The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

monnagran

Lucky you. Im waiting for the first cactus to show itself and a camel to wander down the drive.

fuddle

What a day. Poor Lyn has been pacifying me all day. It's a big long story so I'll be brief.

What you don't know is Mr Pea Seedling is actually my next door neighbour. Yeah. He's the chap who clears the snow and piles it on my garden and tried to intimidate me into taking down my bird feeders in the yard.

I don't have a window cleaner and won't get up the ladders so for the upstairs windows I trickle diluted fairy liquid down via the top small window that opens. I then go down and wash it off with the hose. When this dries I then trickle dilute vinegar down. Works a trick.

Mr Pea Seedling called the police on the tenants who lived here before I did because they burned a chimnea in the yard and the smoke bothered him. The police did nothing but warned him for wasting police time. He got annoyed at that and went to his door at 2am with a baseball bat. I got this from PS when we were on speaking terms, thinking it's a funny story.

So I 'm spraying my windows and I hear an aggressive female voice MrsPS hiss' you wanna stop that water now, it's coming on my side' knowing that I really wasn't causing much bother at all I said 'I' m only cleaning my windows, and you can't control what happens in other people's yards. Upset I rang DH who was fishing. He said I was to stand my ground, I'd be finished in a minute, they know I'm doing it now so can close the door if they're concerned. I went back out picked up the hose when I heard that same hiss. Then I saw something at my wall, which is higher than 6foot'I looked, taking the hose with me getting MR PS in the face with the hose. I dropped it immediately, turning the tap off at the wall. I crossly said what are you doing there now look what I've done have you any idea how it feels to do that to a man in his 70's. Queue him doing his intimidation with words which had me standing my ground trying to get him to see that they do little things that irritate us and we're not antagonistic choosing to live and let live. I used a few examples one of them being how every Saturday his son blocks off the lane to wash and polish his car by hand taking a long time and doesn't offer to move when we need to get passed (he doesn't live here but he comes because our street isn't on water meters) and we have to turn around go round the block and reverse up the lane and that although it irritates us we keep the peace. Unbeknown to me his son and wife were there and began subjecting me to a tirade of of abuse the worst of it being 'you' re an idiot, you stupid bast Ed idiot you have lived here a year and my family have lived here 47 who are you to comment what we do. You wanna !!!! your t*at ting mouth your stupid little b*tch' the girls heard this from upstairs, and rang DH in tears. I didn't know thisat the time. His wife went on about my stupid seedlings and he should have let our rabbit die as well (he was supposed to be looking aft erthe rabbit as well but he did a poor job. We found it sitting in its own urine, no hay but I never brought that up in any of the greenhouse talk. The rabbit is my responsibility and I failed it by trusting someone who wasn't able to pop on like he wanted. I say wanted because Mil would come over for us but the last time she did she was accosted by him bearing his crossness as to why he couldn't be trusted to look after it, she rang us in tears while we were in Inveraray last year and I brought it up when we had that supposed heart to heart a few months back.

We went to a fro, me getting wound up because he just lies and manipulates. I tried to get him to answer why he felt it appropriate to tell me he closed the greenhouse door but leave enough room for a cat to get in but he talked really loudly over me at any mention of that so I'm wondering if he's even told his family the truth there.

A lot more was said, each issue twisted to the point I said "look I need to finish the windows, I'll be 30 seconds but I will warn you I will be putting dilute vinegar down when they dry.

DH has never spoken about the greenhouse situation but felt he couldn't let this go, got home, composed himself, got his words straight, and knocked at the front. DH hates confrontation and was quite nervy but he was holding his own in stern calm way. I herd PS saying I was lying and had to out there. I was cross, really cross and teetering on my Jeremy Kyle stage style because this man was calling me, the girls and even DH a liar. DH ushered me in telling PS not to interact with any of us from now on saying his behavior was appalling.

DH was cross with me for going out but when he was blatantly lying about me, twisting the story I had to contront those lies. What a mess over me cleaning my windows.

I've been upset since about 10.30 and now paying the price with a sore tummy and had nose bleed at teatime.

Why can't I just walk away? Why do I have to fight injustices? Why don't I ever learn that I never get a good outcome when I try to fight my corner.

I'm mortified and appalled I got him with the hose though. I said as much to him. It was never intentional I just got a fright seeing something peering over my wall. I know it doesn't paint me in a good light.it was a second if that and I imediately put it down and turned it off when I realised what hahapped saying to him I was mortified at what I had just done.

Edit:sorry, I wasn't brief was I?

Islandmaid

Oh Fuds - I wish I was near you - in the nicest way I am a complete bit*ch and would have a lovely, insulting, yet unprofanic word with Mr and Mrs PS x Utter c*ckwombles - some might say...

Floss

Fuddle oh hun, he is a prize pi!!ock, and I have to admit that if someone appeared above my 6'+ wall/fence when I had a hose in my hand, they would have got wet. Normal people don't do that, they have respect for others and are not bullies. I wish I could give you a big hug xx

[Deleted User]

You'll sort life out love, you always do and your nasty neighbour isn't worth the time to be upset about, certainly not to make you feel in the wrong. I know it isn't a crime to clean a window it's something everyone does and how they can try to make you out as being in the wrong is so way out it's ludicrous. New start tomorrow, from then on the nasties next door don't exist, live your own life and ignore their existence, don't interact, don't rise to any bait they may give, you're your own woman my girl and you will rise above it! and we'll be here to hold you up! xxx.

Nargleblast

Fuddle - pond life. Complete and utter pond life. You know when you hear language like that from someone of that age that they haven't got two brain cells to rub together. Doesn't matter if you accidentally caught him with the garden hose, his version of it will be that you deliberately turned it on him and that your DH went round there threatening him, you horrible, antisocial creatures, you!

If you work from the premise that you will always be in the wrong as far as he is concerned (and his village idiot of a wife) then you know not to waste your time explaining or arguing. Just have nothing to do with them. I suspect from the little bit you said that the P Seedling family were part of the reason the previous occupants of your house moved away.

Nargleblast

Incidentally, if your wall is over 6 feet high - either he is about 8 feet tall or he deliberately got something to stand on so he could peer over your wall. I think you have hit the jackpot - you are living next door to the neighbourhood Peeping Tom!

[Deleted User]

Little one, don't let this idiot take away your peace, don't let him spoil all you've built in YOUR home, you haven't moved into his space you've moved into YOUR space and he doesn't have the right to make you uncomfortable. You worked and planned for this little home, you've made it beautiful, you've sorted out problems with the youngest babbit's school and you've found your own level place in life and your neighbour isn't important enough to take that away from you. YOU are important enough to be able to live as you want in your own home. He is so very wrong and mustn't be allowed to make you feel as uncomfortable as I think you are. You are a human being with EQUAL rights my friend don't be afraid of him!

LaineyT

Ggrrr, am so angry on your behalf Fuddle, how dare he behave in such a foul mouthed way and try to intimidate you into behaving the way he wants, sounds like the whole family are the same given the sons behaviour with his car cleaning. Good for you for standing up to him, it’s probably not something he’s used to.

camelot1001

Oh fuddle lovey, what an awful experience. You will never win in their eyes but you are the better person.
Once you have calmed down concentrate on your lovely home and family and try to ignore them (difficult I know). Tomorrow Mr PS will still be an idiotic bully.