My boyfriends SOA - Help needed here

LouBlue

black-saturn wrote: »

I'll tell him this tonight but I doubt he will listen.

She was offered a saturday job in a bakery about a year ago but as soon as she saw the uniform she refused it.

Not only that, we gave her money to buy a bridesmaid dress for the wedding (more than I spent on my own wedding dress). She couldnt see anything she liked so decided to spend it all on jeans and t shirts instead. A week later she found something she liked but they didn't have it in her size (she's a size 0 :eek: ) so they had to order it in and it was £200 (more than I spent on my wedding dress). So he handed over yet another £200 to cover the cost of the dress.

Hey BS - hope everything is going well with the wedding plans.

My niece is 15 and has started to get expensive tastes...takes after her Aunty, :rolleyes: so mum told her she needed a Saturday job. She moaned for a bit but got a job at a Bakers, she now LOVES it there and her confidence has just grown! It is 8am-5pm, she obviously has school Mon-Fri as well. She now has extra money if she wants really expensive trainers or clothes and realises that she has to work for little extras that she wants and its not up to mum, who is now a single parent, to fork out. Your OH has to be unpopular for a while, but it will be in her best interests and yours.

Shineyhappy

arabiandesert wrote: »

how does a quid/month work for pets/laundry

Well perhaps he has a cheap pet? I have a hamster and I dont spend much more than a pound a month on him as a bag of dried food lasts for ages and bedding isnt that expensive. Although his cage is so big he needs quite a lot of it:o

earwig

hi bs what councill dose he come under my brother is renting a one bed cuboard in hackney and his rent is 78 per week so your oh dose well for a two bed but weather the rent 52 or 502 he should be entilled to hb and ct benfit on that wage me and my oh had to have hb this year and we was earning more than your oh and we got hb so he must be entillted to it

the question is dose he get hb and not tell you so he has some extra spends or has he just not applyed for it as he thinks he wouldnt get it anyway you know him better than me to answer the question as for his dd unless her name is on the tennancy she will not be allowed to stay on at the flat once your oh has moved in with you the councill will have to rehouse her proberly a bedsit or one bed flat so he can move in with you now and let the dd get rehoused espicaly if hb is going to pay the rent for her

black-saturn

He rents from Newham Borough Council.

His daughter is having her name put on the tenancy when she is 18.

black-saturn

Shineyhappy wrote: »

Well perhaps he has a cheap pet? I have a hamster and I dont spend much more than a pound a month on him as a bag of dried food lasts for ages and bedding isnt that expensive. Although his cage is so big he needs quite a lot of it:o

Yes he has 2 mice. They don't cost much.

He doesn't have a washing machine as his washer broke down and he can't afford another one. So he hand washes all the clothes and everything in Stardrops which anyone on the OS board will tell you is cheap.

black-saturn

Floss wrote: »

Does OH's daughter spend the EMA on herself? Or does she buy her lunches with it, bus fares, books, paper etc? If it is the latter then I would say it's being used fairly, given your OH's circs. If it is not, then I personally would suggest he stops the £10 and she learns to manage! And as for the lap-top - mayb she can use some of her bonus towards it, and repay half the cost out of her EMA?

She doesn't pay travel as students get free bus fayres in London. She doesn't eat lunch. She eats breakfast before she goes out and a pasta meal when she gets in (thats how she gets to a size 0 ). She bought a few books at the start of her A levels with her EMA but hasn't spent any of it since.

Floss

Maybe she could buy her own lap-top then? She will have over £400 by Christmas.....

black-saturn

He will be moving here in May/June but she won't be going to Uni until September/october. She won't come and live here for 4 or 5 months so the council advised thats how we should do it. When she goes to Uni he will have to give the flat up. I fully agree with what you say about a 2 bedroom council flat should be for a family.

astonsmummy

wok_boy wrote: »

Ahem, no judgements please

And who are you?

Jacks_xxx

:wave: Hiya Black-Saturn,

I'm not going to be much help with the SOA I'm afraid as I can't make head or tail of it either - but that happens to me quite a lot on here so I wouldn't read tooo much into that.

I just wanted to post and sympathise with you really.

I am slightly horrified that your step-daughter-to-be would spend her bridesmaid dress money away on jeans and T shirts when she must know that money is tight for all concerned - but then I know of a girl whose parents transferred cash for a terms rent into her account and she spent it on jeans and handbags instead so your step-daughter-to-be wouldn't be the first selfish teenager I've ever heard of.

I'm even more worried that she won't get a job hrself but she's asking for a top of the line laptop! Fair enough if she's putting her all into her studies and doesn't want work to detract from that - but what about a holiday job?

Nobody gets a completely free ride at Uni these days and they're only there 8 or 9 months of the year anyway. Who is she thinking is going to feed, house and clothe her for the next three or four years?
Big hugs honey I think you've got your hands full there. :eek:

Love Jacks xxx