Money Moral Dilemma: Should I force my friend to replace my £700 camera lens?

EachPenny

Between Jan/Feb 2015 (when he said he would pay you) and October 2016 there were no messages from him saying he still owed you the money? But you were in the same room as him and his brother at Christmas 2015?

So what's stopping him (backed up by his brother) claiming you agreed at the Christmas get together that your friendship was worth more than the money and to forget about it? Then naturally he gets annoyed when 10 months later you raise the subject again and insinuate his financial difficulties had something to do with the lens getting lost in his care. (And bear in mind you didn't go to collect it promptly - in your own words "I eventually went over to collect it")

Your repeated messages over a long period of time suggest that rather than wanting to resolve the problem (i.e. "if you can't find it by the end of the month I'll have to claim on my insurance") you've turned it into something bordering on a vendetta. Especially as you've now left it 14 (or15?) months with no contact before raising it again and threatening to take him to court.

You need to think how this could be viewed from the other side of the argument if you actually decided to take it to court.

October 2016 was really your last opportunity to go down the legal route with any significant chance you'd win.

Jackmydad

The only thing I'd add, which may not be seen as "useful" by the OP, but is true,. People who rip you off are not your friend.
Friends, real friends that is, just don't do that.
A real friend would have gone and got your lens for you, and made sure it was safe, or would have paid for any loss.
My grandfather was very fond of an old adage.
"Love many. Trust few. And always paddle your own canoe."
I trust very, very, few.

Rex_Mundi

Just a thought

Send a letter before action detailing your previous attempts to resolve this and the fact he previously said he would pay you back.

Tell him you are sad to take this course of action now but you feel you have no choice. Tell him this could leave him with a CCJ on his credit record affecting any credit applications he makes.

Tell him for the sake of your old friendship you are still willing to discuss a repayment plan and if he is interested he can contact you on facebook.

He might ignore this and you are no further along

Or

He might contact you denying any knowledge of the loss or him agreeing to repay you

Or

He might message you acknowledging the facts which would give you more evidence to use in court (take screenshots)

Or

There is a small chance he can repay you now (I wouldn't hold your breath on this one)

For the price of a letter. I think it would be worth a go

BarryBlue

REJP wrote: »

If you can prove he lost it and refused to claim on insurance, my suggestion would be to go to the Small Claims Court.
Can you prove he had insurance?
He has unfriended you so you are not going to lose a friend are you?
I have found in the past that the suggestion of going to the Small Claims Court suddenly results in “lost property” reappearing, or money being found to settle a debt before details are published in local papers.
Very sad to see the nasty posts saying the person asking for advice is being called stupid for not claiming on his or her own insurance, or the sarcastic response about unfriending. The insurance company would see this as a criminal case and want proof of theft, and a claim case number from the police as it would have had to be reported as theft at the time the so called friend “lost” the lens.
If this is a genuine request for advice and not a made up problem why can we not be helpful and not dismissive to the loser? Sarcasm helps nobody.

Some sensible advice there. I do agree that just the prospect of a Small Claims action may prompt some recompense. So a formal 'letter before action' is required to start that process.

On a point of order, don't take any notice of those who say it's too late to do anything. You have six years to take out an action. It may be your word against his, but a civil court will go on the balance of probability if you did get that far.

AnneMary

Three years ago? Time to move on.

peter_the_piper

Maybe of help to get note from the camera shop (if possible) just to prove it was with them, maybe even a signature??

trigger_fish

Judge Rinder fancies this one.

EachPenny

trigger_fish wrote: »

Judge Rinder fancies this one.

Too right. I can just see him saying "You can't sit on your bottom for 5 years 364 days and then suddenly decide you want to take legal action, why the delay?"

aardvaak

If you do he possible won't be a friend anymore

trigger_fish

crmism wrote: »

Ihis name comes up in conversation, you will be telling everyone the truth of the matter and warning them what a deceitful individual he is. Unless you do that, he'll never see sense or compensate you

I really wouldn't go down that route.

You'd come across as bitter and twisted up and he's not there to defend himself.

And some might think that actually you are the liar.