Money Moral Dilemma: Should I 'reclaim' my car expenses?

Former_MSE_Nick

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

When I was 17 my parents bought a car for me, but I paid all running costs myself using the income from my degree apprenticeship. My brother, who's about to go to university, just had a car bought for him but will also be getting all expenses paid for (approx £6,500 over three years), as he has no source of income. Am I within my rights to ask for the same amount back?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't always answer money moral dilemma questions as contributions are often emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be enjoyed as a point of debate and discussed at face value.

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scotsbob

Yeah go for it.


However you need to be prepared for your parents presenting you with a bill for the various "expenses" they have incurred on you behalf during your lifetime. Which up until now they have probably never thought of.


I hope they do.




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Marvel1

You be grateful they bought you a car in the first place.

harz99

Seriously MSE, you're a month early for this you know...

Tammykitty

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5603511

The original discussion

Emmama

My husband has gone through and is still going through his parents buying stuff for his sister (10 years difference)

All I can say is that you just deal with it. They are aware of what they are doing. They don't care. If you point it out to your sibling they don't care either. Learn from it and make sure when you have kids you don't do it and don't allow them to do it to your child.

its ultimately up to you. But don't be surprised if they turn round and charge you for everything or your kicked out or you start a massive argyement.

System

I went through this with my Mother too. Financially she played me off against my brother for years.

I can't begin to tell you of the resentment that ensued. You just live with it. Fight or walk away. I chose to walk away head held high.

Freebyman

Whatever you do you will not win, I too had a similar experience but this time over my wedding.

My parents took out a £5000 loan to help with my sisters wedding, fussed over it etc (shame it didnt last)

My wedding they wanted to do virtually nothing except bicker about who was invited (people who I barely knew etc) and offered a paltry £500 towards a honeymoon which they wanted to pick.

Result, Im still married 15 plus years later and my parents are no longer in my life.

Nobody ever wins in these situations.

Gloomendoom

I have two sisters.

I have absolutely no idea what my parents have or have not spent on them relative to myself, nor do I care.

Ageing_hippy

I can't believe you are asking this question. As a parent of two children we have always tried to be fair but it doesn't always work out. We spent far more on putting our son through uni as he lived away from home and his course attracted tuition fees, (our daughter's didn't and she lived at home). I would be very grateful that your parents bought you a car at all. The biggest present I ever had from my parents was a push bike aged 8 which I was still using age 15 even though it was far too small for me.

sudokulover

You had a wage (albeit small) ... your brother won't.