Teacher broke schools child safeguarding rules - WWYD?

jackyann

That is ridiculous. A sensible parent will not let their child know they were anxious in this type of situation, so they don't grow up'scared of their own shadow'. But they will take sensible precautions.

60 years ago, as a young child, on 2 occasions I 'made friends' with men who were on their own.My mother watched from a distance. One was a lovely man who taught me useful things and who I remember fondly. Looking back, I think I brought joy into his life when he needed it, and that was a positive experience for me. The other was dodgy (I realise in retrospect) and once he saw I was a child with an adult looking out for them, he took himself off. I didn't grow up scared and distrustful, I grew up as sensible as my mum.

Spendless

cjdavies wrote: »

You should make more of an effort to be on time next time!

Is there a car on the market that develops wings and flies in the event of a hold-up?

tom9980

Mojisola wrote: »

I would get your friend to take a deep breath and stop worrying about 'what might have beens'.

I would definitely talk privately to the teacher and say that, if she was delayed again, she would prefer that the school's rules were followed and that the child should be taken to the office but not make any great fuss about this incident.

Had the teacher actually left the school? For her to be off site within 15 minutes of the children leaving class would be unusual in most schools. If the teacher had left but the classroom assistant was still on site, it seems strange that she wasn't asked to look after the child.

Your friend might not have known the other parent but the teacher surely did. He could be someone who volunteers at school or is a governor or has a job like a police officer and would be judged competent to escort a child to the office.

The last paragraph is exactly the situation at my wife's school the dad is the husband of a teacher and works in the child protection part of the police. In short don't go in guns blazing without more information.

The tactful way to deal with this is a private conversation thanking the teacher for not dropping her in the brown stuff.

"Thanks for not dropping me in it on Tuesday Miss xyz I am a bit confused why Mr parent was watching over her though but you know him better than me so thanks"

Everyone makes mistakes so if she was in the wrong that should be a gentle reminder but for all we know she may have had a good reason or better understanding of the situation than us random strangers on the internet.

Marvel1

Spendless wrote: »

Is there a car on the market that develops wings and flies in the event of a hold-up?

Didn't stop any other parents.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

fabforty wrote: »

I will start by saying that I am posting this on behalf of a friend (honestly). I was asked for advice and I'm genuinely not sure which way to go. My friends' youngest child is currently in reception (she is nearly 5). The school is very strict about parents being late for collection - if the parent has not arrived 10 minutes after finishing time (which is basically by the time all of the children have left the classroom), the teacher has to take the child to the school office. Attempts are made to contact the parents, depending on how late or how often this happens, parents receive a warning from the school, followed by possibility of Social Services or even police involvement (in extreme cases). On Thursday my friend was late collecting her daughter. It's the first time that it has happened - she was stuck in traffic. Once she realised that she was probably going to be late, she called the school to let them know but couldn't get through. School finished at 3.15pm and she arrived at 3.30pm - ready and willing to receive her dressing down from the school. As she pulled up she met her daughter's teaching assistant who told her that her daughter was still in the classroom (and hadn't been taken to the school office yet). She went to the classroom, expecting to find her daughter and her daughter's teacher but instead found the daughter with another child from her class and his father. The teacher had apparently already left. The boy had lost something and they were searching the room for it. The teacher had left her daughter with him, said that her mother (my friend) was probably on her way but if she didn't arrive by the time they finished searching, could he walk her over to the office! My friend was pretty angry to say the least.
My friend spoke to the teacher this morning (having calmed down considerably) to find out first hand, what had happened and the teacher explained that she didn't want to get my friend into trouble unnecessarily (she is never late etc), and therefore bent the rules. My friend is uneasy - nothing happened to her daughter and it was her own fault that she was late, but on the other hand she doesn't know this parent. Although he said he would take her daughter to the office, what if he hadn't? My first thought was that she should report what happened to the school, but the teacher will no doubt be in serious trouble if she does and she doesn't want that to happen. But, IMHO it was such a stupid thing to do.
WWYD?

I'd feel sorry for the teacher, as she was probably desperate for a wee and had no choice but to dash off across the site to the staff loos, having already spoken to the TA and the other parent to ensure that the child was not left alone or harassed mum got the 'you did not collect your child' lecture unnecessarily.

But then again, I ended up with somebody else's kid for three hours after school once because Mum decided to take herself off to the pub without her phone, assuming that the teacher would leave her own toddler abandoned at the childminder's to look after her at the end of an afterschool club where the office staff had already left, as they didn't want social services called on a doctor's wife who, as far as they knew, just wasn't answering her phone, so might have got stuck in traffic. I guess a parent from the same class living round the corner was thought to be safer than the teacher taking the kid 15 miles home with her for the evening.

LKRDN_Morgan

Woah paranoid much?

She was in a classroom with her classmate and his dad. She wasn't left in the local Wetherspoons on a Friday night.

Would your friend have reacted the same way if it was a mum in there? Because of course it's only men children need protecting from......

God help her when she gets invited to her first sleep over. I'll assume no dads/brothers will be allowed under the sane roof

Pop_Up_Pirate

We don't know the circumstances and just have hearsay to go on.

But the child is in reception, so hasn't been at school for long and already your friend is being irresponsible at home time?
Think she needs to work on her own responsibilities and forget about others who might 'seem' to mess up.

trailingspouse

Taking an hour to drive what is normally a 10 minute journey is irresponsible?? I hope you guys are never late for anything due to circumstances beyond your control. Ever.

When my son was in Reception (long ago, before mobile phones), I worked mornings - I left work at 1pm, and would be home by 2pm, giving me time for a sit down and a nice cup of tea before school pick up at 3.15. One particular day there had been a nasty smash (A1) - you know it's not going to be good when there's a TV crew already there and the vet (!) is escorted through the traffic under blues and twos. My nice comfortable 60 minute journey took 2 1/2 hours, and I rocked up at school at 3.30 to find my son and his teacher discussing how he could go home and be Mrs Teacher's little boy for a while and how many fish fingers he would like for his tea!

Being occasionally late for school pick up is fine. It happens. It's life Jim - but not at cjdavies knows it, apparently. Would love to know how s/he knows no other parents were affected??

Kynthia

Some people here are really judgemental and unrealistic people. No matter how careful you are there are occassional unusual circumstances that hold you up greatly. If someone is 15 minutes late once out of hundreds of times it clearly isn't because they aren't taking care.

Just because other children had been collected from that class doesn't mean others in other classes hadn't been affected or that one or two parents from that class didn't have a nearby relative they could call to attend. Or that the initial hold up was somewhere out of town where other parents were unlikely to be.

Marvel1

trailingspouse wrote: »

Being occasionally late for school pick up is fine. It happens. It's life Jim - but not at cjdavies knows it, apparently. Would love to know how s/he knows no other parents were affected??

Based on the OP.

fabforty wrote: »

School finished at 3.15pm and she arrived at 3.30pm - her daughter was still in the classroom with another child from her class and his father.