Mooloo's Joining up the dots in 2017

Savvy_sewing

I am off to bed, hoping to sleep for longer than a couple of hours before I wake up.
Secure in the knowledge that DS is ok as he came to see me after the car we got passed it's MOT, he can get back to his house and to work. He has shifts Thursday Friday and Saturday.
secure in the knowledge that the rent isn't going to go up for two years.
I have talked to myself and looked at the positive things and feel better about myself then I did earlier in the day.

Savvy_sewing

Wednesday. No work. No school. So no rushing around.
I went to bed at about 10.30.
I woke at 12.30, somewhere around 3, ( I couldn't focus on the clock), 5.18 and 6.10.
No wonder I am always feeling tired.
The rain is continuing this morning and I didn't want to get out of bed.
I feel jaded, restless and rather negative.
As usual I look at my bank balances, I juggle my funds, I note the tax credits have come in, only £20 less than the amount before. Still no paperwork to tell me how it is calculated etc though.
A new lease in the emails to read, and get signed etc.
I watched a programme about a millionaire giving away a flat last night, and it impacted on my dreams, and it reminded me how I wanted to build up my own life to help others, like my Twins.
I used to have a dream that I made my fortune, that I converted a building into a mother and child units so people could be helped to keep their children unlike the Twins situation.
That unfortunately has lead me to write 12 pages in my diary of being unsatisfied with myself.
I have dreams, but I don't (today) feel as if I have done enough. I don't think I have managed myself very well.
I suppose I ended up being very self critical.
Not because I plan to be a woe is me moment.
More because I have not moved forward in life as much as I could have.
I realise today that my health issues are creeping back into my daily rambles and my lack of lustre is appearing. I realise that I no longer act on my plans. I realise that I say I must, I need, I should, I want.
But I don't do!
I stress about the mess, but I sit down and I list it.
I procrastinate
I say, tomorrow
My todo list gets written down and then I stop to have a cup of tea or lunch or dinner or a glass of wine.
I tell myself that I am looking after my self, remember to be careful not to go back to how ill I was. So I am not doing much except firefight problems.
I go to work and I am going through the motions, the daily routines but I am slower. I give the biggest jobs to the seamstress and I do the mundane work. I know what targets I have, I analyse and I plan. But I realise today that I waste my time, my output has slowed. My energy easily depleted.
So the things will not materialise, the savings won't grow, the mess won't disappear, the changes won't happen. Until I put in the work, I put in the Action and I sort out the grass routes of my problems.
Today is not quite my Ahha day. But I realise it is time for me to face up to my failings so that I can brain storm and find what my route problem is.
I need to decide on one action to start with.
The obvious answer as I type this is HEALTH.
So before I tackle all the problems I feel I have. I need to stop and take stock of my health.
As we are what we eat, etc I am going to start with my Food and Drink, and my Lack of Exercise.
I think I will book a doctors appointment when I get back from Spain for a MOT.
All the rest of the thoughts that crowd in on me, can wait, they have waited on my lists for long enough anyway!
So I am going to start with the Food cupboard and Fridge Freezer and try to Menu Plan better meals and have more fruit and vegetables and less processed food.
Doing that will lead to work on the Food Stores, the Food Budget and tidying the Kitchen Cupboards.
That's definitely enough for today.

Sorry for the rambling.
First is not a cup of tea this time. It's my Golden Paste and a drink of water and a food stock take.

Brighton_belle

I think you under estimate the effect of poor health and poor sleep Mooloo. It takes energy to be on the go on the time. I certainly can't be and never will be able to be.
I am in a position with my job where I could run my own business, and am frequently urged to because I am good at what I do (for someone else), but I choose to live on less because I know I am just not high energy entrepreneur material and the constant pressure would lead to a miserable life.
Of course your circs are different, with DGD to look after but I think I am just trying to say be kind to yourself, you set such big goals and the fact you don't hit them isn't surprising when you physically struggle. It is hard to accept needing to live small rather than big and the good thing about dreaming big is that you do achieve more than you might if you never tried. But you need to dream big and let go of what doesn't happen - but if I had the magic secret on how to achieve that I would be a rich woman

Savvy_sewing

I have done a stock take on the two food cupboards. It has taken me 21/2 hours. All because I want to Menu Plan!
I have stopped for Lunch, and this time my feet are up, and I had soup, but I found lots of flavoured teas so I'm about to try a green tea with jasmine.
Dgd is now playing scientist with concoctions in my kitchen! Could be interesting!
I have been sent a link about procrastination so going to have a little bit of research.
It's still raining here- non stop, and I have the lights on!

