Open this if I am dead

Silvertabby

“ Get your own fire proof safe for your financial details - and make sure your husband knows how to access it. Then just leave your private letter in your parent's safe.
Originally posted by Silvertabby ”
Do you know how much a decent fire-proof safe costs??? Posted by onlyroz

We're only talking fire/water protection for important documents here, not a walk-in vault! We've had ours for a while now, but you'd probably be looking from about £200.

meer53

I think your OH should know about these things now. What if something happens to your parents before you ? He's going to have to know then anyway. Not wanting to know is a poor excuse really.

My ex was like that, like a sulky teenager who threw a strop when i asked him to take responsibility for anything, thats why he's an ex. Not saying you should get divorced of course, but he needs to understand these things will affect his life one day.

onlyroz

meer53 wrote: »

I think your OH should know about these things now. What if something happens to your parents before you ? He's going to have to know then anyway. Not wanting to know is a poor excuse really.

My ex was like that, like a sulky teenager who threw a strop when i asked him to take responsibility for anything, thats why he's an ex. Not saying you should get divorced of course, but he needs to understand these things will affect his life one day.

If my parents die first then I'll inherit their safe and hubby will have to learn the combination to open it. And how our household finances are currently managed is irrelevant - our arrangement suits us, and I never said anything about "sulky strops". I just want to make sure that there is a known central place that he can go to for information should the worst happen.

Tammykitty

Age concern have a free book - called lifebook - which has all places to put all "essential" information in it


List of banks where you have accounts, life insurance, funeral wishes,utility providers etc


http://www.ageuk.org.uk/home-and-care/home-safety-and-security/lifebook/


Provides and easy format to do what you want and may remind you to include stuff you are currently forgetting

onlyroz

The Lifebook sounds like a great idea.

Marvel1

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

Well sorry, but it's not especially practical, it would be far more practical for you to talk about this stuff now!

I'm sure we'd all love somebody else to take all responsibility for household admin, but as adults we don't have that choice, sadly.

This, he does not even want to know the supplier for the gas and electric! May sound awful, but how the hell he is going to cope living on his own?

jackieblack

Make sure you remember to retrieve your letter from your parents safe and update it every time you change a password, open/close an account, change supplier, etc etc

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Practically, emotional stuff will be an issue. Put a letter in for him, and each of your kids that says everything you think they know already about how you feel about them, how proud you are, etc, etc - if you don't tell them regularly, they'll need to know, and if you do, it'll the last time you can.

Other than that, if you make the best spag bog, curry or suchlike, put handwritten recipes in there - it might be the quick addition of a pinch or splash of x from the cupboard that makes it yours, and that sort of stuff is important. They won't remember it. In the same way, include your favourite perfume/scent, and anything else that would help the kids feel like you're there.


On totally practical terms, he'll likely need your full name, date of birth, place of birth, National Insurance Number, NHS number and the security questions you've set up for forgetting passwords - mother's maiden name, first school, first pet, etc. And driving licence, passport number, date of marriage and district in which it was registered.

Oh, and a family tree of medical conditions, as if your kids become unwell at any point, they'll need to give a family history - otherwise they could get an incorrect diagnosis/no diagnosis. Include thing like hypermobility, 'funny turns', precisely what type of cancers, back pain due to... wonky hips or spines, ages of diagnosis, miscarriages, everything.

ERICS_MUM

Well I think it's a good idea. I live alone so I consider it vital.

I have something similar in one of those plastic folders with 24 clear pockets inside. I update it with my insurance details, utility providers, list of direct debits, accounts, credit cards, Amazon and EBay accounts. Contact numbers for pension providers, photocopies of passport and driving licence. Items of value (a few bits of jewellery and a couple of antiques).

The file lives in the safe and my brother and sister both know where the safe is, the lock combination and where the 'emergency' key is kept.

lika_86

onlyroz wrote: »

If my parents die first then I'll inherit their safe and hubby will have to learn the combination to open it. And how our household finances are currently managed is irrelevant - our arrangement suits us, and I never said anything about "sulky strops". I just want to make sure that there is a known central place that he can go to for information should the worst happen.

Shouldn't he know the combination now?


What happens if you're out for the day with your parents and you all get hit by a lorry on the motorway and die? I'm not saying it will happen but presumably then all their important information and yours will be inaccessible.