Wife taking surname

martinbuckley

Mojisola wrote: »

I think you must be being deliberately missing the point.

In the example above, John Smith and Anne Jones had a child who was given the surname of the mother.

They later married and both parents and the child kept their own surnames.

You seem to assume that every child gets given the father's surname and that the mother should change her name so that the family all have the same name.

In the case of the family above, the father would have to change his name for the whole 'team' to share a surname.

This isn't about John or Anne. Its about a bloke whose wife has chosen to have a different name to the rest of the family - in case you'd forgotten.

unholyangel

martinbuckley wrote: »

This isn't about John or Anne. Its about a bloke whose wife has chosen to have a different name to the rest of the family - in case you'd forgotten.

Its not like they went to Asda for matching names one weekend and she decided not to get one. Nor did she influence her parents decision in what to name her. So a bit unfair to say she's chosen to have a different name.

However the choice facing women is that we can either keep our name and potentially have a name different to our children or husbands. Or we can change our name and have a name different to our parents or siblings. Either way, we'll have a name that is different to the rest of our family.

miriamac

martinbuckley wrote: »

If she is happy being the odd one out in your family unit then so be it. My wife took my name before we wed because she didn't want to be the odd one out as our child had my surname from birth.

Let us call the mother of your child Ann Nuther.

You planted your seed in the lovely Ann before you had wedded her and she bore the fruit of your loins. Congratulations .

Let us imagine the lovely and unwed Ann registering the birth of baby Nuther, as she is well entitled to do. Imagine if she had another Nuther born of your loins, and yet another Nuther. All registered as Nuthers.

Finally you decide to wed the lovely Ann. Congratulations

You're the odd man out in terms of surname.

Congratulations on becoming a Nuther with the Nuther mother of your children

Mazel Tov!

moneyistooshorttomention

unholyangel wrote: »

Its not like they went to Asda for matching names one weekend and she decided not to get one. Nor did she influence her parents decision in what to name her. So a bit unfair to say she's chosen to have a different name.

However the choice facing women is that we can either keep our name and potentially have a name different to our children or husbands. Or we can change our name and have a name different to our parents or siblings. Either way, we'll have a name that is different to the rest of our family.

To me it's obvious that if the woman keeps her name, then the children would get her name and not the mans. The only other option being if the names got double-barrelled (which I wouldnt do myself - because of trying to work out who has "really" got a double-barrelled name and who has got this 'modern recently made-up version').

I just don't understand why children would be given the mans surname in these cases - she's the one that has given birth to them.

Zandoni

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

To me it's obvious that if the woman keeps her name, then the children would get her name and not the mans. The only other option being if the names got double-barrelled (which I wouldnt do myself - because of trying to work out who has "really" got a double-barrelled name and who has got this 'modern recently made-up version').

I just don't understand why children would be given the mans surname in these cases - she's the one that has given birth to them.

I'm sure you'd struggle to find a man that would marry you on those terms.

Zandoni

I don't personally know any woman who has married and kept her name apart from a few double barrels.

So if Miss Jones marries and doesn't take her husbands name what title does she use, Miss, Mrs or something else?

comeandgo

I have two female friends who have married (not each other) and kept their names. They are work colleagues and are still Miss but that is their choice. We all know they are married and it makes not the slightest difference to anything they do.

Robthemog

When I married for the first time I took my husband's surname and we had a son. Second time round I kept that surname - for my son's sake really as I didn't want a different surname from him (he was still at school then). My second husband and I have the same first name when abbreviated - so there would be two of us with one name if I took his! So I say keep whatever name you are happy with

spirit

I saw a woman plastic surgeon recently. She's known professionally as Miss A*****. She is married and mentioned her husband/wedding many times that I saw her after that.


It is because they keep the name they had when they qualified as a Dr.


Who knows whether outside of the consulting room she's known as Mrs X or not. Not that it matters.

Mojisola

Zandoni wrote: »

So if Miss Jones marries and doesn't take her husbands name what title does she use, Miss, Mrs or something else?

Miss, Mrs, Ms or Mx - whichever she prefers.