Desperate for a baby - but now things have changed

rachel6188

Hi Hun. I'm going to pm you xxx

triplecoffee

Ive not got all the way to the end yet so you may have covered this further along but being on the pill can make you lose your sex drive. if youre still not considering having sex for a while it may be worth coming off the pill (have some back up contraception available so youre not going down the unplanned pregnancy route) to see if this helps in terms of helping your MH as well as your desires for intimacy. I found one pill brand gave me terrible anxiety too . As your hormones stabilize you may find that this helps your view of sex.

EDIT: just seen someone else suggest the pill may not be helping so apologies for the duplicate post

pearl123

Plus if he really is not keen you could end up alone caring for the baby.

gingercordial

wad91 wrote: »

Thanks everyone.


I do want to feel better, but it really is hard sometimes and feel that it is not worth the bother. I do far more for other people than myself and it's hard to get out of the habit. I guess i almost use it as an excuse (oh i can't go out with friends because...)
I am really hope i do come out of the other side of this a better person, and feel that it will re-affirm our love for each other as he has stuck with me through all of this when he really didn't have to.

This is your depression talking, telling you you are not worth the time/money to get better and that your husband shouldn't have stuck with you.

This is exactly why it is worth spending the money on counselling and further treatment. If your husband had an injury and needed paid-for physio sessions to heal it I am sure you wouldn't think twice about whether he deserved the treatment. You are worth it too. The problem is it is "easy" to see that someone else is worthy of help. It's "easy" to see that someone with a physical condition needs treatment. It is much harder to see the need when it is a mental health issue and when it is yourself.

The initial 12 NHS sessions are to get you through the crisis. Now you've started the process you need to keep it going - otherwise as you've said, you've just uncovered the horrible stuff and haven't yet dealt with it. You can't just leave it and hope it goes away again.

Work on this and get yourself to a better place. Do this for you and your happiness and worth as a person. And it will naturally follow that this puts you into a better place to have a baby as well as showing your husband things will be OK.

Rosieandjim

wad91 wrote: »

Not make daily life 100x worse?

I am horrified that the counsellor has helped you open up 'Pandora's Box' and you have been left not knowing what to do with it. No wonder you feel 100 times worse. You should continue in a safe environment until you have resolved these issues.


Before any baby is brought into your world you should spend the money carrying on with the Counselling and seek help alongside this with sexual counselling.


Sorry to sound so blunt but putting a baby into this mix is a recipe for disaster. Get yourself well first