Admitting you're OK without the kids at Christmas (now they've grown...)

Hermia

fierystormcloud wrote: »

Wonderful array of replies. Thank you.

Seems the general consensus is that it's not a big deal to feel fine with your offspring not spending Christmas with you, and some people actually enjoy it. Pretty cool that people don't feel afraid to admit it too. It's one of the last taboos I think, to admit you enjoy time without your children! :eek:

I never understand why there is that taboo! My parents were married for several years before they had me and they had a very happy, fun and romantic relationship. It therefore never shocked me that they were just as happy with me not coming home as me coming home. Maybe this taboo comes from the time when middle-aged parents were supposed to be sexless frumps who gave up every interest and passion when they had kids.

seven-day-weekend

Hermia wrote: »

I never understand why there is that taboo! My parents were married for several years before they had me and they had a very happy, fun and romantic relationship. It therefore never shocked me that they were just as happy with me not coming home as me coming home. Maybe this taboo comes from the time when middle-aged parents were supposed to be sexless frumps who gave up every interest and passion when they had kids.

We were married for nearly ten years before our son was born in 1980. We went to Spain without him for eight years in 2004 and also he now has his own home. We went back to being a couple. We were friends and lovers and husband and wife before we were parents. We just went back to being those things again and only go into parent mode when necessary

Absolutely essential in my opinion. Your children have their own lives, their parents should have theirs.

suki1964

I also wonder why it's taboo?

Hopefully time you have matured enough to make the choice of living/marrying a partner, you don't choose to have parents along for the honeymoon

ska_lover

Its not really a taboo subject is it to enjoy spending time without your adult offspring?

OH god suki, I know a couple who took parents to their honeymoon lol

annandale

Sorry but is it only me that thinks the opening post is just a ridiculous saga and that people need to get a life.

What I think is weird is that people know so much detail about co workers lives then splash it all over the Internet

System

gettingtheresometime wrote: »

Well I'm a bad mummy.

We've gone away for Christmas & won't be back until the New Year.

Son is on doggy sitting duties (for which we are giving him a cash contribution to his 2017 travel plans).

He's happy as he gets a nice cash injection & can have what he wants when he wants it for Christmas Dinner and we're happy as hubby can enjoy his holiday without worrying about what's happening with his work

Now i'm the opposite. Hubby would love to go away over Christmas but i wont go because our youngest wont be with us. He's the last of the 5 to leave the 'nest' and i wont even consider him staying at home on his own Christmas day. I dont mind going after Christmas till after the New Year but not Christmas day. Youngest says he doesnt mind us going but hell will freeze over before i leave him on his own on Christmas day.

suki1964

annandale wrote: »

Sorry but is it only me that thinks the opening post is just a ridiculous saga and that people need to get a life.

What I think is weird is that people know so much detail about co workers lives then splash it all over the Internet

Sorry, but is it only me who wonders who you used to be before you got a ppr?

You seem to have a lot to mock on these type of threads

JIL

My middle son won't be home for Christmas day this year and it's the first Christmas I won't have all of my children together for 28 years. I really do not mind, he lives with his girlfriend and her parents are going to stay with them. He lives 60 miles away. I am glad he is putting her first. He will come for a couple of days in the new year. The other children will be here, I will miss him but I really just want him to enjoy his Christmas.

annandale

Maybe it is.

Anyway, you win. No desire to get involved in a ridiculous game of who's who and I've got enough on my plate away from here at the moment to care.

See you. Didn't realise we all had to agree on everything but I stand corrected

Lunar_Eclipse

I think some people (usually women) live for their children and some don't. This highlights which camp the various people are in.

Having read some of the replies, it's made me think 'what the hell is it about Christmas that makes people act so crazy!' 😀 It's one day if the year and for those who aren't religious, it should virtually be a non event. We've gone mad.