Money Moral Dilemma: Should I force my friend to replace my £700 camera lens?

Gresp

Are you still in touch with his brother and mum? Do they know the full story?

I understand your concern about possibly driving them away, and I can understand if you don't want to drag innocent people into it - but maybe it's worth having a conversation with them?

If they are good family friends (with any of your family members), they'll surely want a happy resolution too. They might know more about what happened to the lens, or be able to influence him to do the right thing.

Philjak13

What a liberty!! Your friend needs to understand that unfriending you on Facebook ( virtual reality) will not cover his debt to you.
I would write to him ( actual reality and keep a copy) reminding him of his responsibility.
The small claims court is easy to access as are the Sherrifs who enforce claims.

freddy27

You should certainly make all possible ways of his payment to replace your lens. He is prefaricating, and needs to be held to his responsibilites.::eek:

happyinflorida

Why have you left this 3 years????

It's far too late to do anything.

It doesn't say how your friend lost the lens but from the way this is written my bet is your friend has taken it and either sold it or is using it when they realised how much it was worth.

Never let anyone get their hands on anything worth a lot of money, I trust no one except immediate family and that's because I know I can trust them. I don't give trust, it's earnt.

You should have reported this to the insurance and made a claim immediately as your friend hasn't paid you back - which doesn't surprise me. I don't understand why you allowed them to say they'd pay you back and they wouldn't let you make a claim - that is very suspicious to me.

You've learnt an expensive lesson from this.

chrisdy34

Do you have any other means of contact to attempt to reclaim the money? What have you done about this in the 3 years since the incident?
I'm afraid you have left it too late to have any recourse other than Judge Rinder as someone suggested - but even that would
mean your 'friend' agreeing to appear.I think many of his cases, particularly those involving family members, are set up for good TV viewing! You could send an official looking letter to suggest 'further action' will be taken if a payment is not made, or try to agree on an acceptable settlement figure as he did admit responsibility for the loss. Do you owe him for anything that he may consider offsets the debt??

chrisdy34

Now I have read back on the full story I think Judge Rinder is the best bet. I don't know if they pay you for appearing but it could end up a 'win win' if they do and you may salvage your friendship yet!

parkrunner

In what way is this a moral dilemma?

juliamarsh

adibell wrote: »

I can;t see any messages that were also sent via facebook, as he doesn't appear to exist to me any more

Just to say that even if he has blocked you on facebook you should still be able to view any messages that have gone on between you in the past as long as you yourself have not deleted the conversation - have you checked?

Rex_Mundi

parkrunner wrote: »

In what way is this a moral dilemma?

Adibell emailed the site team asking for advice.

The team decided to post this to ask opinion from others.

The dilemma as I see it is, do you forget the debt and put it down to experience or chase it down now as the law allows?

Both options are valid, but what do you do?

It is morally right to pay your debts. Is it morally right to enforce a debt on someone if they refuse?

andygb

adibell wrote: »

This mate of his said that he could get the repair done by his work and he'd just bill it as one of his lenses. His friend seemed trustworthy,

Ah, the plot thickens.
That is fraud - a criminal act, and you have named the company who will have been defrauded.
Well done!
No sympathy from me whatsoever.
By the way, what sort of person who is willing to commit fraud can be called "trustworthy"?;)