The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

fuddle

Aw Petula. There's teaching our kiddlers to be aware of strangers and then there's that. It wouldn't enter my head to use your scenario to teach and me being me would normally make a little nice, maybe funny, comment too.

I remember once when we had moved I said "morning" to a stranger and my youngest questioned my why I had spoken to a stranger. I had to think quickly as not to unravel the safety work I had done but to teach her manners. I said that it's ok for adults to be polite and smile as we walk past strangers and ok for little ones to do the same when with their grown up and left it at that.

I know if I walk past a man when I'm on my own I dunno whether to smile or not because I'm scared to give him the slightest bit 'come on'. I had it drilled into me never to talk to strangers that were men (why just men, some horrible women too) so clearly it's had some sort of negative effect.

[Deleted User]

Oh JULIETTET if you had seen just what WAS in that turn up you wouldn't want to be filling it up with blackberries! ewwwwww it was icky sticky squishy dark brown fine tilth MUDDDDDDD! ..... and lots of it too! xxx.

silvasava

How sad Petula - the media has a lot to answer for in making parents view every smile from a stranger as a potential threat to their child

Burtha - if your name is not on your house deeds you need to get a charge put on it IMMEDIATELY! Many years ago you could not own property under 21 and I was married at 19 - my ex also tried it on as at that time the married womans property act had not come into force. If I'd not acted I would have lost everything with 2 tots under 4!!

karcher

monnagran wrote: »

You say that it could be worse because no one has died.
Actually sweetie, the hardest thing in the world is mourning someone who is not dead.

Lots of arms are round you.

x

Oh Monna, I know that all to well and your comment made me cry.....:o

Even after 2 years and 4 weeks the grief remains (as does he somewhere?) along with all my unanswered questions: the main one being 'Why?'

Petula

FiL has "slid off" the bed *again* and OH has been down to get him back up as MiL simply cannot by herself. This happened twice and we bought him a bed grab, not a full rail, and installed it on his side of their bed. Apparently this has worked well in helping him to get up and steady himself before carrying on (dont honestly know as he doesnt say much). This time, for whatever reason, he was on the other side of the bed. I should say that he is not falling out of bed but says that he slid off whilst sitting on the edge.

I think things may be coming to a head, not sure what the outcome will be when they do.

I should also say:rotfl: that the apostrophe on my tablet keyboard has stopped working - I DO know where to put them :rotfl: I need a coffee or pehaps a caffeine IV!

lillibet_dripping

monnagran wrote: »

When it came to the contents he drew up 2 lists. His contained things like all the antiques and the new music centre, mine consisted of his cast off record player, the washing machine on its last legs and the vacuum cleaner.
You say that it could be worse because no one has died.
Actually sweetie, the hardest thing in the world is mourning someone who is not dead.

x

Ha! Mine didn't bother with lists - he broke in to the house one day (with some friends and a Luton van!) when he knew I was on the school run followed by a play date and emptied the house, leaving us with just our beds and an armchair!
...... and it's true - the hardest thing in the world is mourning someone who is not dead. Even after 15 years, it still hurts.

fuddle

I hope you don't mind but I have posted on the no 'T' thread. It's a thank you because my home, today, is complete. I wanted you to read it here because it's kittie's incarnation of these threads that have got me where I am today. It's thanks to all of you through all of these years that have helped me and I'd like to say thank you to you too.

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/72905503#Comment_72905503

Hard_Up_Hester

My ex tried exactly the same trick, he claimed there was £10,000 in the savings account and gave me £5,000 to leave.
There was £196,000 in savings, a house worth in excess of £600,000, a business with a £4 million turnover plus a pension pot that I didn't know about.
I used the £5000 to pay a solicitor but it didn't help much, he paid his solicitor £31,000.
The standing joke in the family is that we split everything 50/50.
He got the house, savings, pension and business, I got DS1, DD1, DD2, and DS2.
I got the best of the deal, but by god it's been a hard slog, seventeen tears ago and I've never regained financial security, but I am happy, skint but happy.

CRANKY40

Burtha you've had so much good advice that I feel the only thing left for me to say is that I'll hold him while you kick him. Don't think I'd be short of helpers either. Biggest hugs xxx

Hester I know a rude joke about your people like your ex....
Little Girl - mum what's a p...k?
Mum - It's a man's private parts
Little girl - so mum what's a (insert extremely rude word beginning with the third letter of the alphabet and not one that I usually use)
Mum - That's the rest of him

OK, so not all men are like that and the late MrCranky definitely wasn't, but my ex brother in law absolutely was and I've met a fair few like him. Thank goodness for the lovely people of all genders that I've met during my life that want to make the world good for everybody.

silvasava

I find it quite surprising how so many of us have been married to absolute ( insert appropriate word of your choice) and how so many of us have then managed to find good and decent partners - there is hope!