Mooloo’s Managing it in 2018

thorsoak

Please read through your early threads Mooloo ....if you bring her back to the area where you are, where you had so much trouble with the family from hell ....do you really want to allow DGD to be influenced by this family in the way that her mother and aunt have been? They will come back into twin 2's life if she comes back.

Also - think about DS - you have not offered to have him and his babies with you ....what do you think might be his reaction if he sees his sister getting the support that you did not give him? What would that do to your relationship with him?

As you say, let us hope that Cornwall will give them a good support worker who will support her and her partner (don't forget that the new baby is half of another family too).

I do understand just how torn you must be - I would be too in your circumstances. I'm just trying to be the little voice of reason and common sense sitting on your shoulder warning you off whilst normally I am cheering you on.

Savvy_sewing

DS did stay here for a short while before his baby was born. I paid the deposit for their first flat. I helped them keep the house when they were going to be evicted.
I paid for his driving lessons and car to allow him freedom of movement to get work.
Biggest helped him completely furnish his current flat.
No social services decided he couldn’t have his babies. I am sorry but I just know that NONE of my children would ever judge me for helping twin 2 this time, we all regretted that we didn’t win the argument against adoption for the boys.

I am looking at the worst case scenario as if I can face that then I can face anything.
If yein2 is here the family from hell will not bother her as we are in a town 12 miles away from them.
I do see your points and I do hope that I will not need to step in.
But I am well aware we don’t live in an ideal world and I cannot see my being able to help from such a distance.

*Robin*

Oh dear, Mooloo - (((hugs))) - please listen to Thorsoak, her words make perfect sense..

Re your Portuguese Dream; you don't have to own a property over there to run holiday sewing courses.. I could point you towards three people in Southern Spain who have already created beautiful centres where they offer their own specialist holidays, catering for up to a dozen visitors and their partners / families.
All are open to guest course leaders coming in and using their facilities when they don't have a course running themselves; effectively the guest leader rents the whole centre and organises their own activity. All three places have en-suite rooms and/or family cottages, a large activity hall, communal dining area, a swimming pool and beautiful grounds. Two of these three centres offer catering and cleaning services in the rental cost, and of course they already have information for visitors about other local attractions (at one place a couple of minibus excursions are included).
I also know of a woman in Portugal who had a similar set-up, but alas she was a victim of last summer's terrible fires so is currently trying to raise enough funding to rebuild.
..But these are just examples; am sure you could find a choice of similar centres available to rent in your favourite area in Portugal, and there must also be companies who rent or lease sewing machines.

Savvy_sewing

*Robin* wrote: »

Oh dear, Mooloo - (((hugs))) - please listen to Thorsoak, her words make perfect sense..

Re your Portuguese Dream; you don't have to own a property over there to run holiday sewing courses.. I could point you towards three people in Southern Spain who have already created beautiful centres where they offer their own specialist holidays, catering for up to a dozen visitors and their partners / families.
All are open to guest course leaders coming in and using their facilities when they don't have a course running themselves; effectively the guest leader rents the whole centre and organises their own activity. All three places have en-suite rooms and/or family cottages, a large activity hall, communal dining area, a swimming pool and beautiful grounds. Two of these three centres offer catering and cleaning services in the rental cost, and of course they already have information for visitors about other local attractions (at one place a couple of minibus excursions are included).
I also know of a woman in Portugal who had a similar set-up, but alas she was a victim of last summer's terrible fires so is currently trying to raise enough funding to rebuild.
..But these are just examples; am sure you could find a choice of similar centres available to rent in your favourite area in Portugal, and there must also be companies who rent or lease sewing machines.

That’s very interesting Robin. I will pm you for more details later. I am just going out to my Mum’s now.

Savvy_sewing

Please with my day. A mini blitz in the kitchen, a load of washing on, and the sitting room tidy and vacuumed before I went out at 10.30
Petrol purchased, drove to Mum, went to Aldi, just less than £18 for my Shop. On to Northampton to the Millshop. Both of us got some remnants. Mum paid for our haul, £22 between us.
Then a stop in a local village for lunch.
Then a drive back to drop Mum off and back home intime to put the shopping away before Dgd finished school. While Dgd played with her friends in the garden I ran up a pair of Tabtop curtains for the front room out of my pieces of fabric!
Really pleased.
My job this evening is name tags on a Customers childs school uniform as they are changing schools midterm.

Savvy_sewing

Wonder what today will bring?

thorsoak

Mooloo wrote: »

Wonder what today will bring?

Nothing negative, plenty of positives, Mooloo! :-)

Savvy_sewing

Plenty work in.
DS brought the new baby in to see us at the shop, so both biggest and I got a quick cuddle. DS is full of the cold or flu, he is literally dragging his self around.

I have been at work until 5.30. So good sign that I have work in to do.

Savvy_sewing

Interesting day yesterday. As you know I now work with my eldest daughter, and it has been great so far. Worrying about whether it would work etc, concerned that she was going to pack up, but we talked and she stayed. She is more like me than I ever knew, not in looks, or mannerisms but in the strive to improve, better life, help others, striving to reach goals, have dreams, and get frustrated when life gets in the way.
Yesterday she was definitely in one of those days where she wants to do so many things but doesn’t know how etc.
My suggestion was first to mind map.
A tool that I have learned from Matrix girl. That will help her to get what she wants down on paper, and from there she should be able to see what her next move is.
It reminds me that although I have been on my path for a while, I too am at that stage where I want more, different, and something that scratches that itch to do something different!!
We talked about my relationship with BF, and like you all she asked me if I was happy? Actually I am not sure that I am. I have wanted, strived to make the relationship work, why? Because I don’t want to be failing in relationships again! I try to make it work. But actually we all know that I am not getting what I want out of it. I don’t laugh much, I am set in a routine that is now making me feel trapped and chained into a routine that doesn’t allow me to be spontaneous or to actually have much spare time for all the things that I want to do.
We talked about family and suddenly DS turned up with the baby.
My family are important to me, yet I hardly ever spend Social time with my kids or grandchildren.
This year I am making changes, and I have a week in Kent with Biggest and her family in the area of Twin1, ready for gds5 Christening.
I want more time with my family, and the changes in the domestic arrangements in BFs has given me more alone time, more time available to see my children.
I am definitely going to be doing a mind map again, to re assess the situation I find myself in. Maybe the wanderlust is because I have always moved regularly until I came here, how I have never really made this my home for the long term. I just put up with it.
So I will be making time to see where a mind map will take me.
I know that I do want more time with members of my family.
I am starting by inviting DS and Biggest and their families next Sunday.

Artytarty

Well done Mooloo! It sounds like the fog of gloom and uncertainty is lifting.its very clear from your posts that family is your thing, I recognise that part of myself in you!
We tackle things differently, I’m not a dreamer, mapper or list making, I’m a make your mind up and then do it type, persistently chipping away until it happens, but whatever works for us eh?
A good place to start is with a clear out, clutter, emotional and physical baggage. Good luck on the next level of your journey Moo.