Am I spoiling my kids??

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

Out,_Vile_Jelly wrote: »

Swimming is a great skill plus excellent exercise, Brownies is for making friends outside school and learning different things, saving is a fantastic habit to get into. It's only horse riding that's expensive, but is also good exercise in the fresh air and teaches discipline, patience and respect. If they're really into it they can help out at the stables in exchange for free rides when they're older. Shovelling !!!!!! makes you realise the value of your time and labour!

I would only suggest stop buying sweets yourself and give them a small amount of pocket money so they can learn how to calculate good value themselves. I remember agonising over how to spend my 20p; on midget gems that you got more of because they were lighter, or sherbet lemons which were heavier but lasted longer?

My eldest already does stay to help out (4 hours at the weekend) but unfortunately they aren't rewarded with free rides (but they do get recognition at the end of year and get a rosette)


Sweets - They aren't really bothered in sweets (I still have some left over from Halloween...) but I take my eldest shopping and we try and see "what's cheaper" (helps with her math) and I take her to the bank to get statements and how her how muh interest she earned etc so we have touched upon budgeting

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

catoutthebag wrote: »

I think those are fair if they don't get pocket monies.

But do you plan on buying them ponies:eek:

Maybe in the future one we can all ride.... lol

PasturesNew

I'm available for adoption if anybody's got a gap... never been on a horse, would love to go kayaking .... and I'm sure I could think of some other stuff I want

fairy_lights

I don't see the problem, it's not like your lavishing them with toys and sweets (unless that £16 per month is the budget for chocolate brownies), you're paying for activities which will teach them important life and social skills.
Could there be a element of jealousy involved, if your friends can't afford to do the same for their own children?

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

spadoosh wrote: »

£16 a month / 2 kids = £8 / ~4 weeks = £2 a week.


@ OP, doesnt seem that bad. Ok horse riding is a bit of a luxury thing but its hardly something theyd ever be able to save and pay for themselves really.

Is the savings for adult life? If so wouldnt say that was to unreasonable. If they can use it now might be different.

Swimming doesnt seem that unreasonable either. Maybe for the older child give them an equivalent pocket money and let them choose to spend on that or for something else, promotes a bit of fincial responsibility.

I spend about £20 a week but thats mainly milk powder and nappies.

Savings: This is for them to decide what to do with it. In an ideal world they would open Help2buy ISA's when they are old enough but its ultimately theirs to do what they want to (hopefully I can persuade them to be sensible though!)

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

tea_lover wrote: »

Brownies is 7-10, so the 5 yr old won't be going. Unless she goes to Rainbows maybe.

DD2 is rainbows (not long started) - sorry

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

PasturesNew wrote: »

I'm available for adoption if anybody's got a gap... never been on a horse, would love to go kayaking .... and I'm sure I could think of some other stuff I want

Would you do your homework on time though and go to bed at 8pm??

rach_k

I really dislike how people call it 'spoiling' children when you do something they don't or that they consider indulgent. We all have things we're happy to spend more money on - some spend on tech, some on food, some on activities or books.

One person could spend £1000/month on a child but parent them well and they wouldn't be 'spoiled'; another could spend £3/month and raise little monsters!

OP, I don't think your list sounds excessive unless it is causing hardship in other areas of your life. If you're going round with holes in your shoes because everything goes on the kids and they don't care, then you probably are 'spoiling' them, but as long as you can afford it and they appreciate it, go for it!

DUKE

I think it's money well spent if you can afford it. It's not like you're going out & buying them everything that they ask for, now that is spoiling your kids.

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

fairy_lights wrote: »

I don't see the problem, it's not like your lavishing them with toys and sweets (unless that £16 per month is the budget for chocolate brownies), you're paying for activities which will teach them important life and social skills.
Could there be a element of jealousy involved, if your friends can't afford to do the same for their own children?

I wouldn't have thought so - The "main" person who was vocal has 2 children who ride and go to brownies (but to different places - although I've never seen them ride / get rosettes etc so it could be they don't??)