Savvy_sewing

I watched the video and followed along, and then instead of waiting until tonight I sat sewing school labels onto a customers job. However I have 18 short so tomorrow I will need to call her and see if she has anymore. Luckily I left the socks till the last. So all the expensive items are tagged.
I cleared up the kitchen-again! As Dgd has been experimenting with concoctions, and used no end of dishes.
I am yet to stock take the fridge and freezers, but I know that I have a freezer full of meats.
Tonight I want to use up the weird bits and pieces lurking in the fridge, so we will all be eating differently tonight.
My hands Hurt, and I could easily have a nap!
I was thinking about de cluttering the kitchen table next time I stand up. Little things I know. But just something that won't tax me too much.

pollyanna_26

Mooloo Is that the programme where they have to prove they deserve a home ? CH4 and 5 used have some good property , diy and other programmes but nowadays have a lot of what I call poverty !!!!!! . They seem to portray an over the top negative image just before theof those who struggle in many ways through circumstances of life . It impacts on the public perception and feeds the media bashing . Sorry just a pet hate of mine .

Meanwhile I think you're doing fine . Pacing where possible is a good strategy to adopt but I'm as guilty as others in not seeing it through real life doesn't run that way . It is worth doing when you can though .
Two things that help mine , my youngests and a lot of others hand , joint and muscle wise are IMAK gloves which are lightweight compression thermal gloves . They cover from partway up the wrist to just before the top finger joints . They help me keep knitting and sewing and often in bed when everything hurts they seem to help the sleep come .
The other is Perskindol active gel . It's just swiss herbs but I've used it for years and highly recommend . I notice the sciatica is troubling you and it makes a difference when mine starts . It's suitable from the neck to the feet and worth a try .
Both these things are on the big A site and no doubt many other sites . If you have a decent health store you may find the gel as it's made by Potters .
Worth having a look at the items on A . There are many reviews on them both .
Glad to see your DGD sounds to be a lot happpier now .
Onward and forward
polly xx
PS I seem to have mucked this up further up my post . Darn fibro . Hope you can read around it .

Savvy_sewing

I shall take a look!
I have mustered up the energy to put away a pile of clean clothes (not ironed) as I put them on the bed this morning/and BF has said he is coming over, and while I was at it, I Changed the bedding and it's now in the washing machine.
Yes I can understand why you would come to those conclusions about things, I hadn't tuned in deliberately it was on when something I had recorded stopped, it just made me remember how I had wanted to have a place that would keep families together and not pull them apart.
Mind you I can't see it ever happening as I would need a miracle and I am all out of them at the moment.
For now I will just have to plod along in my own sweet way. Doing what I can where I can.
Dgd had burgers chips and beans. I had last nights left over couscous and roast vegetables with two rashers of Turkey Bacon. When BF arrives he will have Turkey bacon sandwiches as he said a sandwich was fine.
Might do it like a BLT for him as I had salads from the Market that need to be eaten. They will form part of our packed lunches tomorrow too.

beanielou

Wise words from BB

Savvy_sewing

Morning. Still only getting around 2 hours sleep at a time. I took a GP around 2am and then next woke ( once I had gone to sleep ) at 5.15
BF came over, and I sorted out the Airport Carparking, as usual looking for deals, by using my AA membership I managed to get a 15% discount off of the price. I hadn't realised we are going from Stanstead this time. Alarm bells ring because BF is a stressful person when we travel and I am usually expected to know where we are going, etc and he will Snap if I stumble.
I have only ever been a passenger going there to collect my Mum a while ago. But I have no idea where car parks are, where to get the bus to the terminal etc
Should be interesting then!
Back to work today and hopefully with both staff in.
There is a wedding dress that needs a lot of work done ready for a fitting tomorrow. I hope that seamstress will be there early enough to get it all done in one day! If not I will just have to start it myself.
Dgd has her Holiday Club to go to. So that gives me peace of mind that I have until 6pm.
Pollyanna, I have ordered some gloves and gel. Worth trying it out I think.
Time to move!
Have a good day.

beanielou

Boo to BF being snappy
Hope wedding dress goes well.