Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

HairyHandofDartmoor

Thank you Lucky .

HairyHandofDartmoor

Today I felt upset again in the morning. Christmas has really disrupted my equilibrium . But luckily we had a busy day planned.

DH and I went to Mr T this morning as we'd run out of normal food, plus we needed dishwasher tabs, laundry powder etc. We spent £74. Then I spent another £8 on seven rolls of half price Christmas gift wrap and half price crackers for next Christmas. So a bit of a spendy day.

In the afternoon DH, DS1 and I met my three grown up nieces who are visiting locally, plus aunt and uncle, at a local NT place. The house had been decorated for Christmas. It was nice to see them all as I don't see my nieces very often and the weather was sunny. The only money we spent there was on a cup of tea.

Now we're just having a quiet evening. I feel sadder than usual at the moment, presumably because Christmas has stirred up all sorts of emotions.

I'm also dreading new year's eve because we always spent it with my mum and stepdad. We don't have anyone to spend it with this year. DS1 is spending the night at a friend's house, and DS2 and DS3 may not emerge from their rooms. So it could be just DH and me on our own with me feeling sad. Not a great prospect for either of us .

We decided to ask aunt and uncle if they'd like to come on new year's eve for a buffet tea, but they're not sure what their son or SIL is doing, so they're going to let us know if they can make it.

HairyHandofDartmoor

This morning we are going to be in all day working on my business. I hope that will enough of a distraction for me.

We have lots of party type food left over from Christmas, but we thought we'd save that for new year's eve. If aunt and uncle come we'll have enough, or if it's just four of us it will be more than enough food. I'm enjoying going back to my normal eating pattern.

I have two bottles of red wine and one bottle of mulled wine in the house. I bought two and stepdad gave me one. This was in case I wanted a drink over Christmas. I felt so upset that I didn't want to risk alcohol heightening my mood, so this has been my first tetotal Christmas since I was a child. I can't say that I've missed it at all, although normally I enjoy a drink.

I spent my Christmas money and vouchers on a pair of half price pajama trousers in the fatf@ce sale, as I only had one pair which made it hard to wash them. I also got some lovely socks in their sale for £2 a pair and I needed socks. Apart from that I bought two pairs of work trousers to wear for volunteering with my Christmas money, as my current ones are massively too big for me and practically falling down. I made sure they had some elastane in so they fit me better. I've gone down one and a half to two dress sizes since my mum died.

I hope everyone has a good day today .

[Deleted User]

Good luck with the work on your business. What a lovely DH to spend so much time helping you get things set up:beer:. Well done on your MSE bargain buys gifts from your vouchers and Christmas money.


I'm very concerned about your weight-loss. Not that you lost it in the first place which is perfectly normal in such traumatic circumstances but the fact that you haven't put any of it back on again if you are back to eating normally. If it's a concern to you please see your GP about it as it may be some underlying health issue. When my B12 deficiency started to show itself I lost over 2 stones and I'm only 5ft One and it really showed as I wasn't overweight to start with. It was other people telling me how worried they were at the change in my appearance that galvanised me into seeing a doctor. I was so tired that I was taking less exercise than usual and I still lost masses of weight just by lolling around:eek:. I'm starting to regain it slowly now :j:j(I don't think many women are so happy at putting weight on:rotfl:) but only at a rate of about a pound and a half a week and have regained just over half a stone now. A long way to go yet but I can eat for England so I expect things will be back to normal eventually. I can't afford to buy any new clothes and some of my usual ones look as if they're from Rent-a-tent.. Please take care of yourself xxx


I hope you manage to get out into the fresh air sometime today as that always seems to lift your spirits:j.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Thank you Carboot . I am eating normal food but still don't have much appetite and not having alcohol saves a lot of calories. I'm also more active than before as I can't relax at the moment without sad thoughts intruding. I'm not underweight as I'm only five feet four, so can't carry much weight anyway, so I'm not worried about it. I hope you had a good Christmas.

