Climbing the Mountain

maddiemay

Cheering you on Misty, head up, chest (polite word) out and let the other so and so's get on with their own lives. I wish life was not so tough for you, virtual hugs.
MM xx

MistyMountainTop

Thanks purplem02 and maddiemay!

My life really is not that hard maddie - it seems like a never-ending struggle at times but when I look at what other people in the world are dealing with, I know am incredibly fortunate. I have some challenges and health problems, but lots of people deal with much worse and just get on with it. The important thing is that it's not too late to turn things around, so I am focusing all my energy on changing what I can and am putting securing my future as my #1 goal.

My main goal for August is to put some structure into my days so that each day, no matter how small, I am taking a step towards my goals. Since the school holidays have started, things have descended into chaos - mainly because I've been so stressed about the things that have been going on in my life. Worrying and running around in circles just makes the situation worse so I have given myself a good shake. Bringing in money, staying healthy, and of course finding the elusive full time job are my top priorities, so I am aiming to something in each area every day to keep me moving forward. Practical things like list at least one item on evilbay, apply for at least one job, drink 2L of water, take my walk, etc.

There are several groups I have helped out with in the past, I have already resigned from one and am taking a big step back from the others, but it is probable that I will completely cut ties with them as well. One lady made me feel like I was being incredibly selfish as she has relied on me for admin stuff, but she has her own house and plenty of money in the bank. I didn't feel an ounce of guilt and felt so much lighter once it was done. It's been too long since I've really put myself first, it's a very empowering feeling! :T

[Deleted User]

Hi Misty,

Putting yourself first is very much needed and I'm glad to see that you are doing I'm sure you'll reap the benefits of it.

I'm sure that the woman in question will cope or she'll find someone else, good on you for not feeling guilty.

Don't forget to add on to your cv about the admin that you have done, voluntary or not, it should still help in you finding a job xx

Chrystal

MistyMountainTop wrote: »

Thanks purplem02 and maddiemay!

My life really is not that hard maddie - it seems like a never-ending struggle at times but when I look at what other people in the world are dealing with, I know am incredibly fortunate. I have some challenges and health problems, but lots of people deal with much worse and just get on with it. The important thing is that it's not too late to turn things around, so I am focusing all my energy on changing what I can and am putting securing my future as my #1 goal.

My main goal for August is to put some structure into my days so that each day, no matter how small, I am taking a step towards my goals. Since the school holidays have started, things have descended into chaos - mainly because I've been so stressed about the things that have been going on in my life. Worrying and running around in circles just makes the situation worse so I have given myself a good shake. Bringing in money, staying healthy, and of course finding the elusive full time job are my top priorities, so I am aiming to something in each area every day to keep me moving forward. Practical things like list at least one item on evilbay, apply for at least one job, drink 2L of water, take my walk, etc.

There are several groups I have helped out with in the past, I have already resigned from one and am taking a big step back from the others, but it is probable that I will completely cut ties with them as well. One lady made me feel like I was being incredibly selfish as she has relied on me for admin stuff, but she has her own house and plenty of money in the bank. I didn't feel an ounce of guilt and felt so much lighter once it was done. It's been too long since I've really put myself first, it's a very empowering feeling! :T

Well done Misty! :beer:
My problems are entirely different to yours but I can so relate to putting myself last in the pecking order, and the need to change that. I'm wishing you all the Luck in the world.X

Subscribing.

UncannyScot

Hi Misty
Good for you on cutting ties there...
Have been in that situation myself... had my good nature taken advantage of until I had a LBM and thought !!!!!!? NO!
There are some folks in charitable work who will happily load THEIR responsibilities onto volunteers while THEY rake in the pay and kudos...
There is nothing wrong in looking after yourself...
I look after myself and I also look out for others, balance is the key.
Do not be taken advantage of and likewise do not take advantage of others...

MistyMountainTop

Thank you all, I am very grateful for your support!

Sometimes I volunteer for something thinking I will have the time and energy or that I will enjoy it but it ends up being much more involved or hassle than I first thought. I don't like letting people down so I will continue even when it's not in my best interest. Recent events have helped me see that the best thing I could do is quit everything so I have the time and energy to concentrate on securing my future and owing a place of my own. The other stuff has been a big distraction from what is important.

I made the decision a few days ago to deal with conflict or anything unpleasant that I would rather avoid ASAP so I don't waste any more of my time and energy worrying about it or thinking how I can get out of it without facing it head on. Choosing to face it rather than being backed into a corner is another empowering feeling and the more I am doing it, the easier it is getting.

Today I am listing more on eviilbay, tidying up, working out a meal plan for the next few days, going over the bank statement. Nothing exciting, but all things that need to be done. Still feeling very positive and motivated.

MistyMountainTop

Just got out of another ongoing commitment :j

[Deleted User]

You sound really positive and happier Well deserved too.

MistyMountainTop

Thanks purplemum02, being proactive instead of reactive has changed my perspective on things. I'm sure I'll still have days when it all gets to me but at the moment I do feel much better, I think part of it was the shock at what happened and accepting that things are different now and I just need to get on with it.

I have found that only going on my laptop first thing in the morning or last thing at night (unless there is something I need to do with spreadsheets,etc) has really helped me use my time more wisely. I try and use the iPad mini during the day for emails, etc. It's not something I enjoy "surfing" on so I'm far less likely to get lost clicking links that show cute kitten videos!:o

MistyMountainTop

I'm spending the morning searching for jobs that I can apply for, taking my walk, and list bits and bobs on evilbay this the afternoon.

It's lovely and sunny, I'm already looking forward to my walk!