When things hit rock bottom the only answer is to fight the way back up...

Hiddenidenity

It's definitely more worrying than things to do.

I must admit I can't switch off usually until I have everything done and the cleaning etc, but its all done. I am worried about a few things though.

EssexHebridean

Ok, try this. Get your self comfy on the sofa or wherever you feel most at ease. Close your eyes and actually focus on emptying your mind - I find for me that if I'm particularly stressed I have to start the process by literally envisaging the word "nothing" - if other thoughts start to intrude just "re-set" by pushing them away and refocusing on that "nothing" thought again. Don't worry about doing it for a particular amount of time either - even if you can just keep it up for a few seconds to start with, you'll gradually find that you get better at it.

The other thing you can try is just grabbing a book and settling down to read - you may well drop off naturally. If you've got a TV or anything visual playing turn that off too - if you find silence too oppressive then try something like Classic FM in the background. if you're concerned about waking up in time to do anything you have to do then set an alarm as that removes one area of stress that might be getting in the way.

Cherryfudge's thing about doing sudoku or similar is a good one - I've used that to help me deal with anxiety before and it can work well. Possibly if you're trying to get your brain to switch off though doing anything on screen is not such a good idea so maybe see if you can find something hard-copy to print off?

MeandO

Hope you manage to get some sleep Hidden, as others have said, sleep deprivation makes everything seem so much worse.
Hugs
x

Cherryfudge

{{Hugs}}

Have you tried writing them down? Sometimes it helps to put things into words, and for the small things that are only on your mind in case you forget them, writing down saves brain space. Bigger things, put into words, are at least quantified: no longer monsters with fuzzy edges.

I did see an article saying 80% of what we worry about doesn't come true. Of course that doesn't cancel out the other 20% but it makes it a lot smaller. Also if you have it written down you can make notes of what you are doing to deal with it, or simply write or draw your emotions on there too.

Of course we are here for you if and when you want to write here, but for private things, perhaps make yourself a pretend post and write some of your (very sensible and encouraging!) answers that I've seen you write elsewhere. Talk to yourself as you'd talk to one of us if we had the situations you face. Also look at how far you've come! You are strong and very capable, don't underestimate yourself. You have faced so much and come through stronger. eventually you will get to that light at the end of the tunnel. You won't be the same 'you' as when you started. You will have learnt and got stronger one little increment at a time. (Journeys aren't one enormous step, they are lots of little steps which you take one at a time and before you know it, you are finding a way through).

Cherryfudge

EssexHebridean wrote: »

Ok, try this.

Some really good ideas there EH

UncannyScot

Cherryfudge wrote: »

{{Hugs}}

Have you tried writing them down? Sometimes it helps to put things into words, and for the small things that are only on your mind in case you forget them, writing down saves brain space. Bigger things, put into words, are at least quantified: no longer monsters with fuzzy edges.

I did see an article saying 80% of what we worry about doesn't come true. Of course that doesn't cancel out the other 20% but it makes it a lot smaller. Also if you have it written down you can make notes of what you are doing to deal with it, or simply write or draw your emotions on there too.

Of course we are here for you if and when you want to write here, but for private things, perhaps make yourself a pretend post and write some of your (very sensible and encouraging!) answers that I've seen you write elsewhere. Talk to yourself as you'd talk to one of us if we had the situations you face. Also look at how far you've come! You are strong and very capable, don't underestimate yourself. You have faced so much and come through stronger. eventually you will get to that light at the end of the tunnel. You won't be the same 'you' as when you started. You will have learnt and got stronger one little increment at a time. (Journeys aren't one enormous step, they are lots of little steps which you take one at a time and before you know it, you are finding a way through).

Excellent words and advice from both EH and Cherryfudge there
:T:T
:A

Hiddenidenity

I will try thank you.

After all anything is worth trying and its a much better idea than mine.

I am so tempted to take a huge step backwards just to 'get rid' of the worries short term but I know long term it won't help Probably makes no sense but it does to me. I just have to remind myself that it won't help long term and that's what matters because right now it seems so easy to just 'fix it' the way I always have.

Cherryfudge

Give it a try. It's hard when you've had an 'escape route' in the past, not to go back to it, but it could just be a loop that takes you back to where you are now. If you want things to change you have to do something differently, which is never the easy option because the brain seem to default to what we've done before.

If you don't sleep now, you will eventually... maybe as EH says, just do something to distract you and lounge around for an hour or so. At least your body will be rested. For me the other option would be to go out of doors but I know that's not your thing and you would end up sweeping leaves.

ETA: maybe do just that - sweep leaves! A change of scene sometimes helps. x

EssexHebridean

I'm inclined to agree that some fresh air might help - and of course it will also get you out of the house for a while too which is probably a good thing bearing in mind what you've said about tending to slip back towards agoraphobic tendancies. In part that one is about understanding that you will never be "cured" of it I think, but learning to spot the signs of the problem getting bigger again and learning strategies to deal with it.

In terms of taking a step backwards to deal with things short term, you know ultimately it will just leave you having to deal with all the same issues but further down the line. It's sort of like debt consolidation, isn't it - you need to tackle the root cause of the worries rather than just looking for a short term fix. You'll get there.

Hiddenidenity

I know, stepping back seems so easy but the grass is never greener

I think it wouldn't be the best for any of us even if it would mean short term 'happiness' Need to move on I guess