[Deleted User]

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

Thank you Carboot . I am eating normal food but still don't have much appetite and not having alcohol saves a lot of calories. I'm also more active than before as I can't relax at the moment without sad thoughts intruding. I'm not underweight as I'm only five feet four, so can't carry much weight anyway, so I'm not worried about it. I hope you had a good Christmas.

Thank you. You've set my mind at rest a bit. Take care though xx


Thanks for asking but Christmas is a non-event here although I always cook a nice dinner. I'm glad it's over to be honest so everything can get back to normal in the world. Just New Year to go and then a whole shiny new year to start on. I love that and actually starting a brand new diary (a real paper one not a digital one). I hope you'll begin to see 2019 as a turning point. You've come so far this year despite everything that life has thrown at you:A and have such a lot to look forward to with your course, business and the prospect of a job.


OH and I spent much of the main Christmas period going back and forwards to my friend's house as she is staying with her brother long term and has arranged to let her Godson and his wife live in her house until they can find one to buy. They were local but moved away for work and now he has a big work promotion starting in early January which is bringing them back to this area. They sold their own house faster than they expected (with no chain:j) and had to move out quickly so moved into a rented flat and put their furniture etc in storage. They have been to scout the local area here to find a house to buy but don't want to make a hasty purchase and so far haven't seen anything they like that they could afford. Prices here are higher than where they're leaving. They were going to rent for a few weeks to really get settled in and find somewhere they really like as it's such a big decision and financial commitment. When my friend heard what was happening she immediately offered them her house until they can find somewhere to buy. Seems like a good result all round. Means OH and I won't have to do our security patrols and gardening etc any more:j but I'll miss sitting in her warm lounge when it was my turn (nearly always) to check on things:(


She left in a hurry to go back with her brother all those weeks ago and just took the bare minimum with her but she asked us if we could gather up her personal stuff and get it to her somehow. She doesn't drive so taking everything back by train is a non-starter. She can't leave her brother to come herself anyway and certainly doesn't want to bring him with her on the train:eek:. She wants to give her Godson and wife the run of the whole house (they also have 2 young children) and wanted as much of her personal stuff out of the way. The 'tenants' are not bringing their own furniture at this stage so we're not moving furniture but all the other things she asked us to move amounts to a heck of a lot:eek:. We've been bringing it back here as we've gone along and will be driving up to deliver it to her on 2nd January. OH is hoping with some careful packing we'll get it all in the car with room for me too in the passenger seat but the way things are going so far it looks most unlikely. I think he'll need every inch of space. He may even have to hire a small van instead in which case I might be able to go too. On the other hand, although it would be lovely to see my friend again, I'd rather like a little time home alone (with the heating on;))


We've arranged to meet the Godson and family at the house tomorrow as we have the only set of keys and my friend is anxious that we explain the burglar alarm etc to them. I'm sure he's got the gumption to figure it out for himself but she wanted us to do it so we will. It's like the end of an era really, I doubt my friend will ever come back for good:(. She seems to have settled well in her brother's area and likes it there.

HairyHandofDartmoor

You've been having a busy time Carboot. It is a shame that your friend is moving away more permanently. Hopefully you'll be able to visit her.

jwil

Glad you made it through Christmas. The walk in the woods sounds lovely.

HairyHandofDartmoor

jwil wrote: »

Glad you made it through Christmas. The walk in the woods sounds lovely.

Thanks Jwil. It was lovely and I think I'd like to do it again next year. It made a peaceful start to the day.

HairyHandofDartmoor

My 50 pounds You Gov money has finally come :T. I claimed in on 28th November and it finally came today on the 28th December! I want to spend it on some new shoes to wear for volunteering.

I want 2019 to be the year I get a job, so apart from pajama trousers and socks which I desperately needed, my Christmas money and survey money is being spent on work clothes.