Am I being over sensitive

jamiehelsinki

To put another spin on this as well. I watch !!!!!! but I don't watch it consistently. I might watch it a few times each week for a month then not bother for a month, I would guess a lot of men are like this, of course others might watch it everyday while at the other end of the scale some might only watch it a few times each year.

I think it's fair to say that when I've gone through periods of lots of good sex I probably rarely used !!!!!! but relied on it more when I been having very little or not enough, it's basically a substitute for the real thing in my case.

FBaby

That's why they should be open about it from the start

So we are back to what? I watch !!!!!!, is that ok with you? No, not really, it makes me feel insecure. Ah, that's going to be a problem then because I can't promise I will stop and I don't want you to feel insecure, should we stop seeing each other now then?

I do agree with Person1 though that there is a limit to what !!!!!! I consider healthy and what I would think underlines some form of obsessive behaviour but that's not what OP found evidence of.

In any case, it's interesting that OP said they had talked about it and that they agreed they BOTH had insecurities. I wonder if his watching it is related to some insecurities too, or his are totally unrelated.

Malthusian

ripplyuk wrote: »

The difference is that !!!!!! is something which is still a bit of a social taboo.

So are bowel movements and masturbating. And watching football if you are middle class.

Don't ask, don't tell, unless it has a material effect on the other person.

Gloomendoom

Malthusian wrote: »

So are bowel movements and masturbating. And watching football if you are middle class.

Don't ask, don't tell, unless it has a material effect on the other person.

I have visions of some people on here turning up for a first date armed with a questionnaire.

System

Gloomendoom wrote: »

I have visions of some people on here turning up for a first date armed with a questionnaire.

No but i should imagine the subject would come up early in a relationship, when your getting to know one another.

Gloomendoom

Judi wrote: »

No but i should imagine the subject would come up early in a relationship, when your getting to know one another.

Really? In what context?

The first time !!!!!! came up in my relationship was when the topic was discussed (at length) in a church marriage preparation course (see previous post).

System

Gloomendoom wrote: »

Really? In what context?

The first time !!!!!! came up in my relationship was when the topic was discussed (at length) in a church marriage preparation course (see previous post).

Well maybe the embarrassment in one of the couples faces when something comes on the telly that is on after the watershed. Words dont have to be spoken you know. I'm not really a fan of action films, too much blood and gore (yes i know its not real). I dont say anything but if anything isnt to my taste, i just leave the room, i dont stamp my feet or make a fuss. Simple really. Sometimes hubby will turn it over, sometimes he's engrossed in it so i just let him get on with it.

Not a word spoken but hubby knows.

justme111

Yes he knows you do not like it ( in case of op they are just dating so that guy may not even know she does not like it )but how is your husband to know that you did not want him to watch it ever without you of it was the case?
Why would what one watches in private as long as it is legal be a concern of anybody else?

Malthusian

Judi wrote: »

Well maybe the embarrassment in one of the couples faces when something comes on the telly that is on after the watershed. Words dont have to be spoken you know. I'm not really a fan of action films, too much blood and gore (yes i know its not real). I dont say anything but if anything isnt to my taste, i just leave the room, i dont stamp my feet or make a fuss. Simple really. Sometimes hubby will turn it over, sometimes he's engrossed in it so i just let him get on with it.

What's that got to do with !!!!!!? My other half loves gory action films but I wouldn't take that as the green light to watch !!!!!! in front of them.

Your husband could deduce two things from this: 1) My wife doesn't like gory films. Women who are squeamish about bloody violence probably have a similar attitude to !!!!!!. Conclusion, I shouldn't watch !!!!!!.

Or, equally validly, 2) My wife doesn't like gory films, but if I'm watching one she's happy to leave the room and let me watch it while she does something else. My wife is laid back enough that she'll let me do stuff she finds objectionable and will leave the room to let me get on with it. Conclusion, I can watch !!!!!! while she is in another room.

This is the problem with unspoken agreements, you have what you think, what he thinks, what you think he thinks, and what he thinks you think, all of which may differ.

System

Malthusian wrote: »

What's that got to do with !!!!!!? My other half loves gory action films but I wouldn't take that as the green light to watch !!!!!! in front of them.

Its just an example.