Potential dispute over car not mentioned in father's will

BobRoberts

This is a ridiculous situation brought about by my irrational narcissistic mother.

She has always been difficult, but has gotten worse since my father died.

She does not drive, but is fairly active for her age, and lives about 5 miles from a little town. There is a bus on her doorstep, and she has friends who can give her lifts.

My father, before he died, said I could have his car. I only passed my test last February and did not have a car when he died in in July last year, and I took the car after a visit in August. (I live in England, she lives in Scotland).

My mother bizarrely has it in her head that friends will be more likely to give her lifts if she owned a car, rather than in their own car. Even now she still goes on about this, usually in an aggressive shouty way. She has talked about how sometimes it is inconvenient for them to give her a lift, but is incapable of saying when it would be inconvenient to give her a lift in their car, but somehow would be convenient to give her a lift in their car.

Not to mention the expense - she would have to pay for the tax, insurance and upkeep of the car. Or, if she is worried about people using petrol, just give them some money or a thank you gift once in a while.

In every practical sense, it makes no sense for an 80 yr old woman who does not drive to own a car, just for the reasons she gives.

So I am wondering where I might stand legally - the car is now in my name, and I am paying the tax, insurance etc. But in her mind I have "robbed her of everything". And I guess, I am a little wary that legally, if not practically, that may have merit. If the car wasn't specified to go to someone else, it would reasonably be included in the "everything" part of the estate that would be left to her.

Any advice or comment would be very welcome.

Thank you.

Sea_Shell

As I understand it, the "log book" is not proof of ownership. You'd need something in writing by way of a receipt.

Assuming you don't have a receipt, and the car wasn't specified in the will as a gift to you, then I think it would pass to the named beneficiary.

I don't think a verbal agreement that you'd get the car would hold water, legally.

I may be wrong, i'm no expert, but I've learned recently that these things are pretty black & white!

moneyistooshorttomention

If your father didnt specifically name you as the recipient of the car in his Will - then it belongs to your mother. It is the norm for someone to leave all their possessions to their spouse - and to have to specifically state otherwise about any they intend to leave to anyone else.

I suggest you offer her a fair price for it.

NB; It doesnt matter as to the exact reason why she wants to keep it - it's her possession. So if she just wants to keep it sitting there on the drive and polish it up every Sunday - then that's her choice. It doesnt matter if she is narcissistic and it may be a term that you are just applying because it's currently fashionable to call anyone that one disagrees with by that term (rather than because it's actually true).

BobRoberts

That's what my concern is.

It really is a ridiculous situation, because the idea of her owning the car really is completely ludicrous and impractical, and so my naive hope would be that common sense can sometimes trump the letter of the law.

She lives in a remote part of Scotland, near the sea. I can virtually guarantee the car would just sit there, and hardly ever be used. She would have to pay the tax, insurance, petrol etc. I had to get the break pads replaced for nearly £300 because they'd rusted up so badly between March and August. All, apparently, just because she believes that people would prefer to give her lifts in that car, rather than their own. (Also, its an automatic, and a lot of people don't like automatics.)

I could just drive it back for her, but I would resent her mean spiritness so much that it likely would be the straw that breaks the camels back, and potentially have the consequence of us at a minimum changing our telephone number.

This really isn't just one thing - its been just one ludicrous thing after another for years that myself and my wife have had to put up with. it got so bad when my Dad was ill that I had to resort to recording our telephone conversations. When he was ill she managed to offend / insult virtually every medical professional involved, and the social care worked assigned to my Dad said that in 30 years of social care work he had never encountered anyone like here. I know this is only my side here - but trust me - she's something else.

Money_maker

There may be an issue with insurance as she would be unable to insure it to drive it as she has no driving licence. Her friends would be unable to drive it too as the car needs to be insured elsewhere in order for their insurance to cover for when they drive it as 3rd party cover. This may need checking.

Yorkshireman99

The only thing to do is return the car to her and tell the DVLA she is now the keeper. That way she has no legal redress and is then responsible for taxing and insuring it. She will find out the folly of her ways but you will be in the clear as far as the law is concerned.

Silvertabby

Have you told her how much it would cost her just to keep the car just so other people can drive her about in it?

If not, make a list (remember that you would cancel the road tax and insurance once you had handed the car over):

Insurance = £
Road tax= £
MOT = £ (and date due)
Tank of petrol = £

And that's without costing in new tyres, repairs, etc.

BobRoberts

Thanks - I had wondered about the insurance options if you don't actually drive.

And yes, I have tried telling her about the cost implications. Unfortunately I don't think she quite grasps that. Her reply was just that she would pay for it all. I think she probably just about could, but might start to get a bit tight.

Without going too far off topic, she has also ranted about getting into some sheltered accommodation in the town we live in. Seemingly oblivious to the fact that it would cost, at the very least for somewhere half decent, hundreds of pounds a week.

Usually when I try to explain things to her, and it doesn't suit what she wants, she just argues to the effect of "You would say that because you don't want me'. It has been difficult and strained since forever. She is very hard work.

Mojisola

BobRoberts wrote: »

My father, before he died, said I could have his car.

he died in in July last year, and I took the car after a visit in August.

So I am wondering where I might stand legally - the car is now in my name, and I am paying the tax, insurance etc. But in her mind I have "robbed her of everything". And I guess, I am a little wary that legally, if not practically, that may have merit. If the car wasn't specified to go to someone else, it would reasonably be included in the "everything" part of the estate that would be left to her.

If your father gave you the car before he died, then it couldn't be given to anyone in his will.

Just because you didn't take it away from his house until after his death doesn't change that fact that it had been yours since he gave it to you.

On the other hand, if you want to pacify your mother, give it back to her and let her deal with the expense of having a car while not being able to use it.

moneyistooshorttomention

At a very pragmatic level - how much is the car worth?

worried_jim

Yorkshireman99 wrote: »

The only thing to do is return the car to her and tell the DVLA she is now the keeper. That way she has no legal redress and is then responsible for taxing and insuring it. She will find out the folly of her ways but you will be in the clear as far as the law is concerned.

This. Just give it back and have an easy life, it's not worth the hassle.