Sashybo - Back Again

beanielou

You are a great mum 

Bluegreen143

Don’t feel bad Sashy! 

It’s obviously good to get some fresh air (park or walk or garden), but IMO young kids don’t actually need to go on outings per se. 

In fact in my experience the more expensive the outing the less fun they have, if you spend nothing taking them to splash in puddles they have a ball!! Plus being at home and having the chance to play and relax and bake etc - priceless.

Ignore your mum 😘 you’re doing great. 

Today I announced to my kids we were going to the library and my DS (7) gave a dramatic sigh and said “but I really want a day to just do things at home” 😂 we did go to the library, I reassured him it would only take a small amount of his precious time 😆

sashybo

Thanks all, my mum has always had this thing in her head about me being anti-social (I'm not, I just like my own company a lot of the time and don't like talking to strangers whereas she loves talking to random people everywhere she goes) and I think she's worried that I'll make the kids weird because they're not socialising enough.

They do go out, I just prefer to take them out when DH is with me as I do get anxious. 😥  I'm going to try and spend more time in the garden with them, we're going to try and get a bigger slide for them as the one they have is too small now. Hoping I'll have plenty to do plant wise out there as well.

Typically the weather has been much nicer today. 🤦‍♀️ We took the kids swimming and tried a different swimming pool nearby, it was much better than our usual one as had 2 flumes and a lazy river. The kids had a great time and didn't want to leave, I had to drag DD out screaming to the showers. 🤦‍♀️

It cost £10.50 for a family pass and then we spent another £25 on a McDs on the way home as the kids haven't had one for months. It's so much better as an occasional treat. So another spendy day but at least we had the money put aside in the family entertainment pot for it.

Used the last of the family fund up booking cinema tickets for next week as DH & I are taking DS to see the new mario film. DD is staying with my mum because she wouldn't have the attention span to sit through a full film atm. We have booked our seats and pre-ordered popcorn and a slushy type ice drink for DS. Hoping he'll enjoy himself. 🤞 

Now just need to rebuild the pot again for summer. 😭 I do need to up the amount that goes in every month but can't atm due to the debts. Something is better than nothing though and there are plenty of free things/places we can take them over the summer. We need to go back to the transport museum with them as they would probably enjoy that more now they're older and the outlaws ruined it last time sulking because we made them walk from the train station. 😂 

sashybo

Also my sister has gotten engaged and I don't like the guy much, he's a loser, doesn't work and sponges off her. He is the dad of her twins and they have been split up for years then started seeing each other again last year. 

My mum is now complaining because I don't want to go to my sister's engagement party, which is months away (FYI my mum doesn't like the guy either). Both DH & I are rostered to work late shift the night of the party so my mum would normally be watching the kids for me. My mum has basically just said tough she is going to the party so I'll need to get a lieu day or phone in sick. 

I feel really irritated that I'll either need to use up precious leave for a party I don't want to go to, full of people I have nothing in common with or phone in sick (i.e. lie) to work. Also there is no guarantee I would get the time off if I put in for a lieu day. My work are not interested if I have childcare problems and would just make me take unpaid leave so really I would have to phone in sick or lose a day's pay (which I can't afford).

DH is going to see if there's any chance of him getting the day off (doubtful) but I don't want to be forced to go to this party. 😐 If I wasn't working I would go for an hour to show my face (which is what my brother is doing as his daughter's birthday is that day and they are taking her out the following day so he can't be hungover). It will just be a booze fest full of the awful people this guy knows and his horrible family (they are genuinely horrible and I have known them distantly for years now due to my nieces being related to them). But being rostered to work just makes it such a PITA and causes so much hassle. This is the problem with not having any alternative childcare. 🤨 

beanielou

If only I was nearer I would happily help out 

redofromstart

Much sympathy on the party thing.

my boys (now 20 and 18) still say the best day out ever was at 4 and 5, jumping in their wellies in the floods around the local reservoir and driving home in underpants sat on carrier bags. The cafe was shut, and it's 10 minutes from home so pennies. They don't remember Thomasland etc!

sashybo

The thought is appreciated Beanie 😊 I’m hoping it will be a bit easier when the kids are bigger as they may be more willing to have mine or DH’s friends watch them now & again rather than always my mum. It makes it so difficult when there are family events & we are working etc.

I have put in for the damn lieu day, even if I get it I’ll just be showing my face & leaving within an hour. If I don’t get it then I’ll have a problem, nothing will be confirmed until a week beforehand anyway.

😂 Redo, kids enjoy the most random stuff. I think there’s a lot of pressure at times to be seen to be “doing things” and taking kids on big days out. We often end up stressed and don’t enjoy the day because we’re so busy trying to enjoy it iykwim.

sashybo

Got DH to get 2 washings on and hung out yesterday whilst I was at work. Today he has another washing to hang out.

DH then re-stained the patio table & chairs as the cover we used over the winter had been rubbing at some points in the wind. The cover is wrecked so we’ll need another for next winter.

After work I potted my cucumber and tomato seedlings on and have moved my blueberry plants out of the greenhouse. I need to set up netting for the big plant as it’s flowering and don’t want the neighbourhood magpies getting my blueberries!

The kids pottered about the garden playing with the water & sand pit. You can imagine how messy they were after that. 😂 They enjoyed themselves though & at least they were getting fresh air. 

DD also enjoyed going round looking at the plants with me, most of the raspberry canes I planted in the winter are showing signs of growth which is good. I probably won’t get much from them this year but as long as they grow I’ll be happy.

Need to look after them better though, am always rubbish at remembering how/when to prune raspberries for some reason.

sashybo

Oh forgot to mention that the outlaws want to come up for a visit next month. 😩

It’s DH’s long weekend so I’ll be working 2 of the days (thankfully) and the kids will be at school/nursery on the Friday. Not sure if they’re planning on arriving on the Thursday night or Friday afternoon (hoping Friday afternoon).

Of course they’ll be staying at the nearby hotel and not with us. It helps to have that separation. Still dreading it though as all they’ll do is complain about us/the kids/the house/the garden, take your pick.

It will be the usual if they arrive on the Thurs night - on the Friday DH will be dragged out to the pub with his dad and I’ll be left with MIL. If that’s the case I might suggest going shopping as MIL would enjoy that, she doesn’t get much opportunity to just have a look as FIL rushes her around.

At the weekend they won’t want to go anywhere with the kids as they seem to find them annoying. They have a weird aversion to taking them out to eat in public too. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Plus they don’t like having to walk anywhere/get the train and we’d have to take 2 cars as there are too many of us for 1 car. 

Then at night we all have to sit & listen to FIL’s outdated and passive aggressive opinions (tbh we all have to listen to this all day too) whilst he drinks half a bottle of wine then at least half a bottle of whiskey. 😟

enthusiasticsaver

Oh dear a visit with the outlaws sounds like purgatory. Makes you wonder why they come if they won't go out with the kids and do nothing but moan.  At least they aren't staying with you though.