Men - I despair

trailingspouse

Many thanks - seeing so many different perspectives has helped me put it into perspective.

It is indeed 'his' daughter - my step-daughter. We're in Australia for the wedding, so don't know the area (or the shops) well enough to just be able to 'pop' and get him some more. Besides, yesterday was a public holiday here, so many shops (but not all) closed, making it all the more complicated. The wedding is not for a few days yet, but today we travel down to where it will be taking place - 3 hours south of Perth, and therefore much harder to access shops of any kind. So I think some exasperation on my part was justified.

Maybe I do mother him, thus causing him to 'leave it to me'. Or maybe he is useless with clothes and therefore I have to step in and sort it out. I think the latter - if he hadn't got the wrong size, I wouldn't have had to find an alteration service. I was helping him out of the hole he'd got himself into, but I don't see that as mothering. I know he would help me if I'd made a mistake. But if I'd made the same mistake many times and knew that my OH was irritated by it, I wouldn't have been surprised if he got annoyed when it happened again and it really mattered.

The trousers were labelled '40R' - and regular is the correct length for him, normally. But I keep trying to explain to him that he still needs to try them on, because 'regular' can mean different things to different makers. It's just like shoe size - I'm a 5, but sometimes I have to buy the 6, and once I needed the 4! And the only way to be sure is to TRY THEM ON.

As to the socks - yes, black socks with brown shoes are a no no. And people would see them, when he sat down. A younger man may be able to get away with a fashion statement of some sort, but (as we've already established) fashion and clothing aren't his thing. Cream/fawn socks were what he needed, and we have now got a pair.

Ironically, he likes to look 'right' - he would have felt a right charlie if there had been nothing we could do and he'd had to go in the long trousers. Just doesn't seem to realise that looking 'right' takes a bit of planning.

[Deleted User]

I must be very strange.., I'm good at sewing and never thought twice about hemming the family's trousers by hand when someone can't/didn't get the right size. Its just not an issue for me.

I wouldn't even notice that black socks are a no no with brown trousers. I'd not even notice if they wore no socks (shock, horror). I would mind if someone wore a Tshirt to a wedding if a formal wedding, but that's about it, and I'd also appreciate I was probably being a bit stuffy about it. As long as you don't turn up in a bathing suit (or less), what does it matter? Surely a wedding is about two people who love each other declaring that love, and family and friends being around them to show support and love? Its not a paid performance for all participants.

74jax

trailingspouse wrote: »

A younger man may be able to get away with a fashion statement of some sort
.

I now think this is a wind up :rotfl: kiddies bored of playing with Santa's toys.

Black socks are now fashion statements :rotfl:

Gloomendoom

I only have black socks, all the same from M&S so, as long as I can find two, they will always match.

As to clothes sizes, I haven't a clue. I just buy what fits. The same with shoes. In theory I take a UK 12 but a lot of shops sell in Johnny Foreigner sizes and the conversion charts are way out.

Bogalot

trailingspouse wrote: »

As to the socks - yes, black socks with brown shoes are a no no. And people would see them, when he sat down. A younger man may be able to get away with a fashion statement of some sort, but (as we've already established) fashion and clothing aren't his thing. Cream/fawn socks were what he needed, and we have now got a pair.

Cream socks should be left to cricketers. I don't know where you have this idea that black socks with brown shoes are a no no or some kind of fashion statement, they're quite normal.

You may also be surprised to learn that they have shops all over Australia, even on holidays!

I'm feeling sorry for your husband. The trouser shortening didn't need to be an issue, if he'd asked at the hotel reception they'd have pointed him in the right direction, or even got it done for him. And he can wear whatever colour socks he wants to, without you passing comment.

Is the problem here that he can't/ won't do these things for himself, or that he's so sick of being henpecked he lets you take control for a quiet life?

GingerBob_3

trailingspouse wrote: »

Not all men - but my man in particular.

For the last 17 years I've been telling him to try clothes on before he buys them. For the last 17 years he's been surprised every time he's bought something (without trying it on) and then got it home and found that it doesn't fit. 17 years. He's in all other respects a clever bloke.

Just now (at his suggestion) we've had a last-minute try-on of our outfits for his daughter's wedding. It's an informal affair by UK standards, but still required the purchase of a new jacket and new trousers. He didn't try the trousers on when he bought them. They're too long for him. It's now too late to get them altered. I could possibly take them up myself, but it would be hand stitched (we're away from home so no access to a sewing machine), and I don't think it would look very good. I also don't feel like helping him much at the moment, as I'm extremely annoyed at him.

AND, it hasn't crossed his mind to think about what socks he's going to wear. His trousers are cream, his shoes are brown and he 'thinks' he might wear black socks. Over my dead body he will!!! But - we now need to go and buy him some appropriate socks!!

Honestly, a three year old would be easier. How can a man who is otherwise successful and organised be so cr*p when it comes to clothes?? This is a serious question - I REALLY need to know, before I wrap the trousers round his neck and stuff the black socks who knows where.

So that would be man, rather than men?


I don't know what you're bothered about. I rarely try clothes on prior to buying. My wife buys all my clothes, and takes them back if I don't like them - socks, underpants, jeans, the lot. Woman are much better at clothes than men, so I delegate.

Lily-Rose_3

74jax wrote: »

I now think this is a wind up :rotfl: kiddies bored of playing with Santa's toys.

Black socks are now fashion statements :rotfl:

Not really sure why people assume that if it's someone messing about, it must be kids on holiday.

I think the truth is far from that; I suspect it's people who are much older. My guess is that it's economically inactive middle-aged plus people; not school kids.

sparkychris

I know exactly how you feel OP

Occasionally my wife has the temerity to come downstairs in clothes she 'thinks' are acceptable for an evening out.

If I also find what she's wearing acceptable, she is permitted to wear it. Failing that I will take her back to the bedroom and pick out more fitting attire for her.

Women! I despair!

happyandcontented

We only have black socks in our house and they are worn with all shoe colours. I think cream socks are a no no personally.

I think the poor chap has been unlucky if he bought his usual size 40R and they were 4 inches too long.

Maybe it is travel and wedding stress that is blowing this up into a bigger problem than it need be!

Lily-Rose_3

sparkychris wrote: »

I know exactly how you feel OP

Occasionally my wife has the temerity to come downstairs in clothes she 'thinks' are acceptable for an evening out.

If I also find what she's wearing acceptable, she is permitted to wear it. Failing that I will take her back to the bedroom and pick out more fitting attire for her.

Women! I despair!

:rotfl::rotfl::T

If this had been the opening post, I think the responses would have been quite different.