Absolutely crushed by what I've seen. Need advice on what to do. :(

chesky

What do your friends think about him?

emberlyn

I don't really have many friends as I'm an introvert. I know this is probably really sad to admit but most of my friends are online. The guys from our guild who have all known him for a year+ think he's awesome.

My real life friends from college don't really know much about him. They know I'm seeing someone but I don't talk about him much as I' m a bit worried about being judged.

I find it much easier opening up to people online.

Guest101

emberlyn wrote: »

I don't really have many friends as I'm an introvert. I know this is probably really sad to admit but most of my friends are online. The guys from our guild who have all known him for a year+ think he's awesome.

My real life friends from college don't really know much about him. They know I'm seeing someone but I don't talk about him much as I' m a bit worried about being judged.

I find it much easier opening up to people online.

What you need to appreciate is, it's fine to meet people online, but their online persona may not be their reality.


You're playing RPGs presumably, role-playing, it may not be 'real'

emberlyn

I do get where you're coming from and I definitely feel that way about the other people in our guild. I couldn't even imagine meeting them in RL. I'd be way too shy. How I feel about my boyfriend is different to all the others though. We talk all day and night. Apart from when I'm sleeping or at college, we haven't even gone an hour without speaking. Our instant message conversations are endless daily. I know that's not real life but we don't live in the same city so we don't really have a choice.

The messages to his ex are still bothering me though, more so as time is going on as I keep ruminating over it. The fact that he said he's missing their time together just really worries me. From the joy he gets from our conversations and the amount of time he invests in me, it just surprises me. Someone on another forum said that his messages sound like what a caring person would send after a breakup, and that he wasn't asking her to get back together or that he loves her, he was just reassuring her. I'm just hoping that's the case.

MONEYTREE_2

I have a very long experience with men and my advice is, DROP HIM.

This man is trying to get back with the ex who dumped him.

He has already LIED to you about her. Never give a man who has lied a second chance.

What he's doing is using you as his Fallback Girl. In case she doesn't come back. Also probably as a Trophy to make her jealous.

Run away now before he's taken your virginity because that will hurt you even more.

Guest101

emberlyn wrote: »

I do get where you're coming from and I definitely feel that way about the other people in our guild. I couldn't even imagine meeting them in RL. I'd be way too shy. How I feel about my boyfriend is different to all the others though. We talk all day and night. Apart from when I'm sleeping or at college, we haven't even gone an hour without speaking. Our instant message conversations are endless daily. I know that's not real life but we don't live in the same city so we don't really have a choice.

The messages to his ex are still bothering me though, more so as time is going on as I keep ruminating over it. The fact that he said he's missing their time together just really worries me. From the joy he gets from our conversations and the amount of time he invests in me, it just surprises me. Someone on another forum said that his messages sound like what a caring person would send after a breakup, and that he wasn't asking her to get back together or that he loves her, he was just reassuring her. I'm just hoping that's the case.

He wasn't saying that, but if it bothers you it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks


You need to speak to him about it I think.

Metranil_Vavin

I'm sensing OP that really you are just looking for people to assure you that he's a great guy/cares for you/isn't messing about with his ex or trying to get back with her etc, and you'll carry on until it's either proved to be the case, or you end up really hurt.

Really not sure you are going to find what you want to read here as most people seem to agree that this bloke sounds more than a bit dodgy, so perhaps just settle for doing what you want until such time as you feel it isn't worth the heartache?

Good luck.

emberlyn

MONEYTREE wrote: »

This man is trying to get back with the ex who dumped him.

I have no idea if he's sent her any other texts since last Thursday, but all I know is that he's still talking to me for hours everyday and seems happy with me and wants me to see him over the christmas holiday.

I'm not saying you're wrong (I mean, you have a point, the fact he says he misses their time together is worrying) but if he really wanted to get back with her he'd end things with me and go back to her, not be planning christmas with me. She didn't dump him after all, she'd have him back in a heartbeat. That was obvious from the last text I read from her even though it was nearly a month ago. The reason she's not responding to him is because she's trying to get over him.

Guest101

emberlyn wrote: »

I have no idea if he's sent her any other texts since last Thursday, but all I know is that he's still talking to me for hours everyday and seems happy with me and wants me to see him over the christmas holiday.

I'm not saying you're wrong (I mean, you have a point, the fact he says he misses their time together is worrying) but if he really wanted to get back with her he'd end things with me and go back to her, not be planning christmas with me.

Why? You're in another city, eventually you'll be intimate and he'll 'get some', in the mean time he's playing online games and getting no ear ache from GF about it (rather encouragement)


- im not saying that's the case, but you're missing big gaps in your logic

emberlyn

Guest101 wrote: »

Why? You're in another city, eventually you'll be intimate and he'll 'get some', in the mean time he's playing online games and getting no ear ache from GF about it (rather encouragement)


- im not saying that's the case, but you're missing big gaps in your logic

What do you mean exactly? Sorry, I'm a bit lost on what you're trying to say.