Working for family

Pollycat

pearl123 wrote: »

£10 per hour for someone who is skilled is a bargain.

I don't think anyone is saying that it isn't a bargain.

Loz01

Wow, I cant imagine offering to help someone in my family then sending them an invoice for £10 an hour. Yes you should pay for the materials he's bought but its bit of a cheek to charge you a tenner an hour and land you with a huge bill, esp when nothing was even discussed.

If you do pay, dont pay in cash. His tax affairs aren't up to you, you should pay it the proper way or they'll be no trace of it.

sheramber

Unless the work he didi was for your business you cannot pay it through the business.

Working on your domestic kitchen would not be a business expense.

Has your FIL done jobs for other family members , friends etc?

Did he charge them?

unholyangel

Personally, I'd have spoke to him about it as soon as he handed over the invoice with his time on it and asked what was up. I hate passive aggressive. If you have an issue with something someone has said/done, pull on your big girl pant and talk to them about it.

If you respond in passive aggressive manners (like the FIL did with his invoice), all it does is build confusion and resentment - its not going to solve whatever the problem is.

Even just a "Look, you never said when you offered to help us that you expected to be paid and if you had, we would have declined as we were doing it ourselves to save money. But given you've been working for over a year without ever mentioning that you expect to be paid, we can only assume the fact you're now asking for money is because we've done something to upset you. We would like to know what we have done so we can try and put it right because you & MIL mean a lot to us and we do greatly appreciate everything you've helped us to do. We thought we accurately expressed that with your extra special christmas present, meals out etc but clearly we were wrong so please can we sort this so it doesn't ruin the relationship between us".

bap98189

samtoby wrote: »

We have had this conversation so many times my patience was wearing thin. Its taken months for him to give us these receipts.

So that is not the case. I understand though.

I don't understand why you need receipts? Do you not trust him?

If one of my friends does something similar, I ask him how much the stuff was and give him the cash. I don't ask for receipts. In that situation if a mate asked me for receipts I think I would be a little offended.

svain

Loz01 wrote: »

Wow, I cant imagine offering to help someone in my family then sending them an invoice for £10 an hour. Yes you should pay for the materials he's bought but its bit of a cheek to charge you a tenner an hour and land you with a huge bill, esp when nothing was even discussed.

If you do pay, dont pay in cash. His tax affairs aren't up to you, you should pay it the proper way or they'll be no trace of it.

Cash is fine, so long as there is some kind of paperwork confirming receipt

Marvel1

pearl123 wrote: »

£10 per hour for someone who is skilled is a bargain.

Would you offer to help, mention no labour cost per hour but do it afterwards?

PrettyKittyKat

I find this bizarre.

Has your husband managed to speak with him yet? What did he say?

pinkshoes

Is the FIL in finacial need perhaps?

How did the talk go?

I would be fuming, particularly if you got him an expensive christmas gift and taken them out for meals as a thank you in return for the help.

If I were you OH, I would be going along the lines of asking if there was some sort of mistake, as at no point had any salary been mentioned, merely the cost of materials.

Either way, this isn't going to end without someone feeling bitter...

Robisere

My son, dd and 3 working grandchildren have all done work of various kinds for us and we have done the same for them. We have always given them something, never was there an invoice involved though, I find that completely abhorrent and totally against the context of a happy family.

At the moment, my dd is finishing the rebuild and extension of her 200 year old cottage, into a large 3 bed home. Throughout the rebuild/extension, she has been able to call on her brother, our ds, to help out at weekends. We have chipped in when we can, with whatever help we can. We do this as a family and we celebrate our complete faith and trust in each family member, by having regular, boisterous family "do's" at a local pub/restaurant.

That's family life as it should be. I would never want to be the kind of FIL you appear to have.