleased to hear the inhaler is working. Gosh what a story OBL. So sorry you had to sell your beloved horse and heartbreaking you lost a baby. You’ve come through it and getting yourself sorted out. The only way is up from now on xx

Onebrokelady

enthusiasticsaver said:

I have heard this so many times OBL for the reasons for getting into debt and you have done brilliantly to turn this around and now be in control of your finances. 

An unreliable partner, debt consolidation, the feeling of being fed up of not being able to buy what you want.  More of your debt problems seem to have been caused by your ex than something like unemployment, unstable work history etc which is incredibly sad but I am glad you remained strong, you kept your house and provided your daughters with a home in spite of your ex rather than along with him.  It is a cautionary tale to people to not fall into those traps but I am sure it has made you so much stronger to be dealing with it.  Regardless of how your ex impacted on your spending habits  you would not have your daughters without him but you do wonder how your life would have turned out if you had not met him at 18.  

I love the Christmas tree and decorations and glad that the inhaler is working.  Take it easy at work still though. 

I just regret not listening to the good advice I was given the first time I came to the site, it took me a long time to realise I had made a massive mistake. I don't regret being with my ex partner just because of the fact that I now have two beautiful daughters. I would really really love another horse though 🙀😀

Onebrokelady

Sun_Addict said:

Really pleased to hear the inhaler is working. Gosh what a story OBL. So sorry you had to sell your beloved horse and heartbreaking you lost a baby. You’ve come through it and getting yourself sorted out. The only way is up from now on xx

Thanks SA,losing my first daughter has had a profound effect on me and I don't think part of me has ever recovered ,I was only 19 and when I think of my own DDs at that age I do wonder how I survived, but I did and I although I've had some very low moments life is as good as it's ever been at the moment, I am actually content now,of course I dream of what ifs but I don't drive myself mad hankering after things I know are out of my reach, I used to drive myself nuts trying to figure out how to have everything but then I realised just how lucky I am compared to others, I have family a home food and heat and those are the important things 

Willowtree222

Thanks for sharing OBL. I see many similarities with me.
You're doing fab now though and it's amazing how much you've achieved x

Onebrokelady

I've done the window now 😊

foxgloves

That's an interesting story, OBL. I was so sorry to read that you had lost a child. You were very young when you married & started a family, but that wasn't unusual in our day - you & I being of a very similar vintage. Plenty of girls at my school left at 16, got jobs & were married in their late teens. You obviously started out as a saver but then your life took off in another direction. I also saved as a teenager. I loved buying things, of course, but I had a part time job from the age of 15 to when I left home to become a student at 18. I'd saved £1000 by putting away some of my wages each week & spending the rest & that was a lot of money back then (1982). I didn't have your rollercoaster of stuff to deal with or small children to feed, I just embraced life in a big city by becoming an irresponsible spendthrift.
It sounds like you have made peace with the past, which can only be a positive step. It's pretty clear that being financially stable is a big part of who you are. I bet there is no bag of fritterings you could come home with now that would make you feel even half as good as sorting your finances out. I used to think 'living within your means' even sounded dull, fogey-ish & tedious. It so isn't. It buys us a bit of security. There is much in this world that we are utterly  unable to control - our finances do not have to be one of them.
OBL, you're doing alright!
F x

Onebrokelady

foxgloves said:

That's an interesting story, OBL. I was so sorry to read that you had lost a child. You were very young when you married & started a family, but that wasn't unusual in our day - you & I being of a very similar vintage. Plenty of girls at my school left at 16, got jobs & were married in their late teens. You obviously started out as a saver but then your life took off in another direction. I also saved as a teenager. I loved buying things, of course, but I had a part time job from the age of 15 to when I left home to become a student at 18. I'd saved £1000 by putting away some of my wages each week & spending the rest & that was a lot of money back then (1982). I didn't have your rollercoaster of stuff to deal with or small children to feed, I just embraced life in a big city by becoming an irresponsible spendthrift.
It sounds like you have made peace with the past, which can only be a positive step. It's pretty clear that being financially stable is a big part of who you are. I bet there is no bag of fritterings you could come home with now that would make you feel even half as good as sorting your finances out. I used to think 'living within your means' even sounded dull, fogey-ish & tedious. It so isn't. It buys us a bit of security. There is much in this world that we are utterly  unable to control - our finances do not have to be one of them.
OBL, you're doing alright!
F x

Awwww thanks Foxgloves, you are right fripperies do not hold the same allure that they used to and I know I won't get myself into that mess again 😊

Onebrokelady

Nicnak said:

Thanks for sharing OBL. I see many similarities with me.
You're doing fab now though and it's amazing how much you've achieved x

Thanks Nicnak, I'm doing my best and that's all any of us can do 

Sun_Addict

Your window looks lovely. I’ve got some of those paper snowflakes.

Onebrokelady

Last day off today so I've been doing a few bits around the house as well as chilling out so I'm ok for work tomorrow, I'm on a long day but my new hours kick in so it's only one a week now with two 8 hour shifts on the other days 🎉🎉 I really hope these reduced hours work for me and that I can live on the money, I won't find out for a month though so will be being careful, I have also missed a lot of unsocial hours last month so this month will be basic wages only, they do cover my essentials and debt payments though so I should be fine,I've got my Christmas savings so don't need to worry about that and DD2s keep will have to be used if things go a bit pear shaped,tho would normally go into savings for the floors but I might not be able to put all of it away this month,I will just have to wait and see
The silver lining to not being able to go anywhere is that I won't be spending money on Christmas nights out,none of our Christmas parties are happening this year so no need to budget for that. The girls I work with have decided to do a secret Santa between our team because we aren't having a party, but I was looking at it as a chance to save some money so I haven't said I will join in, it's not just the money aspect it's also having an extra person to find a present for, I just don't have the energy for it at the moment, I just want to concentrate on my family get them sorted and relax, I've already decided Christmas is going to be low key this year, I don't feel right partying and spending loads of money when people have lost family members and others are out of work and on the breadline, I think a toned down celebration is the way to go for me 😊

In other news I have got to halfway up the front of the jumper I'm knitting so good progress there and DD has told me she wants to finish knitting the cat blanket so I don't need to do anymore of that now 🎉🎉🎉

Ive also got two loads of washing done today and sorted the 🐓🐓 I got very eggcited when I looked in the coop because there was an egg🎉🎉🎉🎉we haven't had any for weeks because poor Ginger was moulting but she has got all her lovely new feathers now so has started to lay again, I did tell her it was ok to retire like Babs has done but she's not ready yet. Before 2011 when I got my first hens I never would have believed I'd get so eggcited about one little egg but it never fails to make me happy, having a pet where you put food in one end for them to eat then food for you to eat comes out the other end is the best 😀😀